st Page 2112 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

In The Future, Even Robots Will Blog About Athlete Dong
StatSheet, a Durham-based company with only nine employees, is developing a network of sports blogs that run entirely on automated content. Their "robot army" is already producing content for all 345 men's college basketball teams. Be afraid, blogosphere....

Alabama Football Staffer Fired For Playing "Take the Money and Run" Before Iron Bowl
The university announced that the part-time employee was fired for playing "unauthorized" music at Bryant-Denny Stadium. The unauthorized music also happened to be directed at Auburn quarterback Cam Newton....

The Newest Saga In The Sad Story Of Broke Antoine Walker Brings Us To The D-League
There was a time when Antoine Walker was every Celtics fan's second-favorite player. How our fortunes change. Six months after filing for personal bankruptcy, Walker is reportedly joining the Idaho Stampede — assuming he passes a routine background check....

Your Barcelona-Real Madrid Scoring Bonanza Goal Roundup
The Clasico match between Barcelona and Real Madrid was absurdly lopsided. Barca netted five goals in an utter domination of Cristiano and the rest of Jose Mourinho's crew. Enjoy our compilation of the bloodletting....

Andre Johnson And Cortland Finnegan Get Wrist Slaps For Punches
Johnson and Finnegan were each fined $25,000 but not suspended for their fistfight yesterday. They can thank the Richard Seymour precedent of "slugging guys who probably deserve it." [NFL.com]...

Weekend Winner: The Big East, College Sports' Honest Harlot
TCU, a school approximately 400 miles west of the Mississippi, will soon play sports in a conference called the Big East, FanHouse informs. You have to admire the Big East. It never fails to be the hardest-working lapdancer in the room....

Stumbly, Pot-Bellied Redskins Fan And Compatriot Receive Beating At Hands Of Other Redskins Fans
...and then the cops show up and everybody stands around for a few minutes before the person taping confirms that he recorded the whole thing....

Russell Westbrook Posterizes Shane Battier With Vicious Slam
Midway through last night's Thunder-Rockets game, Kevin Durant swung the ball out to Russell Westbrook who drove straight to the hoop and elevated for a dunk that straight embarrassed alleged defensive maestro Shane Battier....

Yeah, This Is The Best Interception We've Ever Seen
While most of the country was being treated to a meaningless Notre Dame-USC game, Oklahoma and Oklahoma State had themselves a barn burner. Unseen by most of the country? This gem: a tag-team interception by State's Broderick Brown and Shaun Lewis....

Name That Mascot Dong, Pt. 2 (UPDATE: Lighthouse Penis Speaks, Gets Kicked In The Groin)
This weekend we brought you the phallic-shaped cannon now representing the Columbus Blue Jackets. UMass-Boston might one-up them with "Beacon," who's clearly a bipedal penis....

At FSU-Florida Tailgates, Beer-Bonging May Be Interrupted By An Ass-Jiggling Gal Falling Off A Pick-up Truck
Hopefully, the poor girl in the huge sunglasses got to finally suck down that funnel she'd been diligently training for all day. She seemed rattled. [YouTube]...

Peter King Only Drives The Favremobile On Weekends
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Steve Johnson's Dropped Pass Has Caused Him To Seriously Rethink His Devotion To A Higher Power
The usually sure-handed wide out comes to the realization that, no matter how hard he prays, there are powerful forces working against the Buffalo Bills. Nobody circles the wagons like Almighty God. [Twitter]...

Here's A Spirited Defense Of "Colored" Tiger Woods Which Condemns Brett Favre, SI, Dumb Parents And America
Words beyond "offended but strangely mesmerized" escape me after reading this email that came in at 12:31 a.m. yesterday. Spent a day and a half debating whether I should even post it. You decide whether I made the right call....

Real Madrid And Barcelona Could Provide The Best Soccer Game On Earth Tomorrow
It's a waste of time to try and convince soccer haters of the excellence that tomorrow's el Clasico between Ronaldo's Real Madrid and Messi's Barcelona potentially offers. It's also unnecessary to remind fans of the 2:55-ish p.m. EST start....

Here's Video Of A Texan Fighting A Titan
Texans wide receiver Andre Johnson and Titans cornerback Cortland Finnegan mixed it up today. Both got tossed out. Look....

They Love Boise State Kicker Kyle Brotzman. Or At Least They Pretend To.
In the aftermath of being kicked out of national-championship contention, some Boise State fans created a Facebook page titled "The Bronco Nation Loves Kyle Brotzman." Earlier this morning, 9,570 liked it....

Someone Will Probably Ask "Is LeBron A Passive-Aggressive Sprewell" Soon
If I have to anything to say about last night's "LeBron-Spoelstra bump," it's this: LeBron James does seem to kind of lean into being in [edit] head coach Eric Spoelstra's path during last night's loss vs. Dallas....

Hockey Player's Face Gets Bloodied While Lady With A Pink BlackBerry Cover Sort Of Watches
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Does It Surprise Anyone That Mini-Belichicks Are Involved In The "Spygate II" Probe?
Here's some background: Denver Broncos director of video operations Steve Scarnecchia (right) worked for the Patriots from 2001-05 while Broncos head coach Josh McDaniels remained in New England until 2009. In 2007, the Patriots got caught videotaping opponents signals....