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No Rookie Has Ever Homered Like Aristides Aquino
The Reds outfielder with the cool nickname and the even cooler actual name was called up on Aug. 1 after the Reds shipped away Yasiel Puig, and he’s done nothing but hit dingers. Dinger after dinger after dinger. Here’s Monday night’s dinger:...

Reds' Aristides Aquino Broke The Cubs And Made Some History
Reds rookie Aristides Aquino decided to have his breakout game against the Cubs on Saturday with three home runs in his first three at-bats, and a new record of becoming the first rookie to smash a dinger in three consecutive innings....

Why Your Team Sucks 2019: Washington Redskins
Some people are fans of the Washington Redskins. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Washington Redskins. This 2019 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. Read all the previews so far here....

Javy Báez Spices Up Garbage-Time Plate Appearance, Bats Lefty
The ninth inning of Thursday night’s Cubs-Reds game was a real circus, and I mean that in a good way. The Reds were down 12–5, they’d used four pitchers, and they were not coming back, so to finish the eighth and work the ninth they turned pitching duties over to Kyle Farmer, a second baseman. Farme...

Monica Puig Serves Up A Smashing Ceremonial First Pitch
It’s generally lame when non-baseball athletes use non-baseballs to complete ceremonial first pitches. You see this most often with football players, using their vile spheroids to throw first pitches that really have nothing to do with the sport of baseball. If you can’t get a baseball all the way t...

Freddie Kitchens Says He'll Fire Anyone Who Speaks Anonymously To The Press
Head coach Freddie Kitchens wishes to make it known that under no circumstances will any sensitive or inside information be leaked from the Cleveland Browns organization under his watch, period. Or, at the very least, there will be hell to pay for anyone who passes such information along to the pres...

Protective Netting Saves Gio Urshela And A Fan From Collision After Terrific Catch
Just a couple of days after Mets right fielder Jeff McNeil turned into Spider-Man thanks to the new extended netting in Chicago, Gio Urshela, the other New York team’s third baseman, used the netting at Yankee Stadium to snag a foul ball without toppling into the stands, saving himself and one lucky...

Trevor Bauer Enjoyed Feeling Like A Human For A Change
It’s been a turbulent few days for Trevor Bauer. His start Sunday was perhaps his worst of the year, and ended with Bauer angrily chucking the ball all the way over the wall in center. For that he was chewed out by manager Terry Francona, and later fined by MLB. Before Francona could decide whether ...

MLB Suspends Four Pirates, Three Reds, One Guy Who's Now On A Different Team For Brawl
MLB has announced the fallout for Tuesday night’s brawl during Pirates-Reds: Six players and both managers have been suspended. Pittsburgh relief pitcher Keone Kela “won” with the longest punishment at 10 games, but all the players are appealing theirs....

Report: Trent Williams's Beef With The Skins Runs Pretty Deep
Offensive lineman Trent Williams’s holdout from Washington’s training camp doesn’t look like it’s going to end anytime soon. But Williams’s issues with the Skins appear to date back much further than previously believed, and the relationship may indeed be broken beyond repair....

Rick Porcello Smashes Two TVs After Mildly Unpleasant First Inning, Ought To Maybe Chill
Boston Red Sox starter Rick Porcello has had a rough season. His 5.55 earned run average entering Wednesday night’s start is a career-worst; his WHIP is the highest it’s been in going on four seasons in Boston; his strikeouts per nine innings are the lowest they’ve been since 2015. To make matters w...

Which Of The NFL's Five Holdouts Has The Most Leverage?
The NFL’s current collective bargaining agreement has largely made training camp holdouts a thing of the past. By codifying significant daily fines, docking a regular-season game check for each preseason game missed, and placing limitations on the accrual of service time toward free agency, this CB...

The Three-Way Trevor Bauer Trade Looks Pretty Good For Everyone
The Trevor Bauer trade was at least a little overshadowed, because within minutes of the news breaking, one of its major pieces was involved in a big ol’ brawl. Understandable, but it really is a fascinating trade that confounded expectations and may have made the Indians—ostensible sellers here—an ...

Yasiel Puig Involved In Massive Reds Brawl Within Moments Of Being Traded To Indians
Literally as I was hitting publish on a blog about Trevor Bauer being fined for a meltdown, and how it might’ve been his final act as a member of the Cleveland Indians, Bauer was traded by the Cleveland Indians. I did that! Sadly, Bauer was not traded to the New York Mets. Even more sadly, he was tr...

Derek Jeter Has Enemies In The Hall Of Fame
One of Derek Jeter’s first items of business upon taking over ownership of the Marlins in 2017—a priority so important to him that it was carried out before Jeter had officially taken over—was the sacking of virtually every other big baseball name in the upper ranks of the organization. The house-cl...

The Team USA Rejections Are Getting Grim
The FIBA World Cup has only drawn closer since Monday, and Team USA’s prospects have only gotten drearier. The players’ excuses are starting to increasingly resemble ones that might be used to beg out of a coworker’s birthday party....

There's Nothing More Embarrassing Than Being Picked Off By A Dude In Full Joker Face Paint
No quarterback wants to throw an interception, but Jonathon Jennings of the CFL’s Ottawa Redblacks endured a special indignity in Thursday’s game, when he tossed a first-quarter pick to an opponent who was freaking twisted. Jennings’ errant pass was snagged by Calgary Stampeders cornerback Robertson...

Maybe The Yankees Should Not Allow Masahiro Tanaka To Face The Red Sox
Yankees pitcher Masahiro Tanaka got the start Thursday night in the first game of an important four-game series against the Red Sox. The series probably has more juice for the Red Sox than for the Yankees—the Red Sox sound like they might be a couple bad days away from shifting into seller mode as t...

Steve Ballmer Appears To Be In Heat While Introducing Kawhi Leonard And Paul George
The Los Angeles Clippers held an introductory press conference today for new players Paul George and Kawhi Leonard. Also on stage was team owner Steve Ballmer, known for being shiny, red, and het up while courtside at his team’s games. In a sense, this is charming: Ballmer’s one of the team owners w...

Rays Put Pitcher At First Base, Nearly Destroy The Tender Fabrics That Hold Together The Game Of Baseball
A crucial AL East game between the Rays and the Red Sox ground to a screeching halt in the eighth inning on Wednesday afternoon after the Rays pulled some lineup shenanigans with their relief pitchers. Lefty Adam Kolarek got the first out in the inning, at which point the Rays brought in right-hande...