st Page 1910 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Lance Armstrong Files Suit Against USADA And Its "Kangaroo Court"
Lance Armstrong is through fucking around. The latest doping charges against the seven-time Tour De France winner and world-class bully have been answered, not with evidence or witnesses, but with a lawsuit. Armstrong has taken the US Anti-Doping Agency to federal court, claiming that USADA's charge...

Olympics Field Guide: Lolo Jones, The 29-Year-Old Virgin Hurdler
Name: Lori "Lolo" Jones...

Steve Zakuani Returns To Action 15 Months After Gruesome Injury, Embraces The Man Who Pulverized His Leg
Sounders winger Steve Zakuani wondered if he'd ever play soccer again in the months after a brutal sliding tackle from Colorado midfielder Brian Mullan in April 2011 snapped both lower bones in his right leg. (Here's video of that incident, for those of you with strong and empty stomachs.) More t...

Marlins Complain To MLB Because Greg Dobbs, Justin Ruggiano, And Steve Cishek Didn't Make The All-Star Team
Giancarlo Stanton, the hulking Marlins right fielder, is having one hell of an age-22 season—19 home runs, a .284/.364/.554 batting line, an all-star spot, solid gold stuff. Or, well, Stanton's season was solid gold until he hurt his knee. He underwent surgery today and pulled out of the home run de...

ESPN's Fall Lineup Should Include Loads Of Political Attack Ads
Save for its role in putting Craig James's head on the nation's television screens, ESPN has traditionally allowed viewers to ignore politics. The ad spaces during timeouts and between SportsCenter segments were for Gatorade and Five-Hour Energy, not campaign ads....

Guy Sues Strip Club For Billing $50,000 To His Credit Card
Lokesh Simon James went to the Bliss Cabaret in Clearwater, Fla., one night in March. He estimates having spent $600 in three hours. His credit card bill later indicated he rang up $50,000, and because James admits he was at the club on the night in question, his credit card company refuses to count...

Did An ESPN Anchor Need To Apologize For An Astros "Trailer Park Day" Joke?
Car seats are used to safely secure children inside of automobiles. They are not baseball gloves and should not be used for such a purpose. When SportsCenter showed the highlight of a Houston Astros fan attempting to utilize such a device for exactly that, an exasperated Bram Weinstein asked, "Is ...

What Is On The Syllabus for Florida State's Class On How Not To End Up Like Bobby Petrino?
It's an important class for college students these days, so thank goodness for Dr. Jason Pappas. The course is named "Issues in Sports Management," or perhaps more accurately "How To Avoid Crashing Your Motorcycle While Joyriding With A Younger Female Employee Who Is Not Your Wife." Its course code...

Here's Terrible Video That Supposedly Shows Adrian Peterson Getting Handcuffed
There's not a whole lot to glean from this video, but here it is anyway. It looks like a black man is either in cuffs or on his way to being in cuffs, and could possibly be struggling. TMZ helpfully directs your attention to this black man and labels him as Adrian Peterson. the woman recording the i...

Umpire Sam Holbrook Tossed Zack Greinke After Just Four Pitches Last Night
On the off chance you thought a new day had dawned, here's some bad news: umpires are still assholes sometimes....

Cherry-Pit Spitting Contest Makes For Great Copy
This is a great article for a sweaty Saturday evening. It's short, sweet and absolutely absurd. Let's start with the headline:...

Associated Press: Oklahoma City Thunder Sign Brian Westbrook And The Guy From <em>27 Dresses</em>, Serge Ibaka Excited To Play Them In Olympics
Oklahoma City Thunder power forward Serge Ibaka will be playing for the Spanish national team at this year's summer Olympics. Today, the Associated Press published a relatively mundane story about Ibaka's belief that his Spanish team has the talent to compete with the U.S. team....

You Won't Regret Reading About The Seven Best Bill Murray Stories
Bill Murray is an awesome dude, and he'll always have a special place in the hearts of sports fans for doing stuff like this, this, and this....
![Reports: Vikings RB Adrian Peterson Arrested, Charged With Resisting Arrest [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17s3q72lnjwbojpg.jpg)
Reports: Vikings RB Adrian Peterson Arrested, Charged With Resisting Arrest [UPDATE]
Details are still sketchy but according to the Houston Chronicle, Adrian Peterson may still be in a Houston jail (he's since been released on $1,000 bond) in connection with resisting arrest charges....

Carl Crawford Called Racial Slur, <i>Boston Globe</i> Quotes Urban Dictionary
Carl Crawford suffered a "a mild left groin strain" hustling for a triple during a minor league rehab game. He will resume his rehab stint after at least five days. It's a bummer for Crawford and the Red Sox, but it may be a welcome respite as New England residents perpetuate stereotypes....

Freeh Investigation Report Said To Be "Tough On Paterno"
According to ESPN The Magazine's Don Van Natta, Jr., The Freeh report should be released as soon as next week. It is expected to be bad for Joe Paterno....

Ray Allen Leaves Boston Just As He Found It: In Shambles
Last night Ray Allen told Miami Heat officials that he will be accepting their "mini mid-level" contract offer of about $3 million. Boston is reacting with its usual restrained dignity. He's now being called a traitor or Judus. (Funny story about Ray Allen: he was once in a movie and played a guy c...

Compared To Boston, Chicago Media Is Paradise For Kevin Youkilis
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Youk only says that because he's not a Cub....

Tom Cruise Vs. Werner Herzog And Adventures In Perilous White People Tourism: It's Time For Trailer Hitch
The summer movie world is in a bit of a lull right now: Spider-Man showed up in time for July 4, Savages sneaked in just under the "Blake Lively Being Double Teamed-Themed Festivus Day" holiday wire and now everyone's slowing their roll for a couple of weeks until The Dark Knight Rises opens. Which ...

The Top 22 Athlete Nicknames Of All Time
The Deadspin staff has determined the funniest, most creative, and most memorable pro athlete nicknames of all time. The list:...