si Page 495 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Premier League Votes To Close Transfer Window Before Season Begins
After much discussion about the relative pros and cons of the strategy, Premier League teams have reached an agreement today that, starting next year, the league’s summer transfer window will close the day before the season starts....

Red Sox Bosses Don't Like It When You Call Them To Chat About The Team's Sign-Stealing Scheme<em></em>
This morning, a day after news broke that the Red Sox allegedly used technology to steal signs from the Yankees, I called up executives from both teams to ask about how the smartwatch-assisted, sign-stealing operation came to be and what they thought would and should happen next....

NFL Concludes Useless Probe Into Whether Tom Brady Had Concussions
In May, supermodel Gisele Bündchen said in an interview that her husband, Patriots quarterback Tom Brady, “does have concussions.” This spurred a joint investigation by the NFL and NFLPA, which has unsurprisingly come to the conclusion that Tom Brady is just fine....

ESPN Radio Host Ryen Russillo Returns To Work, Talks About His Arrest And Suspension
Ryen Russillo, host of The Russillo Show on ESPN, returned to his program today for the first time since he was arrested on Aug. 23 in Wyoming after he allegedly entered someone else’s condo in the early hours, refused to leave, and ended up with no pants. ...

UFC Vet Diego Brandão Flips Out, Incites Garbage Storm, Leaps Out Of Cage
Brazilian mixed martial artist Diego Brandão has been fighting with Russian MMA promotion Fight Nights Global this year, since the UFC released him from his contract after he allegedly pistol-whipped someone outside of an Albuquerque strip club in April 2016. He once headlined a UFC event against Co...

Reconsider The Lobster
ROCKLAND, Maine—The New Hampshire/Maine split on I-95 in Portsmouth, N.H., is unpredictable. Sometimes you’re able to breeze through to your final destination—back to your shit hole of a dorm room in Durham, or off to the Kittery Trading Post to buy a crossbow and a bottle of deer piss—but other tim...

Pittsburgh Pirates Try To Justify Giving Away Effective Reliever For Free
Reliever Juan Nicasio has been having a career-best season; in his second year with the Pirates, he’s striking out nearly 25 percent of batters with a 2.85 ERA. This week, Pittsburgh placed him on irrevocable waivers to let Philadelphia take him for absolutely nothing in return, so that, uh, they co...

Slavery-Supporting Nation's Propaganda Arm Buys Kylian Mbappé In Super Shady Transfer
Qatar is a loathsome county built on corruption, a labor system that closely resembles slavery, and the support of the murder of innocent people through the financial backing of terrorists. Qatar is also the owner of French club Paris Saint-Germain, the country’s luxurious and extravagantly gilded s...

Jonathon Simmons Details Escape From Hurricane Harvey
Jonathon Simmons, who spent two productive seasons with the San Antonio Spurs before signing with the Orlando Magic this summer, is a Houston native, and he was in town when Hurricane Harvey hit. Like millions of other South Texas residents, he was forced to evacuate his home due to the flooding cau...

Just What In The Goddamn Hell Are Barcelona Doing In The Transfer Market?
Death, taxes, and Barcelona doing some fuck shit in the summer 2017 transfer window. These are the three constants in life, and boy does that last one keep reminding us of its omnipresence....

Alexandr Dolgopolov Gets Miffed At Match-Fixing Questions, Says He Doesn't Have Many Online Friends
Former top-20 player Alexandr Dolgopolov came under the scrutiny of tennis’s anti-corruption group last week because of strange betting patterns around one of his matches. The Tennis Integrity Unit tends to speak in generalities rather than naming particular contests, but when asked, a spokesperson ...

Are You Buying What Maria Sharapova Is Selling?<em></em>
Everything about Maria Sharapova’s first grand slam match since her April return from a 15-month doping ban was exaggerated. The venue: New York City’s Arthur Ashe stadium at night, tennis’s biggest, most electric stage. The opponent: world No. 2 defensive specialist Simona Halep, hungry for her f...

Illinois Athletics Director: I Love Our War Chant, But We're Getting Rid Of It For Some Reason
The University of Illinois announced today that they would stop their traditional practice of playing “war chant” music at athletic events, a decade after they discontinued the use of their Chief Illiniwek mascot at the NCAA’s behest. That should be a step in the right direction, or at least a step ...

Big Shocker: The Pelicans Will Enter The NBA Season Hobbled By Injuries
Raise your hand if you’ve heard this one before: an important Pelicans player has suffered a major injury, and the Pelicans are, as a result, screwed....

In Ousmane Dembélé, Barcelona Have Found A New Heir For Lionel Messi
At long last, some good news for FC Barcelona. Both Barça and Borussia Dortmund have now officially announced their agreement to send budding French superstar Ousmane Dembélé to Spain for a staggering fee that could reach as high as €145 million. And as far as news for Barça fans goes, this really c...

Conor McGregor Is Somehow Defending The Lineal WWE Brawl For All Title
Floyd Mayweather, Jr. is boxing Conor McGregor this weekend, and the whole thing is completely awesome. While the traditionalist fight press sees this simply as a capitalist exercise with an inevitable result and no titles on the line, that’s not exactly the case—at least not officially, that is....

Gylfi Sigurdsson Drops In A Goal From The Heavens
Oh man, this is some way to introduce yourself to your new fans. In only his second appearance for Everton, Gylfi Sigurdsson has just scored this insane blast from the middle of the park against Hajduk Split in a Europa League qualifying match:...

32 Paragraphs About 32 Teams: A Thinking Fan's Guide To The NFL Season
The following is excerpted from the team chapters of the always-excellent Football Outsiders Almanac. Buy it here as a PDF, or here in print....

Barcelona's Farcical Summer Of Discontent Slips Further Into Absurdity
Barcelona should be one of the most prestigious and respected institutions in world sports. This hallowed club should be capable of attracting and retaining the absolute best soccer players around the globe, operating with a dignity and professionalism befitting such a revered club in an era that in...
