si Page 571 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Former Russian Anti-Doping Chief Dead At 52
Nikita Kamayev, the former head of the Russian anti-doping agency RUSADA, died on Monday at the age of 52. “Presumably, the cause of death was a massive heart attack,” wrote RUSADA in a press release....
Barcelona Will Stomp On Your Throat And Make It Look Pretty As Hell
It will never be remembered, but this weekend’s Barcelona-Celta Vigo match, which finished 6-1 thanks to a Luis Suárez hat trick, a collection of stunning and inventive instances of Lionel Messi’s trademark magic, and a single iconic moment when Barcelona’s three world-conquering forwards took the i...
Why Your Children's Television Program Sucks: <i>PAW Patrol</i>
It’s time once again for our ongoing series surveying the awful shows you’re forced to endure before you can finally kick the kids out of the TV room to watch sports for eight hours....
So How Will The Skins Screw Things Up With Kirk Cousins?
One of the weirdest things to happen this NFL season was Kirk Cousins’s transformation from bad quarterback to “Hold on, Kirk Cousins might actually be kind of good?” This should be a good thing for Washington, which could use nothing more than to have a functional quarterback fall into its lap afte...
Messi Trick PK Sets Up Suárez Hat Trick
Barcelona were so bored with a second-half ass-kicking of Celta that they executed a trick penalty, with Lionel Messi dumping off to a sprinting Luis Suárez—who completed his hat trick with the goal. Cheeky? Disrespectful? Hilarious? All of the above....
DeMarcus Cousins Has The Quote Of All-Star Weekend
DeMarcus Cousins has an ugly game. He’s a pouting tornado of elbows and snarls, who tramples over opponents instead of going over or around them. He looks so mad on the court, so the second-time all-star is no doubt enjoying his time up in Toronto away from the Sacramento Kings Circus....
Louisiana Is Broke, And Now The Governor Is Threatening To Cancel LSU Football
Louisiana has no money. The state is currently operating with a $940 million budget deficit that is set to balloon to $2 billion in the next fiscal year. (Nola.com has a good breakdown of how the state got in such a dire position, but if you want the short answer, it’s that former governor Bobby Jin...
I’m Too Old To Enjoy The O.J. Simpson Renaissance
I was hanging out with a friend the other day when I mentioned that FX was gonna start airing a miniseries about the O.J. Simpson trial and he said to me, “I saw that, and I realized that, even after all these years, I’m still fucking sick to death of the whole thing.”...
Dan Fouts Made A Dumb CTE Joke About Boomer Esiason
Pretty much everybody missed this because nobody listens to the radio anymore, especially for the Super Bowl. But in the second quarter of the game Sunday, Westwood One analyst Dan Fouts made a stupid joke about Boomer Esiason having CTE when the former Bengals QB forgot in which game Peyton Manning...
Players Keep Complaining About Maryland's Under Armour Balls
Here’s a stupid fact about college basketball: The million-dollar sponsorship deals that schools sign with various apparel companies has created a sport in which there is no universal game ball. Nike schools use Nike balls, Adidas schools use Adidas balls, and so on....
Borussia Dortmund Fans Protest Ticket Prices By Raining Tennis Balls Onto Pitch
Like Liverpool fans, Borussia Dortmund supporters are also in the midst of a cold war against ticket pricing hikes. The German fans made their feelings perfectly evident yesterday by boycotting the first 20 minutes of the BVB-Stuttgart cup match, then interrupting the game by lobbing a bunch of tenn...
Hassan Whiteside Tossed For Elbowing Boban Marjanovic In The Head
Oh surprise, Heat center Hassan Whiteside is doing dirty things again. This time it’s elbowing gigantic Spurs center Boban Marjanovic in the head while the two were fighting for position: ...
Blake Griffin Suspended Four Games For Punching Out Equipment Staffer
The Los Angeles Clippers announced today that Blake Griffin will be suspended four games without pay, and fined an additional game check, for punching team equipment staffer Matias Testi....
How To Make A Kick-Ass Sazerac
I’ve never been to New Orleans and don’t know nearly as much as I should about its culture, but I do know Mardi Gras is upon us, and I know that’s good news. Again, not entirely certain what this festival entails—I gather it’s some kind of voodoo St. Patrick’s Day with better-looking celebrants and ...
"Maybe My Brain Wasn't As OK As I Thought It Was": Daniel Bryan Explains Concussions-Driven Retirement On <i>WWE Raw</i>
One of professional wrestling’s most popular performers shocked the community today when Daniel Bryan announced suddenly on Twitter that he was retiring, effective immediately. Tonight on Raw, Bryan told the Seattle audience—many of whom were seen openly weeping—that “I don’t want to be doing this a...
Bougie Food Review: Sipping Chocolate
One of the ongoing subplots of my adulthood is the daily realization that I am simply the product of my parents. Despite living on the opposite coast and not seeing them nearly enough, they are very present in the daily mundanities of my life. My mom used to drive me insane when insisting the dishwa...
5' 9" Isaiah Thomas Stuffs 6' 11" DeMarcus Cousins At The Rim
The Celtics scored approximately one million points in a defense-optional win over the Sacramento Kings this afternoon. Isaiah Thomas, now an all-star, turned 27 today and he celebrated by getting up there and swatting former teammate DeMarcus Cousins’ layup attempt. “Get that shit out!” indeed....
OK
Have something you think we should know? Email us at [email protected], or contact our writers directly, or use our SecureDrop system. You can also follow us on Twitter and like us on Facebook....
Why Is The NFL Giving More Super Bowl Ad Time To Its Favorite Sham Domestic-Violence Group?
I took the No More pledge last year. What do I have to show for it? I’m now very aware of when #NOMOREexcuses Law & Order: Special Victims Unit marathons are about to air, but that’s about it. I don’t know much more about domestic violence or sexual assault. I haven’t discovered new organizations wo...
GOP Candidates Offer Super Bowl Predictions In Meaningless, Waste-Of-Time Debate Question
Tonight’s GOP primary debate in New Hampshire has succeeded despite itself as candidates attack each other while ABC moderators stand by, barely acknowledging their non-answers to the question prompts. One of those questions? “Who’s going to win tomorrow’s Super Bowl?” (None of the candidates offere...