si Page 797 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Dubstep Nolan Ryan Wants To Look At That "Tremendous Wiener"
After public outcry and questioning regarding the Texas Rangers' plan to sell a $26 hot dog this season, team owner/president Nolan Ryan took to the Galloway & Company program on KESN-FM 103.3 in Dallas to profess his own curiosity about the behemoth frankfurter. He spoke about it in such a parti...
Just In Time For Titanic 3D, It's An Iceberg Phallus: The Week In Unintentional Dongs
Well, well, well. We meet again for some pseudo-dongage. Strap in for the ride of your lives couple minutes or so on a Saturday. Our first submission is from Adam. As always, be sure to send in any would-be penises to the tips department....
Goodbye, Old Friend: The Last Oddibe McDowell Water Bill We'll Ever See Is $80.55
The Broward County department of Waste and Wastewater Services is instituting password protection for viewing and paying customers' utility bills. This could be the last Oddibe McDowell water bill we ever see. It's $80.55, including a semi-annual stormwater fee....
DeMarcus Cousins Chases Errant Shot, Runs Face-First Into Basket
The irony is that Cousins really does everything he ought to be doing here. John Salmons pretty much tosses a jumpshot into the stands, and Cousins gets after it to try to maintain possession for the Kings. It's the basket stanchion that's recklessly sitting there. But that's good hustle....
Bo Ryan Can't Wait To Tell You Where His Finger's Been
Wisconsin's season may be over—the Badgers being 64-63 losers to Syracuse last night in Boston—but head coach Bo Ryan left us all at least one memory that will last the whole summer....
NATO Bombing Helped Young Novak Djokovic Play More Tennis
Talented tennis professional Novak Djokovic was just another promising 12-year-old kid in Belgrade, Yugoslavia, when NATO planes started relentlessly bombing the area in the spring of 1999. Over three months time, hardly a day went without something blowing up, and young Djokovic would sleep with hi...
Andrei Kirilenko's Wife, For Unknown Reasons, Wore A <em>Scream</em> Mask
Look, we're no experts on Russia, and no one wants to be culturally insensitive. But according to the official Twitter feed of CSKA Moscow, the top team in the Russian Basketball SuperLeague, former NBAer Andrei Kirilenko got an elbow to the eye in the third quarter of last night's game and Masha Lo...
Stephon Marbury Refuses To Do Interviews Unless He Gets The Cover Of <i>Sports Illustrated</i>
There are tons of lovable little nuggets in this SI.com piece on Marbury and how the mercurial outcast has somehow become the most beloved foreign player in Chinese basketball history. But our absolute favorite—that he turned down multiple interview requests unless he would be SI's cover boy—is vint...
Are Messi And Barcelona Sending Secret Messages To Help Rebels Smuggle Guns Into Syria?
The answer is, no, obviously not. That would be stupid. But we can't ignore it, because at least one entity is buying into the conspiracy theory that Messi, Pedro and their Barcelona teammates are sending hidden messages to the Syrian resistance via their on-field play in a recent Clásico: Syrian...
Dead Wrestler Of The Week: Yokozuna (Deadspin Classic)
The WWE revealed on Tuesday that it will induct the late Yokozuna (born Rodney Anoa'i) into its Hall of Fame. In 2010, our Dead Wrestler of the Week column paid tribute to the big man. Originally published April 23, 2010....
According To People.com, There Is No Difference Between Tim Tebow And Jesus Christ
If you can't read that headline, click on the image to enlarge it. Or just read it in the ensuing sentence, if the image refuses to enlarge. Asks People.com, "Who's the hotter QB, Him or Mark Sanchez?"...
The Beards Of Summer: Remembering The Days When A Barnstorming Cult Ruled Baseball
Chris Siriano wants to get the hell out of Michigan. Even on a gorgeous fall day in Addison (population 627), with the leaves turning and the sun bright, Siriano—middle-aged, sporting a gray goatee and ball cap—can't stop dreaming about the beach. "I raised my daughter by myself and everybody knew t...
Hey, Jets! Here's A Photo Of Tim Tebow's Bare Foot
Now there's a quarterback that a coach can dream on!...
Watch All 234 Goals Leo Messi Scored To Break The Barcelona Record
It's sometimes easy to forget how good Leo Messi is. He performs extraordinary feats with such regularity they seem routine. Messi scores. Again. Messi dribbles through five defenders and scores. Again. Messi dribbles through five defenders, is hacked mercilessly, refuses to go down, dances around...
I Have A Confession: I Don't Know How To Pronounce Yoenis Cespedes
So I thought I'd get this out in the open now, before the season starts and I'm forced to embarrass myself publicly: I don't know how to pronounce A's outfielder Yoenis Cespedes's name....
Reconstructing The Strange Rose Bowl Trip Of John "Meat" Chadima, Former Wisconsin Associate AD And Alleged Crotch-Grabber
When University of Wisconsin associate athletic director John Chadima abruptly resigned on Jan. 6, neither the school nor Chadima offered much explanation. Chadima, who handled scheduling and travel for a Wisconsin football team that had just returned from a Rose Bowl defeat, penned a resignation le...
Skip Bayless, Emmy Nominee
Did you know that sports has its very own Emmy Awards? It's perfectly fair to honor the great work being done out there in the televised sports field, with amazing technical inovation in game broadcasts and shows like Outside the Lines, E:60 and Real Sports doing real, actual journalism on par with ...
New Nets Arena Will Sell "Brooklyn Water" That's Made In Florida
"Made," obviously, getting scare quotes because it's water. In fact, let's use some more scare quotes. The Barclays Center, as part of its stated goal to use local vendors and products, will sell "Brooklyn Water" that's bottled in Florida but "Brooklynized," then shipped to Brooklyn. Where the Nets ...
Arizona Newscaster Hears Manning Signed With Denver, Lets Out A Big Old "Fuck!" [Update]
Sometimes you can't hide your emotions. Kaley O'Kelley of Good Morning Arizona certainly couldn't, when she found out that Peyton Manning had eschewed the Cardinals for the Denver Broncos. (Unspoken subtext: "Fuck! Kevin Kolb.") [via Jimmy Traina]...
After Evading The Law Twice, Zach Bogosian Should Finally Have To Face The Shanaban (Update)
In November, Bogosian dropped Cody Eakin with an elbow across the head. It was arguably clean. In December, Bogoian wrecked Pierre-Marc Bouchard face-first into the boards. It was very arguably dirty. Both times, Bogosian escaped suspension....