pe Page 982 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Your Scripps National Spelling Bee Live Blog
You know what the national spelling needs to make it even more compelling? INJURIES. No one ever gets physically injured during a spelling bee. Oh sure, there's extensive PSYCHOLOGICAL damage that occurs when children get eliminated and their dads won't even give them a hug when they get escorted ba...

Fan Sues Pittsburgh Penguins For Sending Him Too Many Text Messages
The Pittsburgh Penguins figure to have a pretty busy offseason. They have to shore up their defense even though they're stuck with Paul Martin's hefty contract. On July 1, they can begin to negotiate new deals with Sidney Crosby and Jordan Staal, whose current pacts expire after next season. And, li...

The Joe Paterno Tribute Song The World Has Been Waiting For
This isn't the first song honoring Joe Paterno, but it's totally the best. Coming to us from Joey Welz, "The Boogie Woogie King of Rock 'n' Roll" and his Casio synthesizer, I so very proudly give you his latest single, "Tribute To Joe Paterno."...

ESPN Misspells Simple Word In Spelling Bee Graphic
South. S-O-O-U-T-H. South....

Rafael Nadal Is Neurotic About Everything (Including Ham)
Rafael Nadal is a troubled soul who hates lots of things. This week, Nadal revealed yet another thing he hates:...

Fifth-Tier Amateur Soccer Club Beats Portland Timbers In Biggest U.S. Open Cup Upset Ever
It's been a rough week for MLS teams in U.S. Open Cup competition, as eight teams from the nation's top soccer league fell to lower-tier competition in the tournament open to all sanctioned clubs in the country. The latest such loss is the most embarrassing, as the Portland Timbers lost 1-0 in extr...

The Roger Clemens Trial Is Still Bizarre And Pointless
We're well in to the seventh week of the Roger Clemens perjury trial—holy christ, seven weeks? You can be forgiven for ignoring this one, the second trial, since the first ended with a mistrial on day two. Most thinking people assume Clemens used PEDs, and most thinking people don't really care anym...

Working For ESPN In The Post-Sarah Phillips Era? Have Your Resume Handy.
What does it mean to work at ESPN in a post-Sarah Phillips world?...

"Sabermetrics" Was A Word In The Scripps National Spelling Bee
The Scripps National Spelling Bee, which alongside poker, cheerleading, and hot dog eating constitute the E for Entertainment in ESPN, featured an actual sports word in the third preliminary round of its competition today in Washington, D.C. as "sabermetrics" made its appearance....

DeShawn Stevenson Has An ATM In His Kitchen, For Some Odd Reason
It is the God-given right of any stinking rich American to own and possess all types of weird things, but we've never seen what appears to be a working ATM in someone's kitchen before. Maybe this is Nets forward DeShawn Stevenson's early retirement plan, living off the $2 transaction fees from famil...

The 6-Year-Old Who Qualified For The National Spelling Bee Might Be An Alien
At the tender age of six, Lori Anne Madison just became the youngest person ever to qualify for the Scripps National Nerd Olympics, otherwise known as the Spelling Bee. But despite the media attention and mounting pressure, Lori Anne says she's not nervous at all. "I've been in competitions with old...

Here's Why This Guy Looks Better Than You
If you find yourself heading down to the Lower East Side to soak up some that ghost-of-CBGBs/Arlene's Grocery/Motor City, um, essence, and happen to also be in the market for a gorgeous custom-fitted suit, stop by SEW on Mott Street. Inside, you'll find proprietor Scott Evan Wasserberger, the besp...

In Most Annoying Twitter Fight Ever, Rick Reilly Defends George Will From Donald Trump
Donald Trump, when he's not questioning Barack Obama's citizenship or trying to revive his years-old slap-fight with Rosie O'Donnell, sometimes says funny things on Twitter. Not "ha-ha" funny things, but "your weird uncle walking around with his robe open at Thanksgiving" funny things....

Serena Williams Gives Us A French Open Collapse For The Ages
After winning the first set handily from someone named Virginie Razzano, Serena Williams was leading the second set tiebreak 5-1. She dropped six straight points for the set, and the first five games of the third (in which Serena only managed six points)....

Metta World Peace Wishes You All A Happy Labor Day
In a way, it is sort of fitting that World Peace can't remember Memorial Day, but we're guessing this has less to do with Metta being meta and more to do with Metta being Metta. Enjoy it....

The Odds Ever Favor The Truly Regional NCAA Baseball Bracket
The NCAA has just announced its baseball championship bracket, to approximately one billionth of the fanfare that its annual orgy of uneducated guesswork, the basketball championships, engenders. But take a moment to appreciate the symmetry, and the humble nature of the appropriately named Regionals...

Deadspin's Memorial Day Weekend Barbecue Recipe Swap
I know we've got a few foodies in our ranks here and this being a big barbecue party weekend I figured today would be a good day to do a good old fashioned recipe swap. "Sean, is that a thing?" Well, I don't know, but I'm going to share my favorite recipe (full list of ingredients below, for your c...

Your Saturday Afternoon Open Thread Smorgasbord
Baseball is king this weekend as hockey is done until Wednesday and the NBA does not get under way until tonight at 8:00 p.m. when Philly and Boston meet up for Game 7. Enjoy the day being inside avoiding that one weird uncle you all have....

Here Is An Interpretive Dance Featuring Two Dudes, An Inflatable Globe And The Gilded Voice Of Peabo Bryson
It's a holiday weekend, so you're getting this bizarre yet entertaining video of a dance routine set to "A Whole New World" from Disney's Aladdin. [Beantown Banter]...

David Segui Led A Parents' Uprising Against The Shady Coach At Bryce Harper's Junior College
Long before Bryce Harper injected D.C. with Natitude, he played for the College of Southern Nevada Coyotes. Harper was then the same athletic freak he is now. He left after one season because he was draft-eligible and the Nats offered a lot of money. But, according to sources quoted in the Las Veg...