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NPR: Ebola Might Make Chocolate Expensive (While Killing Lots Of People)
Yeesh. Lotta scary Ebola news these days. Between the situation in Africa seemingly spiraling beyond anyone's control, a botched containment job at Texas Health Presbyterian Hospital, and exposed people breaking quarantine to go strolling around New Jersey, presumably barfing Ebola blood on school...

Ball State Football Players Allegedly Involved In "Poo Dollar" Prank
The "poo dollar" is a prank in which a person—likely a teen because teens are the absolute worst—wipes their ass with a dollar and then leaves it on the ground so that an unsuspecting mark will them come and pick it up and get poop all over their hand. According to police, three Ball State football ...

Derek Roy Makes Miraculous Goal Line Clearance
Flames forward Devin Setoguchi had to have thought, if only for a split second, that he scored. Ninety-five percent of the puck crossed the goal line on his shot, but before that final five percent could, Predators center Derek Roy backhanded it away. This is why we have goal line technology....

FA Charges Rio Ferdinand With Misconduct, Probably For "Yo Mama" Joke
The English FA can't really be this uptight, can they? Today, the Premier League's governing body has announced that it has charged QPR's Rio Ferdinand with misconduct for a Tweet of his, without mentioning the specific one. It appears that it is this little bit of humor, sent to a bantering Mancu...

Mike Nugent's Missed Field Goal Was The Costliest Play Of Week 6
On the last play of a tied overtime game Mike Nugent missed a chip-shot field goal, which would have won the game for the Bengals. The miss led to the first tie in the NFL this season and was the most detrimental play of the week. According to data from Brian Burke of Advanced Football Analytics...
![Man In Wheelchair Claims Eagles Fan Stole His Prosthetic Leg At Game [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/fk5ng6hfqp4tad9ltiz0.png)
Man In Wheelchair Claims Eagles Fan Stole His Prosthetic Leg At Game [UPDATE]
This is a new one. Sonny Forriest, Jr., an Eagles fan in a wheelchair who sings outside Lincoln Financial Field, says a woman wearing Eagles apparel stole his prosthetic leg Sunday night....

Ronnie Price Loses Shoe, Turns Over Ball, Throws Shoe, Gets Technical
Via @cjzero, here's Lakers point guard Ronnie Price losing his shoe, turning over the ball, and throwing the shoe at Andre Iguodala in an attempt to play defense. The shoe throw didn't work, of course, and Price received a technical foul for his innovation....

Why Paul Newman Just Got Better With Age
This week's curation at the Beast is Peter Richmond's fine 1995 GQ profile of Paul Newman:...

Low Socks and Chop Blocks: Why And How To Avoid Watching The NFL Today
So, you may have heard, the NFL fined Colin Kaepernick $10,000 for wearing the wrong headphones to a post-game presser last Sunday....

Jürgen Klinsmann Wishes America Would Adopt Promotion And Relegation
It's another international fixture break, which means it's another opportunity for Jürgen Klinsmann to get his message out to the media, which means it's yet another chance for him to criticise America's domestic leagues. This time, his beef is with the lack of promotion and relegation....

It's Time To Fall Back In Love With Prince
So Prince put out two sneaky-great new albums last week, and it's understandable that your impulse was to ignore or at least wildly underestimate them, but yeah, don't....

The NHL Probably Shouldn't Hire Chris Pronger, Who's Still A Flyer
Chris Pronger hasn't played since 2011, but he remains under contract with the Flyers through 2017. That alone seems like enough to preclude Pronger taking a job in the league office. You'd think! ...

The Thinking Fan's Guide To The 2014-15 NHL Season
We enter a very different NHL after the "Summer of Stats," and we have the Maple Leafs to thank....

This Is What The WWE Has Reduced Itself To
Send stories, photos, and anything else you might have to [email protected]....

Matt Forte's Fumble Was The Most Damaging Play Of Week 5
With under fives minutes to play in a tie game, Chicago possessed the ball with an opportunity to control the clock and take the lead. But Matt Forte fumbled in what was the most detrimental play of the week. According to data from Brian Burke of Advanced Football Analytics the fumble lowered th...

Counterprogramming Football: What To Watch Today Instead Of The NFL
In evaluating the NFL's concussion protocol, it's important to look at why concussions are dangerous in the first place. For helpful perspective on this, let's step away from football and look at a much more direct activity centered around doing awful damage to an opponent's brain: boxing....

Alexis Knocks Chelsea Keeper Out Cold; Keeper Stays In Game
Early in today's match between Arsenal and Chelsea at Stamford Bridge, Arsenal midfielder Alexis Sánchez turned to run down a hopeful ball over the top, nearly got on the end of it, and ended his run by plowing his hip through Chelsea goalkeeper Thibaut Courtois's head. Courtois appeared to be knock...

In England, A Team's Fans Are Sometimes More Powerful Than The Owner
This story is a great example of the fundamental differences between European soccer clubs and American franchises. ...

Prince Songs To Fuck To, Ranked
Prince released two new records this week. And since Art Official Age and PlectrumElectrum (as with all releases from the world's most seductive singer) are loaded with sexiness, it's an appropriate time to attempt to quantify his past sexiness. Let's do this....

Thirteen Ways Of Looking At Greg Maddux
A record producer friend once told me that Check Your Head, the Beastie Boys' 3rd album, was perfectly realized. That's stuck with me over the years, the idea of being able to achieve something that lives up to your ambition. In a 1978 Playboy Interview, Bob Dylan said: "The closest I ever got to t...