si Page 788 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
"Douche McGee" Got His (Or Her) Day In The Sun On SPEED
SPEED call-in show WindTunnel with Dave Despain is known for giving strongly-opinionated NASCAR fans a voice, and like many programs it's now featuring tweets from viewers. One such viewer, "Douche McGee," has an issue with the off-the-track drama that's emerged as one of stock car racing's hallm...
In Olympic Hurdles Tune-Up, Organizers Forget To Put Enough Hurdles On The Track
Heptathlete Jessica Ennis is one of the U.K.'s best hopes for a gold, and perhaps even more important, could be a crossover celebrity. So the Great City Games in Manchester was a chance for England to show off one of its most telegenic Olympians on a made-for-tv course: a hurdles track running rig...
Osi Umenyiora Falls <i>Just</i> Shy Of Goal To Get Lawrence Taylor His Super Bowl Ring Back
Lawrence Taylor's son went ahead and auctioned off his father's 1991 Super Bowl ring last night and when all the numbers were tallied, it went for a cool $230,401.20. Further details of the transaction, including who made the winning bid, were not released. But we do know that it was not Osi....
"Like A Giant Scoop It Caught Him Up": The Week In Unintentional Dong Submissions
Here we go with another week of unintentional dong submissions. I hope you know by now to please be sure to send in any would-be penises to the tips department. Let's start our action off this week with Jennifer and a third grader who has accurately refuted the old story about babies and storks. An...
LeBron James Cattily Responds To Lance Stephenson's Choke Gesture
Here's an example of that silly 24-hour news cycle we were chatting about earlier. Lance Stephenson made a choking gesture the other night as LeBron missed some free throws and now it's a federal case. Stephenson actually felt the need to apologize for the performance and has vowed to keep all futu...
Indian Cricket Squad Celebrates Backdoor Playoff Berth With Terrifying Homage To Goatse
There's a lot to lose in translation when it comes to cricket, but this much we know: this picture, posted on facebook, is terrifying. "Nightmare fuel" is not something to be bandied about, but I feel confident in its application here....
Pablo Sandoval Pies CSN Bay Area's Jaymee Sire In The Face
The Giants beat Bay Area rival Oakland yesterday 4-0 and after the game CSN Bay Area's Jaymee Sire was in the clubhouse asking questions and rolling tape. Pablo Sandoval was lurking, however and while poor Jaymee was wise to his plan to get Pagan, she learned the hard way that the Panda is an agil...
Twitter Aficionado Osi Umenyiora Promises To Buy Lawrence Taylor's Super Bowl Ring If He Gets One Million Followers
This Osi Umenyiora guy is a weird cat. A week after calling LeSean McCoy a woman on twitter as an insult, he is now pledging to buy Lawrence Taylor's 1991 Super Bowl ring that is currently being auctioned off, but only if he gets one million followers. Initially he said the millionth follower would...
Today In Bizarrely-Priced Tickets From Wisconsin Police: Softball Coach Gets $177 Citation For Cursing At Players
An insidious trend is developing in Wisconsin. First it was Montee Ball and his $429 ticket for trespassing at a block party. Now comes news that the varsity softball coach at Oconta Falls high school, Dawn Larsen (not pictured), was given a $177 citation after a parent complained about her potty m...
High School Ace Strikes Out Five—<i>In One Inning</i>
La Crescent senior pitcher Eric Veglahn was already having a pretty solid game before he set a Minnesota state record by striking out five batters in the same inning last month. Heading into the seventh inning, Veglahn had eight strikeouts when he decided to try and double his tally in one inning....
Cops Will Steal Your Girlfriend!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
Women's Professional Soccer Is Officially Dead
The WPS announced today that the league has officially folded, and there will be no effort to rebuild after an already-cancelled 2012 season. I can give you two reasons for this rough news, and one is Dan Borislow, possibly the worst man in sports....
Kegasus, The Beer-Loving Mascot Of The Beer-Loving Preakness, Is Actually A Sober Phony
What's the saying? If you'll keg stand for something, you'll fall for anything? Promoters of the Preakness Stakes must believe it. Turns out that Kegasus, spokesbeast for the Preakness and the best mascot in all of sports, is a sham....
Here's Every Single Pitch Of Jose Canseco's Worcester Tornadoes Debut (Spoiler: It Didn't Go Well)
Intrepid tipster Kevin M. dutifully recorded every single pitch of Jose Canseco's long-awaited, much-anticipated, expectations-shattering debut tonight with the independent Worcester Tornadoes, who traveled south to face the Newark Bears. Alas, America's favorite semi-retired, ball-playing hug mac...
Curt Schilling's 38 Studios Can't Pay Employees, Bounced A Check To The State
We've been following the sad saga of 38 Studios, Curt Schilling's video company that moved to Rhode Island after receiving a whopping loan from the state. Well, things haven't gone well. They haven't employed the number of people they promised. Their big game isn't close to being on schedule. The st...
No, NPR Veteran Nina Totenberg Was Not Removed From The Roger Clemens Trial For Eating Potato Chips
Word was circulating yesterday that Nina Totenberg, the 68-year-old legal-affairs reporter for NPR and the doyenne of the Supreme Court press corps, had gotten tossed out of the Roger Clemens trial for eating potato chips. At least, that's what we heard from a tipster....
What Kind Of Politics Writer Can't Even Use A Sports Metaphor Properly? Most Of Them, Actually.
Republished from The Classical....
A Commemorative GIF Of Brett Lawrie's "Unlucky" Helmet Spike That Hit Umpire Bill Miller And Earned Him A Four-Game Suspension
Blue Jays infielder Brett Lawrie will sit out the next four games after throwing a tantrum on home plate umpire Bill Miller during the ninth inning of Toronto's game against Tampa Bay. "It took a bad hop and hit him totally by accident," stated Lawrie, who appealed the suspension though he does pla...
Derrick Rose Is Now Getting Around With A Walker
With his recovery expected to take eight to 12 months, we all knew the Bulls' superstar was in for a grind. But this is just so sad. Until we saw this photo, we had no idea his rehab regimen would also include bingo games, afternoon naps, and the occasional early-bird special....
TNT Should Not Have Allowed This Morbidly Obese Sixers Fan To Participate In The Shirt-Off
The Utah State Aggies have a superfan named Wild Bill who distracts free throw shooters by wearing bizarre, Disney-inspired outfits that often reveal his generous girth....