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Wayne Routledge Scores With A Beautiful Chest-High Volley
Mmmmm, this contorted, leaping volley from outside the box by Swansea City's Wayne Routledge is just delicious. How did he get his foot so high?...
![Yep, That's An Idiot's Dong Featured On ESPN.com [NSFW]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/vbmcnxwu1jgw4cs8rbhl.jpg)
Yep, That's An Idiot's Dong Featured On ESPN.com [NSFW]
Tonight's Cubs-Cardinals game in St. Louis was interrupted by an Idiot On The Field who invaded Busch Stadium's turf clad only in a pair of boxers. One AP photographer spotted the hooligan just as he was apprehended with his junk hanging out the fly of his shorts; ESPN proceeded to put the photo on ...

Cowboys Fans Got Ripped Off More Than Any Other Fans This Pre-Season
There's no great secret that pre-season tickets are the biggest scam in the great cascade of scams that fuels the NFL machine. Season-ticket holders are compelled to pay full freight for two meaningless games played by guys they've never before or will ever again hear of. ...

The Making And Unmaking Of Preston Zimmerman, American Soccer Player
A version of this story originally appeared in the fall 2012 edition of XI Quarterly. ...

This Giant Crab-Topped Pretzel Is A Tasty-Looking Horror
From the DC Sports Bog comes word that the University of Maryland will begin selling a 1.5-pound crab-and-cheese-bedecked soft pretzel called "the Chessie" (short for "Chesapeake," presumably) during the upcoming football season. That is to say, the pretzel alone weighs 24 ounces. Presumably t...

Hustler's Handbook
Here's Pat Jordan's 1971 Sports Illustrated pool room story, "A Clutch of Odd Birds." It's the kind of piece you don't see much these days and worth a read. ...

NFL Fines Pete Carroll, Seahawks For Contact In Offseason Practice
Pete Carroll and the Seahawks will be fined approximately $300,000 for "excessive contact between players during a June 16 practice," according to Chris Mortensen. The team will also lose two minicamp practices next season. Another report said the NFL Players Association looked into a possible viola...

Cyclist Crashes Through Team Car's Rear Window
Cyclist Ian Crane was freakishly injured during yesterday's final stage of the USA Pro Challenge in Colorado, when he came off his bike and went through the rear window of a team car that stopped short in front of him. He remains sedated in the hospital, and is listed in stable condition....

Ain't No Liga Like The One I Got: Your 2014-15 La Liga Preview
Here we are. The La Liga season has just started up, and now we get to watch the league with the world's three best players, its two best teams, and the saddest hodgepodge of patsies since Enter the Dragon. In spite of these financial realities, Spain managed to produce Europe's wildest title race...

Matt Prater Suspended Four Games, Could Have Been The Whole Season
Broncos kicker Matt Prater negotiated a year-long suspension for an alcohol-related violation of the NFL's substance abuse policy into a four-game suspension. Prater has been in the league's alcohol program since he was charged with DUI and leaving the scene of a crash in August, 2011. ...

This Is The Best Hockey Goal You Will See All Day
OK, so this is also the only hockey goal you are likely to see today, but do you know what that changes? Nothing. You are watching 20-year-old Kloten winger Vincent Praplan turn Champions Hockey League opponent HV71 into his own personal Washington Generals. ...

Did Mesut Özil Actually Suck Last Year? Whose Fault Was That?
It was easy to blame Mesut Özil, because it's easy to blame any athlete for anything. But last year, it was particularly easy to blame Mesut Özil. He arrived under the halo of his record £42.5 million fee at Arsenal, implicitly anointing him Savior, a title that almost always preempts failure....

Mauro Zárate Drills Home Magnificent Volley Off The Deflection
West Ham United took a 1-0 lead on Crystal Palace today when Mauro Zárate—in his first start for a new squad—lined up a volley after a sky-high deflection of a shot from teammate Mark Noble....

Matt Simms Celebrates Touchdown Pass With Salsa Dancing
Fans who tuned into tonight's Big Apple Derby between the Giants and Jets might have expected to see some salsa dancing from G-Men receiver Victor Cruz. That didn't happen, but the Jets' scrub QB Matt Simms filled in the gap with some terrific white dude moves after a late-game touchdown heave to Gr...

How Philly's Little Leaguers Reclaimed "Taney" From America's Shame
You may never hear from Mo'ne Davis again. But even so, she and her teammates have already accomplished something amazing: They've taken back the name "Taney" from history's shit list. In a wonderful stroke of ironic resonance, the name that now evokes a mixed-race, inner-city little league team tha...

The Darkest Knight
Dig this profile of Frank Miller by Sean Howe for Wired:...

Complaint: Le'Veon Bell Had No Idea He Could Get A DUI For Weed
WPXI in Pittsburgh has obtained and released part of the criminal complaint for Wednesday arrest of Steelers running backs Le'Veon Bell and LeGarrette Blount in Ross Township, outside of Pittsburgh. Yesterday, just before they played in a preseason game against the Eagles, the two were formally char...

Premier League Text Message Scandal Is Making Everybody Stupid
May you never have to be defended by Harry Redknapp. ...

Shea Weber Can't Find The Net
Here's a really worrying portent for the accuracy of Shea Weber's slapshot, as tweeted out by teammate Seth Jones:...
