tea Page 118 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
To Watch Tonight
What to watch with your friend, Arthur "Two Sheds" Jackson ... • Boxing: Light heavyweights, Chris Henry vs. Rubin Williams, at Houston (9 p.m., ET). Shouldn't the jock be worn inside the trunks? [ESPN2] • Cycling: Tour de France, Stage 5, Cholet to Chateauroux, France (8 p.m., ET). Why must the sea...
Mike Lowell Kills With Cell Phone Pranks
Those crafty Red Sox, you never know what they're going to be up to next....
Morning Blogdome: Don't Go For Second Best, Baby
• A-Rod, His Wife, and Lenny Kravitz walk into a Madonna concert...: So, you're Alex Rodriguez, attending a Madonna concert with your wife and you say to yourself, "God. Madonna. She's really brawny and inspiring. I wish I could talk with her and just figure out how she does it." And you're Cynthia,...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you tearfully raise your fist with pride and chant "USA! USA!" ... • Major League Soccer: Houston at Real Salt Lake (10 p.m., ET). How to change the station without using my hands? [ESPN2] • Motor sports: NASCAR Sprint Cup, Coke Zero 400, practice, at Daytona Beach, Fla (4 p.m. and ...
This Woman Is Smiling Because She Just Humped A High School Baseball Team
Here we have Julie Pritchett, a former middle school special-ed teacher in sleepy Trussville, Alabama, whose love of young men playing baseball extends beyond the diamond, and into her pants....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while wondering why it's always Ohio... • MLB: Chicago White Sox at Chicago Cubs. I'm told they're not fond of each other, and with good reason. [ESPN] • NBC: Olympics: U.S. Olympic Qualifying, Women's Gymnastics. Make.It.Stop. • Show: Weeds, in case you missed Monday's season premier....
About Last Night
All those who guessed that the cubicle rampage video was a fake, please come collect your winnings ... • MLB: All hail the walkoff grand slam. Everybody say Uggla! Marlins 6, Phillies 2. • Soccer: Wait, they have Cristiano Ronaldo, and Pepe? How can Portugal ever lose? • NFL: I Am Legend ... Will Sm...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while giving into sloth, greed, lust, wrath, envy, pride and especially gluttony....
Bury My Heart At Wounded Knee In A Pringles Can
By anyone's estimation, Frederic J. Baur lived a full life. The organic chemist and food storage technician lived to the ripe old age of 89. He and his wife had two sons and four grandchildren. But chief among his accomplishments, he thought, was his design of the Pringles can. That's why, come chec...
Oye Como Va! Twice The Santana Means Twice The Fun
Please do not confuse Johan Alexander Santana Araque, pitcher for the Mets, with Ervin Ramon Santana, pitcher for the Angels. One is from Venezuela (chief exports: Petroleum, bauxite and aluminum) and one is from the Dominican Republic (predominant religion: Roman Catholicism). Unfortunately, we ar...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch after a day at the penis museum ... • Golf: LPGA, Corning (N.Y.) Classic, first round, (6:30 p.m. ET; same-day tape). So who do you think is hotter; Danielle Ammaccapane or Dina Ammaccapane? [The Golf Channel] • NBA: Eastern Conference finals, Game 2, Detroit at Boston (8:30 p.m., ET)....
1st Round, Twelveth Overall: Broncos Select Ryan Clady
Clady is the first football player ever to leave Boise State early. Why would anyone ever leave Boise early? Come to think of it, why would anyone go to Boise?...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch with Gary Busey, who will be sleeping on your couch for a couple of weeks ... • Boxing: Kevin Johnson vs. Terry Smith, at Miami, Okla., (9 p.m., ET, same-day tape). Another new twist in Lost? [ESPN2] • Motor Sports: IndyCar Series, Firestone IndyCar 300, at Motegi, Japan (midnight, ET)...
Get Along, 76ers
Here are some more not-so-revealing photos of an NBA dance team, courtesy of internet rapscallion Don Chavez, who pulled these pictures of the Sixers dance team acting like an ample-bosomed professional dance team out at a bar, from some unsuspecting member's Webshots album. The significance of thi...
Storming The Floor's San Antonio Road Trip
Storming The Floor was in San Antonio for the NCAA Title Game last night. Check out their full report....
ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its cleverest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......
'Hawks Fan Hocks Bitter Loogie
Southerners and the Civil War. That's perhaps the one group of people more single-mindedly embittered by an event than Seahawks fans and Super Bowl XL. "How dare those refs flag Darrell Jackson for pushing off Chris Hope directly in front of an official!?" "Calling Sean Locklear for a clear holding ...
Who's Sorry Now? Golf Edition
It's bad enough that your name is John Henry Isenhour III. But now word has leaked that you killed a protected species of hawk with a golf drive, on purpose, and there are criminal charges pending against you. Poor dumb sap. The only thing remaining of course is a phony, slapdash apology. Take it aw...
If Wilt's 100-Point Game Were Modernized
As we conclude another lazy "Baked Doritos and curling on TV" Sunday, we remember that 46 years ago was the night Wilt Chamberlain scored 100 points against the New York Knicks (snerk) in a game. And the Dayton Daily News poses a good question: how would it be covered today? Oh, there's nothing bett...