take Page 12 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Accused Serial Groper Arnold Schwarzenegger Denounces Confessed Groper Donald Trump
Now joining the parade of prominent Republicans who have declared that, as of yesterday, Donald Trump became insupportable: former California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger. In a statement posted to Twitter, the muscleman and action-movie hero wrote: ...
Mariners Catcher Barfs Out Some Thoughts About Protestors, Compares Them To Animals
Steve Clevenger is an oft-injured backup catcher for the Seattle Mariners, who is hitting .221 this season in 68 at-bats. This afternoon, he weighed in on the protests sweeping through Charlotte with all the subtlety of an elephant playing the piano....
Skip Bayless Explains How To Argue When You Agree
Skip Bayless’s and Shannon Sharpe’s two-and-a-half-hour sports shouting show, Second Take, has apparently put a dent in First Take’s ratings, perhaps thanks to all those loyal Skipheads out there who just want to see their man yell. But what’s to do when Bayless and Sharpe agree on a topic and have ...
Troy Aikman Hates Skip Bayless, And Fox Sports Loves It<em></em>
Skip Bayless’s new show on FS1, the two-and-a-half-hour-long Second Take, just wrapped up its debut, and you’ll be shocked to learn not only that he and cohost Shannon Sharpe discussed Tim Tebow, Johnny Manziel, and the Cowboys in-depth, but that Bayless challenged Sharpe to bring stronger takes mul...
Race-Baiting Troll Phil Mushnick Cooks His Spiciest Meatball Yet
We haven’t heard from race-baiting troll and New York Post sports columnist Phil Mushnick in a while. He had a Colin Kaepernick take this evening. It will absolutely not surprise you. It’s entitled “Why Colin Kaepernick Is Wrong: It’s Not A Black-And-White Issue.” Like, I said, no surprises to be fo...
Hell Exists And It's Getting Your Hair Cut While Skip Bayless Yells At You
The Los Angeles Times’ Lance Pugmire talked to old friend Skip Bayless and wrote about his preparation for the premiere of Second Take, which will begin airing on Sept. 6 and, if patterns hold, will stop drawing viewers about a week later when everyone is finished rubber-necking. Skip has already pr...
Blue Jays Assistant Offers The Hottest Advanced Stats Take Of All
Are you seated? Are you prepared to hear the rawest, truest sabermetrics take of all time from Blue Jays scout Steve Springer?...
Steve Martin Is My Body Icon
I assume that there is an amount of working out, tanning, waxing, and grooming I could do in order to be a moderately more handsome person. I have no interest in doing this. My body icon isn’t a Hemsworth or a Tyrese. It’s Steve Martin, who has mastered the art of looking like the same person for as...
Michael Phelps Drops Tombstone On Chad Le Clos, Wins 20th Gold Medal
Chad le Clos, who took advantage of Michael Phelps’s collapse in the 200 butterfly four years ago, poked the bear last night. He didn’t make it to the medal stand, and Phelps won his 20th gold. Rest in peace....
Bob Costas's Legendary Belmont Beer Chug Was Actually A Little Baby Sip
For years now, a flattering story about tiny sportscaster Bob Costas has been circulating around the internet. Legend has it that while Costas was covering the 2011 Belmont Stakes, a rowdy fan threw a beer at him. Costas is said to have caught the can of suds with one hand, and then chugged the beve...
All The Olympic Sports Should Be Outdoors
“Indoors” does not care what the season is. Seasons do not exist indoors. That is the whole reason we have indoors. When you stick a seasonal specifier like “Summer” or “Winter” in front of your event, your event has to take place in that actual season, which is outdoors. That is science. Therefore ...
What Is The Wildest Sports Take That You Sincerely Believe?
The other day we were talking about a sports media figure who was having a Twitter meltdown, standing behind a take they seemingly truly believed in even though it was self-evidently bad. And it got us thinking, what is the wildest sports take that you sincerely believe? ...
Good Luck, Everybody
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We'd Love To Hear More Of Jason Whitlock's Ideas About Communist Mastery Of The American Media
Yesterday, Fox Sports personality and All Takes Matter co-host Jason Whitlock sent some interesting tweets about Communist financial influence on the American media:...
"Guys, Start Talking"
Say what you will about Colin Cowherd and Jason Whitlock, but it’s clear they both take direction well. Here are the All Takes Matter hosts pretending to chat—at the direction of Fox broadcast personnel—as the network attempts to promote their shitty TV show....
Max Kellerman Replaces Skip Bayless On <i>First Take</i>
ESPN has officially announced that Max Kellerman will be Skip Bayless’s replacement on First Take, confirming weeks of reports that he was the leading contender for the job of sitting stone-faced while Stephen A. Smith yells. Kellerman will give up his radio show and duties on SportsNation to take t...
This Is The Ultimate Florida Story
This week the Tampa Bay Times published a bonkers story that is so exceptionally Floridian that I have to share it with you all. It features partying, foreclosures, drugs, The Undertaker, racketeering, and a cosmetic surgeon, among other things....
No One Is Watching <i>All Takes Matter</i>
Fox Sports 1's new flagship debate fest, All Takes Matter, isn’t very good. The problem isn’t that it features two idiots slinging bad takes—although it does—but that it’s boring. Good sports studio shows need to be either smart or entertaining. A select few—Inside the NBA is the prime example—manag...