si Page 804 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Bruins Fans Make Clever "Two Minutes For Hooking" Sign That Gets Filthy Photoshop Update
That is a pretty clever sign from Saturday's game between the Islanders and Bruins. The girls are enjoying themselves, Tyler Seguin is enjoying himself—all around just a good time is being had by all....

The Flyers' Wayne Simmonds Scored A Goal With His Face
Wayne Simmonds was a bloody mess after scoring a goal with his face in the second period of Philadelphia's 4-3 shootout loss to Ottawa today, but credit to the Flyers' winger for showing toughness and returning to help his team force overtime after being down 3-0. Still, though, wearing a visor w...

It's Raining Dongs, Hallelujah: The Week In Unintentional Dong Submissions
Welcome back to the best in unintentional dongs. We have quite the assortment this week so do come inside. As always, be sure to send in any would-be penises to the tips department. Our lead unintentional dong today comes from reader Nicholas who snapped this shot of a dong raindrop-inspired chande...

It’s Always More Fun When When It’s Your Wife Vomiting
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

WrestleMania Betting Odds, And How To Gamble On Pro Wrestling
WrestleMania XXVIII will go down Sunday in Miami, and I'd like you to ask yourself some questions. Can the Undertaker extend his Wrestlemania record to 20-0? Will Chris Jericho or CM Punk get the better of what could be an all-time classic? Does the Rock still have what it takes to bring down John C...

Why Should Several Big Schools Pay A Company $10K A Year To Monitor Their Athletes' Twitter Accounts?
Pete Thamel has a story in the New York Times about a spunky, depressing new company called Varsity Monitor. Its motto (emphasis Varsity Monitor's):...

Joe Posnanski Is Leaving <em>Sports Illustrated</em> For Some Sort Of New <em>USA Today</em> Venture
Posnanski confirmed his departure after approximately three years at SI in a phone conversation with The Big Lead. He's joining some sort of joint venture between USA Today and MLB Advanced Media, which became a thing just last month....

A Stripper's Guide To The Final Four
During the 2007 Final Four, I traveled to Atlanta with a couple of friends to dance at the Pink Pony. We were surprised to find the local dancers questioning why the dancer manager was urging them to work all weekend, then do it again next weekend during the Masters. By the Sunday before the final, ...

Real Madrid's Iker Casillas Wiped His Boogers On A Child's Face
Real Madrid's Champions League first leg against APOEL was three days ago, but video is only now emerging of the most exciting thing to happen in that mismatch: Real keeper Iker Casillas wiping his nose, then wiping his hand on the face of one of those kids who lead the players onto the pitch. Nev...

Sorry, Padres Fans: Your Cable Company Just Screwed You
Heading into this season, one bright spot for San Diego Padres fans—and this is really a stretch—is the arrival of a spanking new regional cable network from Fox Sports. And a new network means a new round of exciting negotiations with each cable TV and satellite provider. Good news is, if you're a ...

Sidney Crosby Was Knocked Out Of Tonight's Game By A Puck To The Face
Poor Sid Crosby just can't catch a break. He can, however, catch a puck in the nose, as happened tonight at Nassau during the second period of the Penguins' clash with the Islanders. Crosby—just a few weeks returned from yet another lengthy tenure off the ice due to concussion symptoms—actually ma...

Why Can't Roger Goodell Go One Day Without Lying?
Let's go on a magical trip to the NFL's fantasy world, where the penalties on the Redskins and Cowboys have anything to do with football. Indulge them when they tell you that two teams spending more than a nonexistent salary cap in the uncapped 2010 season constituted "an unacceptable risk to future...

Fox Considering Launching Its Own National Sports Network
After conquering most of the cable news market, Rupert Murdoch's News Corp. is now taking aim at the Worldwide Leader, and is in the process of launching their own 24-hour national sports network....

It's More Than A Little Weird To See 10,000 People Pray For Daniel Sedin's Concussed Brain
The Passion World Tour is an annual series of gatherings of college-age evangelicals for music and prayer. The 2012 tour kicked off on Friday at Vancouver's Rogers Arena, home of the Canucks and their concussed superstar Daniel Sedin. At one point during the festivities, Pastor Louie Giglio asked ...

Chow Fun: Jeremy Lin Has A Pleasant Lunch With "Chink In The Armor" Headline Writer
Anthony Federico, the former ESPNer who wrote the "Chink In The Armor" headline for which he has been apologizing to anyone who'll stand still long enough, tells Newsday: "We talked more about matters of faith [and] reconciliation. We talked about our shared Christian values and what we're both tryi...

Which Sports Leagues Care If You Call Someone A "Fucking Faggot?"
This here's Colin Clark, a midfielder for the Houston Dynamo. On Friday, Clark was frustrated with a ball boy for not giving him a new ball fast enough. Picked up by the onfield microphones, everyone watching the nationally televised game heard Clark call the ball boy a "fucking faggot." It immedi...

Tim Tebow Is So Uncontroversial The <em>Times</em> Is Afraid To Say What's Not Controversial About Him
Hey, anyone want to fire up the ol' Tim Tebow culture war again? It's been, what, three days? Well, here's a "meet the new guy" story in today's New York Times called "Tebow, a Careful Evangelical." It is a generally inoffensive look at the quarterback so beloved by people who collect Hummel figurin...

Tripping Basketballs: Hoopsters Are Alive And Well At The Ultra Music Festival
While we declared the end to the Hoopster trend a year and a half ago, the Hoopsters show no signs of quitting—certainly not at this past weekend's Ultra music fest in Miami. For the uninitiated, Ultra is the social event for college kids who love Ecstasy and sort of like electronic music. Here are...

Unlike that Seventh-Round Draft Pick, Your Inbox Has Potential
Bandwagoning happens. One day you're proudly wearing the jersey of a first-round draft pick, and the next, your closet looks like the locker room for Team Disappointment. It's not your fault—at the time, it really did seem like that 6'3'' guard out of Harvard was going to lead your team to glory. ...
