sat Page 20 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Fox 8 News Provided Us With Both Gloria James's Police Booking And On-Court Attack Videos Free Of Charge
Poor Gloria. Gloria just wanted her car, and Gloria just wanted some kid to foul her son like a considerate human being. We now have this Queen James highlight reel, thanks to the sharing souls at WJW Fox 8 News in Cleveland: Gloria's booking video at the Miami Beach Police Department, accompanied...
They're Still Playing "Friday" At NHL Games, And At Least One Grown Man Is Enjoying It
We know that internet memes generally have a very particular shelf life, and we respect that Rebecca Black's "Friday" phenomenon might have worn out its welcome by now. When we first posted the video to accompany another meme, it had 200,000 views; it now has 61 million views and a dedicated Tumbl...
Was Scott Howard Actually Better Than Teen Wolf? A Statistical Investigation
This is Regressing, a numbers-minded column by our clever friends at the Harvard College Sports Analysis Collective. Over the past week, they've been applying rigorous statistical analysis to some of the finest basketball movies in the history of cinema (and also Hoosiers). The series concludes wi...
Calculating The Fresh Prince Of Bel Air's Usage Rate, And What It Can Tell Us About Ball Hogs
This is Regressing, a numbers-minded column by our clever friends at the Harvard College Sports Analysis Collective. Over the next few days, they'll be applying rigorous statistical analysis to some of the finest basketball movies in the history of cinema (and also Hoosiers). Today we have some b...
It’d Take Trey Parker A Million Years To Lose, And Other Statistical Oddities Of <em>BASEketball</em>
This is Regressing, a numbers-minded column by our clever friends at the Harvard College Sports Analysis Collective. Over the next few days, they'll be applying rigorous statistical analysis to some of the finest basketball movies in the history of cinema (and also Hoosiers). Today: The offensivel...
Compiling The Absurd Box Score For <em>Space Jam</em>; Or, Shawn Bradley Sucked Against Cartoons, Too
This is Regressing, a numbers-minded column by our clever friends at the Harvard College Sports Analysis Collective. Over the next few days, they'll be applying rigorous statistical analysis to some of the finest basketball movies in the history of cinema (and also Hoosiers). Today: Space Jam by t...
Donald Sterling Has Seized The "Guy Who Hates Cancer Patients" Label
Several tipsters took it upon themselves to point out a story about then-Los Angeles Clippers assistant coach Kim Hughes's battle with prostate cancer, and how the necessary surgery wasn't covered by the team's medical-insurance plan. There were plenty of stories and posts about it this week. In on...
An Advanced Statistical Analysis Of Jimmy Chitwood's Basketball Performance In <em>Hoosiers</em>
This is Regressing, a numbers-minded column by our clever friends at the Harvard College Sports Analysis Collective. Over the next few days, they'll be applying rigorous statistical analysis to some of the finest basketball movies in the history of cinema (and also Hoosiers). Today: Calculating Ji...
Sabres Fans Tortured With Rebecca Black's "Friday"
If you haven't seen and laughed at this video yet, I don't think we can be Internet friends anymore. But a meme does not an arena anthem make; that's why it was so curious when our Buffalo correspondent texted to let us know that during last night's game against Carolina, the Sabres played "Friday...
TV Station Comps Lenny Dykstra $2,500 In Food And Jewels After He Compares Himself To Gandhi
Lenny Dykstra's coat-tailing of Charlie Sheen has almost become as annoying as everything else Sheen (after a very good run, though). But the aftermath of Nails's wholly impressive interview with the NBC affiliate in Philly the other night continues resonating beyond his choice words about winning ...
Todd Bairstow Was Living The Fishing-Trip Dream Until He Got Death Rolled
If your worst nightmare involves a fishing trip in which you lose a finger to a gator that gets you in a death roll after latching onto leg for 40-some minutes, catch up with 28-year-old Australian mine worker Todd Bairstow sometime. He can tell you how it really feels....
Report: Many Dallas Athletes Run Shoddy Charities
As Jerry Jones prepares to host two teams playing for a Super Bowl title, the Dallas Morning News does God's work in declaring that local stars aren't as philanthropic as they'd have you believe....
Surprisingly Congruous When You Think About It Mixtape Theater: Barry Sanders
Welcome to Surprisingly Congruous When You Think About It Mixtape Theater. Today's entry: Lions great Barry Sanders set to Clint Mansell & The Kronos Quartet's overture from the Requiem For A Dream soundtrack....
This Is What It Looks Like When Sneaky Machines Practice Rising Up
CBC Sports announcers Scott Oakes and Kevin Weekes almost got run over by a Zamboni before the San Jose Sharks/Edmonton Oilers game last night. Here's video of it. (HT Greg Wyshynski)...
Toddler Dies After Fall From Staples Center Luxury Suite
A two-year old boy died last night after sustaining injuries in a fall from a luxury suite after the Warriors-Lakers game at the Staples Center....
Incongruous Athlete Mix-Tape Theater: Billy Paultz
Welcome back to Incongruous Athlete Mix-Tape Theater. Today's subject: Billy "The Whopper" Paultz, set to some folk music that sounds simultaneously Mexican and Celtic....
Relive Zenyatta's Breathtaking Run
It is with a heavy sigh of relief that we can report Zenyatta did not have to be euthanized following her run in the Breeder's Cup Classic. She finished 2nd, but it was one of the greatest finishes we've ever seen....
Incongruous Athlete Mix-Tape Theater: Pape Sy
Welcome to Incongruous Athlete Mix-Tape Theater, the occasional feature wherein we examine fan-made video love letters to athletes and their wildly inappropriate soundtracks. It's been a while, but we're back with a doozy: Atlanta Hawks rookie Pape Sy set to some opera....
Letter Chiding Baylor Students For Clogging Plumbing System With Semen Is Too Good To Be True, Alas
According to an anonymous tipster, the residence halls at Baylor were recently clogged with semen, leading to this desperate plea from one residence hall's director. Sadly, it's a fake, as our brief conversation with the hilariously put-upon director confirmed....
The Imperfect Man Pitched A Perfect Game, Lost His Pants
Welcome to Private Stache, an occasional feature in which Andy Gray, keeper of Sports Illustrated's indispensable Vault, spotlights the sports photography of yesteryear, a time when athletes wore short shorts and facial hair, and everyone looked vaguely uncomfortable....