rist Page 63 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Hot Damn, Chelsea Just Bought Christian Pulisic For A Shit-Ton Of Money
The rumor mill has been in overdrive these past few weeks about Christian Pulisic’s future, and today we got official confirmation of a move that still feels a little shocking: Premier League giants Chelsea have purchased the artist formally known as America’s Wonderteen from Borussia Dortmund for a...
Christmas Candy Vs. Halloween Candy: Who Ya Got?!
Today we’re talking about groomzillas, NFL bye weeks, Olive Garden, shitty teams, and more....
<i>A Christmas Story</i> Subplots, Ranked
Christmas feels incomplete without at least four-to-six partial viewings of A Christmas Story, Bob Clark’s 1983 movie based on Jean Shepherd’s semi-autobiographical stories. By now, if you have a heart, you’ve seen each segment and running subplot dozens of times. But which are the best? And which a...
Doug Christie Was Pretty Horny For This Steph Curry Crossover
Just two days removed from a 20-point loss to the Kawhi-less Toronto Raptors, the Golden State Warriors were looking for a bounce-back win against the up-and-coming Sacramento Kings. Thanks to the efforts of Steph Curry, Kevin Durant and Klay Thompson—who combined for 95 points—they were able to fen...
Paulo Dybala Learns What It's Like To Play With Cristiano Ronaldo
Here is what would’ve been Paulo Dybala’s equalizing wondergoal in the last seconds of Juventus’s 2-1 loss to Young Boys in the Champions League yesterday, if only the referee hadn’t ruled it out for Cristiano Ronaldo’s offside interference, which maybe/probably wouldn’t have been called had Ronaldo...
Kawhi Leonard Has No Time For Your Damn Holiday Cheer
This is so good. A reporter in the scrum ahead of tonight’s Raptors-Clippers game thought it would be a good idea to ask the famously loquacious and good-humored Kawhi Leonard to recall his favorite Christmas memory. Kawhi’s answer is just the most curmudgeonly thing....
Cristiano Ronaldo Is Glad He No Longer Plays With Selfish Assholes Like Cristiano Ronaldo
Cristiano Ronaldo obviously loves himself some Cristiano Ronaldo. But you know who Cristiano Ronaldo doesn’t love? Teammates who act like Cristiano Ronaldo....
The Knicks Are Patting Frank Ntilikina's Head And Telling Him To Wait Over Here While Mommy Rings The Convent Doorbell
To the surprise of not one single person on earth, a Knicks team missing Kristaps Porzingis and giving major rotation minutes to all of Tim Hardaway Jr., Mario Hezonja, and Emmanuel Mudiay sucks major ass and is losing lots of games. They’ve dropped two in a row and four of five, and they’ve got the...
Ronaldo's Sisters Should Probably Chill Out
After Real Madrid’s Luka Modric won the Ballon d’Or yesterday, becoming the first person not named Lionel Messi or Cristiano Ronaldo to earn the award since 2007, Ronaldo’s sisters were extremely salty about it....
The Sabres Are The Hottest And Most Stressful Team In The NHL<em></em>
The Buffalo Sabres—yeah, the Sabres, worst team in the league last season—just keep on winning, and they did it again Tuesday night. After a scoreless opening half hour, the Sabres got out to a 2-0 lead against the Sharks at home with a couple of slick scores. But in the final 10 minutes of the thir...
Dabo Swinney Ruins Fat Guy Touchdown Moment
It took two tries for Christian Wilkins to get his fat guy touchdown against South Carolina on Saturday. The first attempt came on a third-and-goal from the two and was snuffed out by the Gamecocks defense. Dabo Swinney decided that the one-yard line was as good a place as any to go for it on fourth...
The Responsible Adult's Guide To Boozing Around The Holidays
The holidays are here. It may not sink in for you until you’ve heard “Silver Bells” for the umpteenth time at a bar festooned with mistletoe and Christmas lights, or until you notice your weird boss sweating and swaying after one-too-many scotch and sodas, but yeah, the holidays are here. So how do ...
David Fizdale Doesn't Want To Be Tempted By Visions Of A Healthy Kristaps Porzingis
As the Knicks head coach, David Fizdale has been a blessing. He’s gotten creative with his lineups; he’s giving the youth plenty of burn; and he’s not trying to win now with the likes of Lance Thomas and Enes Kanter. He’s taking the long view. So long is his view that Fizdale is not even willing to ...
![Nine Months After ACL Surgery, Kristaps Porzingis Still Can't Run [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/ktzxvb2hovbsavydngqr.jpg)
Nine Months After ACL Surgery, Kristaps Porzingis Still Can't Run [Update]
New York Knicks coach David Fizdale provided a very bleak update today about the status of team centerpiece Kristaps Porzingis, who hasn’t played since he tore his ACL in a game against the Bucks on Feb. 6 last season. Even after nine months of recovery, Porzingis still isn’t fully able to run, and—...
Radio Host Craig Carton Found Guilty Of Fraud, Faces 45 Years In Prison
Former WFAN host Craig Carton, who pled not guilty to fraud charges after he was arrested last September for scamming investors out of millions of dollars through a concert ticket-selling enterprise in order to pay off his gambling debts, was found guilty on all charges today, the New York Post repo...
Christian Pulisic Went Off Today
An update on Christian Pulisic, American superstar: he is still extremely good at soccer. Today, in a DFB Pokal win over Union Berlin, he had a goal, an assist, a drawn game-winning penalty, and whatever this shit this move was. ...
This Weekend Is The First <i>Clásico</i> Of The Rest Of Our Lives
The defining feature of the past decade of international soccer has been the enduring struggle of two opposing forces: Lionel Messi vs. Cristiano Ronaldo, Barcelona vs. Real Madrid. Two of the very best soccer players to ever live, their abilities maximized to the fullest extent possible thanks to m...
Hell Yeah, Clemson Scored A Fat Man Touchdown
The 1985 Chicago Bears waited until they were up 34 points on the New England Patriots in the second half of Super Bowl XX before calling William “The Refrigerator” Perry’s number to score a one-yard touchdown. This season’s Clemson Tigers made the call a little sooner than that in a game with lower...
Juventus President Says He Divined Cristiano Ronaldo's Innocence By Looking Into His Eyes
If you were hoping that, with the benefit of hindsight, Juventus might have come to regret their gross and tone-deaf defense of Cristiano Ronaldo on the heels of Kathryn Mayorga going public with her claim that Ronaldo raped her, well, we have some bad news for you....
All Three Defendants In College Basketball Corruption Trial Found Guilty
This afternoon, a jury ruled that former Adidas consultant Merl Code, Adidas employee James Gatto, and former financial adviser Christian Dawkins were guilty of a series of wire fraud charges stemming from their work orchestrating schemes to pay Adidas money to college basketball players in order to...