scream Page 143 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Luis Suárez Is Back And He's Coming To Devour The World
It feels a little weird saying this about a known shithead, but we can't help but appreciate how Luis Suárez's hard work on the pitch is finally resulting in the goals his play has deserved. But even in the face of criticism earlier in the season, as Suárez struggled to mesh perfectly with his new B...
MLS Players And Owners Agree To Keep League Mired In Mediocrity
We're still in the process of digesting last night's surprise CBA accord between MLS and its players. Until or unless we get to dig into the specifics, it'll be difficult to judge exactly how the new agreement will affect those involved. Of course, the specifics will mainly be of interest for those ...
MLS And Players Union Reach Agreement. What Does It Mean, And Who Won?
Twenty-four hours after it looked like a work stoppage was inevitable—and 48 hours before the beginning of the season—Major League Soccer and the Major League Soccer Players Union announced that they had reached a tentative deal on a new collective bargaining agreement. Here are the highlights o...
Yawn: Just Another Unbelievable Messi Pass For Neymar To Chip Home
Jeez, we get it guys, you three Barcelona forwards can score whenever you want. But how many times this season have we seen the ball go from Suárez to Messi to the Twilight Zone to Neymar and into the net? Maybe switch it up once or twice. You know, for our sake....
All Signs Pointing To MLS Work Stoppage
As became evident almost immediately into talks for a new MLS collective bargaining agreement, the biggest issue of contention was always going to be free agency. If reports from the less-than-conciliatory negotiating table are to be believed, it's not looking good for Friday's planned season kick...
Adam Johnson Arrested, Allegedly Had Sex With 15-Year-Old Girl: Report
According to numerous reports out of England, Sunderland winger Adam Johnson was arrested today by Durham Police on suspicion of having sex with a 15-year-old girl. A Durham Police spokesperson would only tell news outlets that "a 27-year-old man was arrested earlier today on suspicion of sexual act...
Why I Love Coutinho, And How Real Madrid's Slip Gives Us A Great<i> Clásico</i>
With the fireworks of the last few days, it would be natural to look down the sights and champ at how those results set up a couple blockbuster head-to-head matchups in the coming weeks. But let's take a second to look back and appreciate what we saw this weekend, which was magnificent....
Happy Borussia Dortmund Celebrate Goal Batman And Robin Style
Borussia Dortmund players are happy again! Today's 3-0 victory over Schalke was their fourth straight in the Bundesliga, dragging themselves from the relegation zone to ninth in the table. Since they're finally confident that they'll actually score some goals, they're planning out elaborate costum...
Racist Dutch Soccer Fans Throw Inflatable Banana At Black Player (Update)
Feyenoord fans continue to expose themselves as douche bags of the highest order. First it was trashing Rome before the first leg of their Europa League tie against Roma, then it was threatening further shenanigans ahead of the return leg, and now they've gone ahead and gotten racist....
Chelsea To Fans: Guys, Please Don't Be Racist This Weekend
In contrast to the sentiment expressed by some fans in Paris last week, Chelsea feel that, though some of their fans may be racist, that is definitely not the way they like it. In light of this and this weekend's opponent, the club is threatening to come down hard on any supporters caught being raci...
Hulk Can Score Rocket Goals With Either Foot
Hulk hammered home a long-range rocket today against PSV in Europa League action, and while we've featured plenty of the Zenit St. Petersburg striker's heroics around here, we'd like to note that today's feat came off his right, and supposedly weaker, foot. ...
FIFA Takes 2021 Confederations Cup Away From Qatar
In a tough-yet-fair decision by an organization known for them, FIFA has decided to strip Qatar of hosting privileges for the 2021 Confederations Cup. In explaining the group's reasoning, FIFA secretary general Jérôme Valcke revealed something no one had previously considered: Qatari summers are way...
No-Good, Terrible Defending Gives Monaco Commanding Lead On Arsenal
"Hey Gunners," Dimitar Berbatov said with a wry grin, wheeling away towards the corner flag after some shockingly terrible defending sent the former Spurs and Red Devil striker free on goal to put Monaco up 2-0, "remember me?"...
Damn, Man, Tim Howard Is Having One Sad-Ass Season
It's been less than a year since Tim Howard became America's World Cup hero, staring down an unrelenting Belgian attack and turning away 16 goddamn shots with the grim resolve of an action hero who's low on ammo. In fact, go ahead and watch each one of those beautiful, thrilling saves one more time....
Dutch Hooligans Who Tore Up Rome Somehow Even Dumber Than You Thought
Remember those crazy Feyenoord fans who turned up in Rome ahead of their team's Europa League clash with Roma? The ones who seemed more concerned with tearing the city down before the match than with the game itself? Yeah, well they're getting ready for round two....
Goalkeeper Hops Into Stands To Throw Hands With Fan
Way down in the bowels of England's soccer pyramid lies the Isthmian League and teams like Kingstonian and Bognor Regis. This is the realm where players play for the love of the game, and fans attend for the love of the drink. Occasionally, the two sides collide....
This Barcelona Goal Has Manchester City Defenders Looking Like Children
Much has been made of Barcelona, who, though still dope as hell, are diminished from the time a few years back when they were invincible, and Luis Suárez, who is no longer the best player on his own team, let alone in the league. But Barcelona and Suárez are back in England today against Manchester ...
Even The Big European Powers Can't Stop The Winter World Cup In Qatar
As the tides of progress surge on, even Europe realizes its powerlessness in the face of Qatar's insistence on making the 2022 World Cup the first to be held in the winter, thus wrecking the domestic leagues' seasons. Our last hope for sanity to prevail—a defiant UEFA protecting its own highly-profi...
Soccer Fans Resist Urge To Be Hateful Assholes For Once
Soccer fans are, almost without exception, horrible people. So you can imagine our surprise, if also our reluctance to truly trust, the behavior of these Stuttgart fans, who consoled poor little Timo Baumgartl after a huge mistake lead to an easy goal to all but seal their defeat....
Angry Soccer Player Body Slams His Opponent
Worcester City's Shab Khan—they play in Conference North, the sixth tier of English soccer—objected to a foul from Stockport County's Charlie Russell, and decided that the proper way to express his displeasure was to body slam Russell. You'll be shocked to learn that Khan earned himself a red card. ...