san Page 464 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Jinxing Clayton Kershaw
Clayton Kershaw no-hitting Marlins... (UPDATE: oops.)[SI]...

Lakets. Rockers. Game 7 Open Thread.
Will Kobe take this series back? Will Ron Artest lick his neck? Will Luis Scola's swarthy musk be too much for the Lakers too handle? Find out which of these brave competitors will earn the right to be defeated by the Nuggets. [Yahoo]...

Sports League Built On Backs Of Gamblers Makes Token Effort To Stop Sports Gambling in Delaware
So it appears the Delaware sports betting bill will be signed into law later this week. And, on cue, the NFL is making a big production of being outraged....

Skip Bayless Gets A Formal Philadelphia Evisceration
This is probably one instance where the "Media Meltdown" tag has never been more apt: ESPN's Skip Bayless gets destroyed on-air by Philadelphia sports radio host Mike Missanelli. Enjoy the carnage....

Getting To Know Kim Singletary
Yeah, this is an interesting comment: "But Kim had never envisioned herself in an interracial relationship. She kept thinking, 'I'd sure like to meet someone like him who is white.' [SBB]...

Introducing Your New Deadspinner
Hi. I’m the new guy. Nice to make your acquaintance....

Just Give Your Car Keys To Aaron Brooks And He'll Park It For You
Either the Houston Rockets veterans had a little fun with Aaron Brooks this weekend or he forgot to bring his ventriloquist dummy to the post-game press conference....

Rockets and Lakers: It's About To Get Nasty
After losing yet another starter, the Rockets are about to try to prove that they can win without Yao. If Ron Artest can keep himself from getting ejected, they might have a shot....

Top Draft Prospect About To Get Paid
Top draft prospect Stephen Strasburg pitched a 17 K, no hitter in his last home game at San Diego State. Expect the Nationals to draft him before getting anally raped by his agent, Scott Boras....

Real Men Swing Pink Bats
MLB is breaking out pink bats again in honor of Mother's Day and to support breast cancer awareness. To promote early screening, doctors will be giving a lifetime of free mammograms to Arod and Manny....

There Is Another Sanchez Living Inside Mark Sanchez's Mouth
New York media, please be on high alert: It turns out the man drafted to save the Jets' franchise from the ghost of Favre and the incompetence of Clemens/Ratliff allegedly is lip- inked and loves doggy-style....

A Note From The Guest Editor
Greetings from Los Angeles, the charming little front-running town that just suffered a devastating cockpunch from a left-fielder who's being unfairly persecuted for his totally innocent use of a female fertility drug....

Bill Plaschke Finally Vindicated By Manny Ramirez Suspension
There is a silver lining to be found in this Manny Ramirez mess—L.A. Times columnist Bill Plaschke can finally say "I told you so!" Manny duped a lot of people, but not this guy!...

Manny Ramirez Releases His Statement On Suspension
Manny Ramirez released a statement [opens in PDF] saying that the positive test comes from a medication that was prescribed to him by a doctor for a legitimate medical issue. [Los Angeles Times]...

Richard Sandomir And Stefan Fatsis Talk Mock Brackets And MILFs
Another three-man Deadcast this week, featuring best-selling author Stefan Fatsis and NYT sports media editor Richard Sandomir....

Sasha Cohen Is Here To Save America's Gold
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

Ron Artest Once Saw A Guy Get Stabbed In The Heart (UPDATE: For Real)
The NBA Playoffs are getting very chippy—even more so—but at least no one has been murdered on court with a broken table leg yet. Because Ron Artest would hate to see that happen....again....

Look Who's Here, Everyone. It's Barry Bonds!
In today's episode of "Everybody Loves Barry," the semi-retired slugger pays a visit to his old home, gets a standing ovation, and explains that evil jerk side of his brain—that's just a character he plays!...

So Much For That San Jose Dynasty
After dominating the first part of this season and then holding off Detroit to snag the best record in the league, the Sharks really thought that this was their year. Yeah, not exactly....