ted Page 269 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Jay Mariotti Arrested, Possible Domestic Disturbance (UPDATE)
Here's what the LA Times says about the overnight arrest ......

Private Stache: Roger Clemens Gets Intimate With Old Bush, For Once
As keeper of Sports Illustrated's indispensable Vault, Andy Gray spends a lot of his time sifting through the sports photography of another time, when athletes wore short shorts and facial hair, and everyone looked vaguely uncomfortable. Here is one such photo....

Nenad Krstic Was Arrested For Throwing That Chair
Following yesterday's basketbrawl at the Acropolis Tournament, Athens police arrested Nenad Krstic for his role in the fight since his chair hit Yannis Bouroussis, leaving Bouroussis with a "bloody wound on the side of his head." Plate-breakingly bizarre updates inside....

Did Poynter Go Too Far In Publishing Story Alleging That Deadspin Went Too Far?
The Dongbudsman is distinguished fellow in media ethics at the Deadspin Center for Excellence in Journalism and Penis Photography....

Manchester United Sign A Talented, Young Homeless Guy (UPDATE)
In a real life football reimagining of Charles Dickens's greatest novel-turned-musical, Oliver Twist, Sir Alex Ferguson has gotten all Mr Brownlow about it, and signed a former Homeless World Cup star for Man United....

This Is Probably Not Matt Kemp's Penis
Despite MediaTakeOut trumpeting this as the Dodgers outfielder choking up on his swing, we're dubious. And we've seen some athlete dong in our day....

Ten-Year Ban For Whipping Out His Junk
One of New Zealand's premier lawn bowlers is facing a decade-long ban from the sport after he "flopped out my old fella" to tell his teammates they were "playing like dicks." New Zealand's a strange, strange place....

A Brett Favre Musical Tribute: "See My Dong"
Words fail me. Here's a video that was just sent to our tips box: a little ditty called "See My Dong" to the tune of Lionel Richie's "All Night Long," which is just pure goddamn genius....

Javier Hernandez’s Face Scores Important Goal Against Chelsea
On your first day at work, it's all about keeping your head down, not attracting too much attention to yourself, and definitely not doing anything clumsy/humiliating....

Arrested Colts Lineman Was Drunk, Barefoot, Soiled, In A Ditch
Indianapolis police arrested Colts DT John Gill early Sunday morning after finding him passed out in a ditch, citing him as "disheveled and soiled" in the police report. [AP]...

Private Stache: Brett Favre And The Breakfast Of Champions
As keeper of Sports Illustrated's indispensable Vault, Andy Gray spends a lot of his time sifting through the sports photography of another time, when athletes wore short shorts and facial hair, and everyone looked vaguely uncomfortable. Here is one such photo....

Porno For Pyros In The Minors
Come out to the Savannah Sand Gnats game next Saturday. There'll be food giveaways, and live music, and, oh yeah, one lucky fan gets to light a man on fire....

"'Brett Favre Once Sent Me Cock Shots": Not A Love Story
Here’s another reason Brett Favre should stay retired this time: Turns out The Daily Line’s Jenn Sterger has kept a ridiculously disturbing (but HILARIOUS) secret about her interactions with The Gunslinger while they were both part of the Jets organization....

Mets Fan Eats It, Tastes Concourse
After the sixth inning of Friday's Mets-Diamondbacks tilt, SNY cameras caught a feathered-haired man assuredly stumbling down the concourse. What happened next was a master's class in "Confidence" and "Probably Too Drunk To Give A Shit." H/Ts Daniel and Jovan....

Private Stache: John-John And The Say Hey Kid Share A Tender Moment
As keeper of Sports Illustrated's indispensable Vault, Andy Gray spends a lot of his time sifting through the sports photography of another time, when athletes wore short shorts and facial hair, and everyone looked vaguely uncomfortable. Here is one such photo....

Young Man United Lad Scores A Really Lovely Goal
Tom Cleverley: remember the name. He scored a goal in the match against the MLS All Stars, which would be described in America as "awesome", or "win!", or "neat", or "rad"....

Martellus Bennett Becomes Latest Player To Have Dong Shots Exposed By Scorned Female
Last week, Cowboy beat reporters wondered why Bennett was absent from the first few days of mini-camp. Bennett admitted yesterday he sprained his ankle doing "jump-ball" drills. Today, a cellphone pic self-portrait of him posing in the shower arrives....

Capitals Stand By Their Man ... Unless He's a Junkie
When Joshua Robertson was 18, the Washington Capitals picked him in the fifth round of the NHL draft. When he was 25, the Whitman (Mass.) Police rounded him up for an admittedly heroin-fueled burglary streak....

Manchester United Jerseys Banned For Promoting Satanism
Forbes may have named Man U the most valuable franchise in sports, but they'll be getting a few less Malaysian ringgit. Muslim clerics have banned Man U jerseys in Malaysia because of their Red Devil crest....

When Notre Dame Football Players Get Arrested, Touchdown Jesus Weeps
Ain't no party like a South Bend party, cause by the time a South Bend house party gets stopped by police, someone's hand is going to get lacerated and some police officer's camera is going to take a mugshot of Joe Montana's son Nate....