sports Page 624 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Mario Gomez Had A Messi-Like Four Goals In Yesterday's Champions League Match, But Says "I'm No Messi"
Bayern Munich's Mario Gomez snuffed out Swiss side Basel's underdog dreams in the UEFA Champions League with a four-goal performance yesterday (courtesy a lot of help from Franck Ribery). Coming so soon after Lionel Messi's five-goal CL spectacular, comparisons were inevitable. Nonsense, says Gom...

March Madness Means Charles Barkley Fueling Your Future Night Terrors
The odd, temporary marriage between CBS and Turner during the NCAA tournament means occasional instances of one's chocolate being found in another's peanut butter, or vice-versa if you will. College basketball fans get a taste of TNT's Inside the NBA wackiness while NBA mavens let Jim Nantz singleh...

JaVale McGee Gave Jason Kidd The Easiest Steal Of His Career Tonight
The stat tracking software used by the NBA has standard stock phrases for events in the game. Here's how the official description of this reads in the play-by-play:...

Northwestern's Attempted Halftime Buzzer-Beater Didn't Go In The Basket, But It Did Hit Somebody In The Head
Northwestern's consolation for missing out on the NCAA Tournament was hosting one of tonight's opening NIT games against Akron. While they missed this attempt to score before the halftime buzzer, I'm pretty sure knocking the ESPN camera assistant's hat off is worth a couple hundred tickets at a N...

President Obama Called His Team's Shooting "Terrible," So MVSU's Kevin Burwell Hit A Three In Front Of Him Then Talked Junk
The first half of tonight's opening game of the NCAA tournament featured awful shooting by both teams, and President Obama rightly called out both Western Kentucky and Mississippi Valley State on it during his halftime conversation with Clark Kellogg. While some players might have considered that...

ESPN Keeps Interrupting Its Programming To Give You Gambling Advice In The Most Annoying Way Possible
"Bullshit." "Ridiculous." "Pissing me off." "Hopefully it never happens again."...

Philadelphia Goalkeeper Zac McMath's MLS Season Did Not Get Off To The Best Start
Major League Soccer kicked off this weekend, and with MLS Commissioner Don Garber in attendance, the Portland Timbers were eager to put on their best show in the home opener against Philadelphia Union last night. After falling behind 1-0, the Timbers' Andrew Jean-Baptiste knocked this goal past U...

Onscreen Typos Don't Get Much More Unfortunate Than This
It's bad enough 10 seed Iowa State gets to play at home, but Iowa City market station KCRG-Cedar Rapids just had to play the stereotype card, didn't they? (Not to mention Green Bay dropped the UW part of their name some time ago.) We can only imagine what they called the Hawkeyes' first round oppon...

Even George Karl Has Jumped Aboard The Messi Bandwagon
As NBA players sent messages of support to Ricky Rubio upon news of his ACL tear, Nuggets head coach George Karl showed his softer side by sporting an FC Barcelona shirt while meeting with the press yesterday. Karl's son Coby played with Rubio on Joventut Badalona after fizzling out in the NBA and ...

Opposing Team Pays Terrell Owens To Play Road Game, Promptly Knocks Him Over The Wall
Terrell Owens's contract with the Allen Wranglers stipulates he only has to play home games, but he's let it be known he can be enticed to hop on the metaphorical bus with the rest of his team if the opposition agrees to pay him separately. It appears that's what happened today, as T.O. took to th...

Clippers Broadcaster Michael Eaves Spends Commercial Break Talking About "Bums" And Naked Girls
The NBA's had some technical issues today in their network distributing the League Pass package and one of them let viewers in on the private thoughts of Los Angeles Clippers broadcaster Michael Eaves, who during a commercial break expounded upon the use of the word "bum" and addressed a too-quick...

The Prospect Of A Kentucky-North Carolina Championship Game Blew Several Of Dick Vitale's Fuses
Dickie V's one of ESPN's most polarizing personalities, with people falling either on the side of adoration of his positivity or dismissal of his antics. But we can't quite say we've ever seen anything like what happened at the end of ESPN's NCAA Tournament coverage, in which Vitale had a complet...

Florida State, Vanderbilt, And Michigan State Are Going Dancing, But They Would Have Been Anyway
This brings to a close our series highlighting teams celebrating their conference championships, and like most televised entertainment, it comes to a somewhat anticlimactic end. Sure, FSU won the ACC for the first time ever, and Vanderbilt won the SEC tournament for the first time since 1951 (thou...

NBC Stalks Tiger Woods's Car With A Blimp; ESPN Asks If Peyton Manning Was Riding Shotgun
Tiger Woods dropped out of today's final round at the Cadillac Championship, citing leg trouble before he drove away. In an apparent attempt to ascertain the degree of injury based on his driving, the Peacock Net tasked its blimp with chasing Tiger's car as it escaped Doral. It's unclear what's b...

St. Bonaventure Is Going Dancing
The past ten years have been mostly forgettable for St. Bonaventure, the tenure's nadir being a 2-26 season in 2005 that came in the wake of scandal and suicide. Last season's 16-15 record was the first time the Bonnies finished above .500 since 2002, and their last NCAA appearance was in 2000....

The Oregon 5A Girls' High School Championship Ended With A 16-7 Final Score
Despite featuring the nation's top junior basketball recruit Mercedes Russell, Oregon's 5A state championship game ended up being the lowest-scoring in history: a 16-7 snoozefest won by Russell's Springfield squad over Willamette....

New Mexico State Is Going Dancing
These truly are special times for the basketball-loving Land of Enchantment, with the Lobos running off with a Mountain West tourney win and now the Aggies from Las Cruces joining the party after their Saturday Night Special 82-57 drubbing of Louisiana Tech. [ESPN2]...

Bob Knight: Ice Cream Cone Enthusiast
Look at that man. Look at the smile on his face, the joy in his heart. A man enjoying one of life's simpler pleasures, everything in his countenance revealing the easy-going, pleasant personality of a man who has lived with love in his heart and every day without a stroke of anger....

Long Beach State Is Going Dancing
The Long Beach State 49ers played five teams in the RPI's top 25 this season in their out-of-conference schedule. They lost all of them, sure, but at least in this instance the burnishing of losses to quality teams prepared Dan Monson's squad for the tangled mayhem of Big West rivalries....

Here's The Gerald Green Dunk Everybody's Talking About
This simple play is the genesis for a litany of questions. Among them: Gerald Green is still in the NBA? (Yes, on a ten-day contract with the Nets.) Where has he been? (In the D-League, mostly, but also playing in China and Russia.) Why has the NBA beaten the punch to would-be screencappers to upl...