scream Page 152 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Xabi Alonso Forced To Apologize To Ronaldo For Stupid, Fake Controversy
Remember that dumb story Real Madrid pitched to their stooges at Marca yesterday, where some milquetoast statements of Xabi Alonso's were folded, kneaded, and ultimately transformed into direct insults to former teammates Cristiano Ronaldo and Iker Casillas? Well, it worked....
Shitty Swiss Team Cuts 11 Players After Youth Team Blows Them Out 10-0
FC Grenchen, of Switzerland's fourth division, suck at soccer. In their last nine matches, they've collected all of zero points while shipping 66—yes, 66—goals, 10 of which came at the feet of FC Luzern's youth squad. Following that horrific result, Grenchen's sporting director decided to cut 11 pla...
Meet <em>Marca</em>, The Hilarious Propaganda Arm Of Real Madrid
It's maybe a little difficult for Americans to grasp just how deeply and blatantly in the tank the European press can be for the local XI. And no one is deeper and more blatantly in the tank for the local XI than the media in Spain, where the local XI means either Barcelona and Real Madrid and where...
Wigan Owner Doubles Down On New Manager's Racism And Antisemitism
Wigan Athletic courted controversy this week by hiring Malky Mackay, who is under investigation by the FA for assorted bigoted and offensive text messages that were sent more than a year ago but came to light over the summer. Wigan owner Dave Whelan spoke with the Guardian today, and offered a defen...
DC Comics Claims Valencia's New Crest Looks Too Much Like Batman Logo
Holy intellectual property law, Batman, why are you beefing with this Spanish soccer team?...
French Club Suspected Of Bribing Opponents With Cases Of Wine Mid-Match
French officials have arrested the club presidents of newly promoted Ligue 1 side Caen and Ligue 2 club Nîmes for their suspected involvement in fixing a match at the end of last year's Ligue 2 season. What did the Caen players receive for their services? According to one report, cases of wine deliv...
Despots, Serial Killers, And Dick Jokes: <em>Football Manager</em>'s Banned Names
From the sheer number of funny names assigned to the randomly generated players in Football Manager, you may have assumed there is no filter on name combinations. And while you may have seen a "Willy Pinas" or two, you haven't seen a "Adolf Hitler," "Tim McVeigh," or a "Dick Licka" for a good reas...
Italy-Croatia Euro Qualifier Suspended After Burning Flares And Rioting
Riot police fought with soccer fans as a flood of flares landed upon the field and forced a temporary suspension of play in Milan at today's Euro 2016 qualifier between Italy and Croatia....
German Football League Threatens FIFA Over Unreleased World Cup Report
FIFA finally released a summary of their report into the bidding process for the 2018 and 2022 World Cups, and to the surprise of absolutely nobody it basically cleared Qatar, Russia, and current FIFA officials of any wrongdoing. The 42-page report was written by FIFA ethics committee judge Hans-Joa...
Argentine Club President Runs Up In Players' Homes 40 Deep, Robs Them
Jorge Abib is the club president of Argentina's Textil Mandiyú. He is insane. Why, just last night, multiple Textil players accused a possibly drugged-up Abib of rolling up to the players' apartment building with around 40 club ultras, busting into dozens of rooms, and breaking everything in sight w...
Carlos Bacca Scores Colombian Equalizer, Sparks Heavy Metal Meltdown
We highlighted Javier "El Cantante del Gol" Fernández's goal calls throughout the World Cup, and we're happy to bring you his especially-emphatic call of Carlos Bacca's equalizer against the United States today at Craven Cottage. (Sure looks like Colombia was offside here, though?)...
Fat Ronaldo May Be Fat, But He Can Still Jump Really High
While it's perhaps a little surprising that a man can exercise, as Fat/Real Ronaldo is depicted doing in the Vine below, and maintain a gut like that, it isn't a shock to see that one of the greatest players ever still has enough hops to clear 113cm with a standing jump:...
Chart: The Average Player Salaries In Soccer Leagues Around The World
A lot of what we talk about when we compare different soccer leagues, from arguing which one's the best to which one's the deepest and even which plays the most attractive style, comes down to how much money is spent on players. In that sense, this Sportsmail chart listing the average salaries of pl...
MLS Is Still Pissed Off At Jürgen Klinsmann
It was obvious at the time that MLS commissioner Don Garber's tirade against Jürgen Klinsmann last month was about much more than the innocuous statements they were ostensibly in response to. Sure enough, ESPN FC is reporting that MLS bigwigs remain "irate" at Klinsmann—this time for what they see a...
UMBC's Kay Banjo Pulls Off A Beautiful Backheel Goal
Who's clamoring for an America East soccer highlight? We've got you covered. UMBC's Kay Banjo knocked in a gorgeous backheel goal in Wednesday's semi-final against the Vermont Catamounts. Credit to teammate Jordan Becker for the accurate cross....
Chelsea And Spain Are Locked In A Dumb War Neither Can Win
Even by the standards of dick-measuring contests, the one ongoing between Chelsea and the Spanish national team has been awful for months. At some point, though, this sort of thing stops being merely dumb and threatens to become actually harmful to the players each side should be trying to protect—a...
Coca-Cola Supports Slavery
Someone should do something about the human rights catastrophe that is the 2022 World Cup! Qatari authorities, for example, are reportedly using North Korean slave labor to build infrastructure in preparation for the event. If only someone would put enough pressure on them, maybe they would not use ...
New York FC's New Kits Look Like Hand-Me-Down Manchester City Ones
A league of hand-me-down players wearing hand-me-down jerseys? Sounds about right....
How To Dumbfound Two Defenders With One Dribble, By Brazil's Willian
You see this little move right here, where Willian drags the ball one way with the outside of his boot, before that lightning-quick flick of the foot in the other direction, nudging the ball in the opposite direction of where he was moving while completely freezing the two Turkish defenders? Yeah,...