people Page 66 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Future Of Baseball Won't Look The Way You Expect
Back in 2017, the American League’s top Most Valuable Player candidates were New York’s Aaron Judge and Houston’s José Altuve. Judge, at 6-foot-7 and 280-some pounds and with his ungodly exit velocities and tape-measure home runs, was widely hailed as THE FUTURE OF BASEBALL. In the future, all power...
Guy Commandeers Horse, Tries To Get On The Track At The Breeders' Cup
White people are regularly getting out of hand at horse racing events, and things were no different Saturday at the Breeders’ Cup. A 24-year-old Kentucky man named Michael Wells-Rody was arrested at Churchill Downs for sneaking into a restricted area, jumping on a horse, and trying to ride it out on...
I Am The Youngest Pro Shuffleboard Player In Florida
It’s 9:05 a.m. While my friends and pretty much everyone my own age are getting settled behind desks and spreadsheets and scheduling the day’s meetings, I’m surrounded by senior citizens, about to make the first shot of my pro season. It’s already 90 degrees and my bald head is pouring sweat into my...
Report: Maryland Football Players Get Jackass Maryland Booster Kicked Off Michigan Trip
Maryland football players pressured athletic staff to remove a team booster who made insensitive comments about the death of Jordan McNair from the team’s charter flight to Michigan on Friday, according to a report from ESPN’s Adam Rittenberg. The booster is a local attorney in Maryland who decided ...
Person In Chicken Mask Celebrates Engagement Between Penn State Fans
The cool crisp air that signals the beginning of fall also signals the beginning of another important time of the year: cuffing season. On ESPN’s College Gameday broadcast from Happy Valley, one Penn State fan decided to take advantage of the reason for the season and proposed to his significant oth...
Auld Lad At Ireland Bookie Shop Thwarts Three Armed Robbers
There may come a time in life when you’re 83 years old and posted up at the bookies in Glanmire, Ireland, enjoying the retired life. When three men wielding hammers and a gun barge in, what will you do? “You can either run and hide or take a stand and I took a stand,” was the answer that Denis O’Co...
All It Takes To Make A 49ers Game Fun Is A $12,500-A-Year Field-Level Leather Recliner<em></em><em></em>
A floor seat at a basketball game has a powerful cultural weight. It helps that it’s the best and most exciting way to watch a basketball game, but it’s appeal goes beyond that. Those seats are where celebrities and investors go to see the game and be seen watching that game—a badge of wealth and pr...
UFC Champion Khabib Nurmagomedov Posts Gross Video Mocking Homeless People
Conor McGregor will return from his two-year hiatus from the UFC to fight Khabib Nurmagomedov for the lightweight championship belt on Oct. 6. The press tour for that fight will inevitably be full of wild, often-exhausting trash talk, and fans will all get sick of these two assholes before one of th...
Here Is A Legally Blind 96-Year-Old Great-Grandmother Who Would Kick Your Ass At Bowling
Kathryn Robinson will turn 97 years old next week. Also, according to this delightful Palm Beach Post report, she “lost all sight in one eye and most in the other,” making her legally blind. But that does not stop her from being a tremendous bowler:...
Let's Remember Some Guys: WrestleMania Vol. III<em></em>
Remembering Guys does not necessarily have to involve trading cards. It’s a pursuit that can be equally at home anywhere on earth—a crowded train or a vast and silent desert work just about equally well for these purposes. I am Remembering a Guy right now. It’s the beefy former Mets corner infield p...
Kobe Bryant Still Wants To Help Your Kids Be More Like Kobe Bryant<em></em><em></em>
During the question-and-answer session that followed the screening of Kobe Bryant’s short film Dear Basketball at the Tribeca Film Festival last spring, Bryant said a lot of things that would have been very hard to credit from anyone less driven or deeply weird than Kobe Bryant. He used a lot of the...
My 84-Year-Old Neighbor Has The Only Good NBA Takes
BLOOMINGTON, Ind. — Iris Clawson, who turns 85 this year, loves at least three things in life: puzzles, westerns, and the National Basketball Association. “Every night I turn on the TV to see if there are any games,” she says, and during the regular season she watches five or six a week....
Here Is A Twitter Account I Have Been Enjoying This World Cup
Just consider this a recommendation for People But With Small Head, a Twitter account where, as it explains, “it is people but small head.”...
58 Future Jason Bateman Films
Today we read the following story of how the Jason Bateman vehicle Game Night came to pass. ...
The Mets Screwed Up A Chance At Greatness Because They Couldn't Stop Being The Mets
When the Mets stuck Jacob deGrom with his second loss of the season on Wednesday afternoon, it was their 10th defeat in 11 games. DeGrom, who has been the best starting pitcher in the National League, allowed just one earned run and struck out seven over seven innings. The Mets didn’t get a hit off ...
Watching The NBA Finals At Oracle Arena With The Overlords And Oligarchs In Club Prick
I watched Game 1 of the NBA Finals from extremely expensive seats in Oracle Arena, but I didn’t see J.R. Smith’s towering goof....
Gaze Upon This Mavericks Box Score, And Despair
The Dallas Mavericks, who have spent most of the season doing everything they can to lose games on purpose, fucked up big time on Tuesday night when they beat a very good, playoff-bound Blazers team. This gave them 24 victories on the season, and put them in danger of being passed in The Great Tank ...
I Blame Chris Brown
Here are just a few, tiny things that happened in a dark, bizarre, depressing Year of our Lord 2018:...
Seahawks Players Accosted By Woman: "Get Off Your Fucking Knees"
Seattle Seahawks cornerback Neiko Thorpe took a video of a crazy person who yelled at him and teammate Mike Tyson about their apparent disrespect for the American flag....
Netherlands Short-Track Team Wins Bronze Medal For World-Record Race, Didn’t Even Compete In Final
Short-track speed skating has been popular since its introduction to the Winter Olympics in 1992 for two reasons: its high-speed, exciting races and the propensity for athletes to crash. And in yesterday’s women’s 3,000-meter short-track relay, fans got to see both. ...