tex Page 71 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
![Yu Darvish May Have Just One T-Shirt But It's A Homage To Weed, So Whatever [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17e8fd9llji0sjpg.jpg)
Yu Darvish May Have Just One T-Shirt But It's A Homage To Weed, So Whatever [Update]
Per tipster Greg McD, who watched today's installment of Intentional Talk on MLB Network, Texas Rangers pitcher Yu Darvish arrived at Spring Traning donning a T-shirt that speaks to his will to survive. And weed....

This Weekend In Naked Barely-Legal Cowgirl Driving News
"Meet Taylor Burnham. When Corpus Christi cops responded to a suspicious person call early Sunday, they spotted Burnham, 18, standing in an alleyway next to a Jeep Wrangler. The teenager was naked, except for a pair of cowboy boots. After spotting cops, Burnham hopped in the Jeep and took off at ar...

David Robinson Was Victimized By One Of The Great Videobombs Of All Time
NBA Hall-Of-Famer David Robinson decided to take in today's Kansas State-Texas game, but even at 7'1" his view could be blocked by an old woman who stood up when he was sitting. [ESPN]...

AccuWeather Predicts A One Hundred Percent Chance Of Derek Holland
Last night, Derek Holland dropped by News 8's studio to give Peter Delkus a hand with the weather forecasting. What followed was a clinic on how to be a goofball Major League Baseball player who reads the weather for a local news broadcast. Highlights include the weatherman—"meteorologist"—calling...

What Happened On The Night Josh Hamilton Had A Relapse, (Alleged) Bathroom Sex? One Eyewitness Account
We got an email this afternoon from a man who says he was at the same Dallas bar as Texas Rangers outfielder Josh Hamilton on the night Hamilton had a relapse and (allegedly) bathroom sex. Here's our source's version of events:...

Source: Someone Tried To Sell A Dallas TV Station A Josh Hamilton Sex Tape From The Night Of His Relapse
Someone is shopping a videotape allegedly showing Texas Rangers outfielder Josh Hamilton, on the night of his recent relapse, having sex in the bathroom of Sherlock's, a Dallas bar. A local television station was offered the tape for $41,000, an employee at the station tells us. The station declined...

Fax Machine Follies On Signing Day
We don't talk about national signing day much around these parts, unless there are pert coed rumps involved. Because the rest of it is pretty much all about fax machines. And no one likes or cares about fax machines, except office workers and rapt college football fans. Listen to Josh Levin, on this...

Josh Hamilton Apologizes And Admits He Had "Three Or Four" Drinks Monday Night
Hamilton joked, at a question-free press conference earlier today, that he wished he were there to talk about a contract. Alas. According to Jon Heyman, the Rangers also hired Hambone a new accountability coach after the incident Monday night. (Clarification: Hamilton also said he drank after those ...
![Report: Josh Hamilton Had An Alcohol-Related Relapse Earlier This Week [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/18j4mq2f6b713jpg.jpg)
Report: Josh Hamilton Had An Alcohol-Related Relapse Earlier This Week [UPDATE]
Rangers outfielder Josh Hamilton—the 2010 AL MVP and four-time All-Star whose battle with drug and alcohol addiction nearly ended his baseball career—had a relapse with alcohol at a Texas bar on Monday, reports Gerry Fraley of the Dallas Morning News. ...

Catching Up With Chris Brown, The Texans Super Bowl Champions Tattoo Guy
Remember Chris Brown? Sure you do. He's the supremely confident Texans fan who decided to get an irreversible reminder of a jarring lapse in judgment. As we settle in for the second half of the AFC Championship game, we turn to the Houston Press and are reminded just how jarring a lapse it was....

Yu Screwed Prince Fielder (Sort Of)
Your roundup of all the hottest hot-stove items of the day (and whatever shit Ken Rosenthal is throwing against the wall). This is ... HOT FUCKING STOVE!!!...

Oh Yu: A Collection Of Awful Yu Darvish Headline Puns
Japanese pitcher Yu Darvish officially signed to a six-year, $60 million deal with the Texas Rangers on Wednesday. Darvish, perhaps the most highly-touted player to ever come out of Japan, will be counted on to help shore up the Rangers' pitching staff following the loss of their former No. 1 starte...

Your NFL Playoffs Divisional Round Open Thread: Houston Texans at Baltimore Ravens
Welcome back for day two of the divisional round. As always, make yourselves comfortable down below in the comments....

Dirk Nowitzki Hits Milestone In Mavericks Win, Derek Holland Hits This Spliff, Man
Your morning roundup for Jan. 14, the day we learned birds just want to have fun. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Charles Barkley Is The Dongfather
Your morning roundup for Jan. 8, the day we learned that you can get a lot done in 15 days. Image via Mocksession. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Arian Foster's Touchdown Run Is Just Embarrassing For Chris Crocker
This twinkle-toed TD from the Houston Texans' Arian Foster made NFL safety Chris Crocker look more like internet celebrity Chris Crocker. Leave Chris Crocker alone! (The Texans won 31-10.) [NBC]...

NFL Wildcard Weekend Open Thread: Cincinnati Bengals at Houston Texans
The best weekend of the year is upon us. Two full days of real, non-ridiculous-sponsor-named-bowl game football. Here's your spot to revel in the wonder of it all....

Campaign Donation To Craig James Contains Hidden Message About Dead Hookers
Craig James for Senate has taken off with the force of a thousand suns. Texans, and people from all over the world, have donated literally tens of dollars to the James Train. Can anything stop this force of nature, besides unfounded but stubborn allegations from his past about dead prostitutes found...

HOLY SHIT JEFF GARCIA IS THE TEXANS' THIRD-STRING QB
We saw Jake Delhomme stumble through three quarters of Titans-Texans on Sunday after TJ Yates' injury, and we got to wondering who the Texans' third quarterback was. (You'll recall that Matts Schaub and Leinart are both out for the season.) We figured it was a reliable old guy, like Brian Griese, or...

Helmet-To-Helmet Tackles Are Especially Painful If You're Not Wearing A Helmet
Forgive Houston's Bryan Braman for trying to make an impact on the game and impress the Texans coaching staff, but the undrafted rookie from West Texas A & M ended up making an impression on his skull via impact with the helmet of Titans punt returner Marc Mariani. Top that, James Harrison. [CBS]...