red Page 369 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
All Right, Maybe It's Time To Panic
OK, we have clearly attempted to keep our wits about us during this whole Albert Pujols injury situation ... but we're officially out on the ledge now....
The Closer: Yankees; Dangerous When Wounded
Notes from a day in baseball:...
Sean Taylor Free To Visit All Kinds Of DJs Now
One of our favorite, quietly sublime stories of the last couple months involved Washington Redskins safety Sean Taylor and his battle with a prosecutor who worked as a DJ in his spare time. (His MySpace page included the immortal self-description as a bulging-biceps, headphones-wearing prosecutor ...
...And The Sex Boat Sails Out Of Our Lives
It looks like we may be officially closing the cabin door on the Minnesota sex boat incident. Both Bryant McKinnie and Fred Smoot pleaded guilty yesterday to disorderly conduct and being a public nuisance on a watercraft. They'll both get fines and community service. And here's a nice quote from t...
Bronson Arroyo, Rockin' Pitchman
Initially, though we were happy about the Bronson Arroyo to Cincinnati trade, we worried that the harsh transition to "rollicking Boston nightlife" to "downtown closes at midnight" would cause some trouble for the rocking righthander. Clearly, though, it's all worked out well, so much so that now he...
You Know Schilling Plays Against Himself As Soon As The Game's Over
As you might have heard already, Red Sox legend/blowhard Curt Schilling loves video games so much that he had a video character of himself created for the game Everquest II. (Photo from Boston Dirt Dogs. If you defeat him, Sony donates money to the ALS foundation....
The David Wells Mad Lib
Obviously, David Wells — as evidenced by his appearance on the waiver wire in just about every fantasy league we're in — is much more useful as a quote machine these days than as an actual baseball player. And he's never more amusing than when he's being edited to suit the taste of the delicate ne...
The Closer: Fate, Thy Name Is Josh Beckett
Notes from a day in baseball:...
The Closer: How Griffey Got His Groove Back
Notes from a day in baseball:...
The Closer: Sunny Days In The Queen City
Notes from a day of baseball: • 1. Clerical Mixup Has Reds In First. Hmmm, wasn't Cincinnati scheduled to suck this season? We know it's early, and there's a three-way tie up there, but the Reds are in first place in the NL Central, bringing back memories of those great teams in the '70s featurin...
The Closer: Fear The Awesome Hitting Might Of Mark Mulder
Notes from a day of baseball. • 1. Mulder Gets A Little Raucous During Housewarming Party. When they said that the new Busch Stadium would be a pitcher's ballpark, we didn't know they meant it this way. Cardinals starter Mark Mulder clubbed his first career home run on Monday, right over the new H...
Game 6, RBI Baseball Style
If you needed any more proof that the Web is the greatest thing humans have been handed since we realized the caveman who won’t shut up about his fantasy baseball team could be hit in the head with a rock, here it is. A guy at the site San Diego Serenade spent hours syncing up Vin Scully’s audio fro...
The Closer: Bronx Cheer
Notes from a day of baseball ... • 1. Well, That's Two. It was a headline in The New York Times that really bothered us: 'Yankees Rough Up Angels' Colon.' But they were refering to Bartolo Colon, of course, who got pounded by A-Rod & Co. 10-1 yesterday, and hey, the Yankees are off! After beating ...
That Was Not As Much Fun As It Should Have Been
Phil Mickelson is your 2006 Masters winner. There was no drama on 18, there was no big finish. The 18th was just a formality. Phil Mickelson bumrushed the field, or perhaps more accurately, let the field bumrush themselves, en route to an easy green jacket....
A Ponytail Unlike Any Other
For the moment, I'm going to ignore the people who would tell you that "The Masters doesn't start until the back nine on Sunday." I've been watching for almost an hour already, and there's no way that Miguel Angel Jimenez's fucking head is bothering me this much without the tournament having start...
Random YouTube Finding Of The Week
As always, it's amazing what you can find on YouTube....
Your AL East "Preview"
Obviously, the landscape of the American League East obviously changed dramatically yesterday, but we're gonna go ahead and try to forecast matters anyway. It's hard, but we must tredge forward, regardless. We must stay strong. Some bad predictions:...
Your NL Central "Preview"
Our personal favorite division has had a monotonous feel to it the last few years, with the Cardinals and the Astros advancing and meeting in the NLCS two consecutive times. (This, of course, is fine with us.) We also have a feeling that the NL Central is the only division in baseball with three ...
Spring Training Fights, Zapruder Style
If you can't get enough of some good spring training bench-clearing brawl action, Boston.com has your fix: A complete frame by frame deconstruction of the Julian Tavarez-Joey Gathwright scuffle earlier this week....