the Page 522 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
<i>New York Times</i> Washes Justin Gimelstob's Balls, Sees No Issue With Balls-Washer's Conflict Of Interest
The New York Times publishing public-relations material serving the interests of Justin Gimelstob—a powerful figure in tennis whose conduct has over the years ranged from overtly misogynistic to violent and deranged, and who most recently made news by pleading no contest to charges that he hit a man...
It's Time To Vote In The Name Of The Year Elite Eight
Each March, we present the Name of the Year bracket to you in the neatest fashion we can muster. The seeding choices we make rank our naminees in the most ideal fashion we can envision. Were all of the higher seeds to conquer all of the lower seeds, it might be a boring tournament, but the result wo...
Let's Catch Up On The State Of The Marvel Cinematic Universe In Time For <i>Avengers: Endgame</i>
Hello friends! As you’re well aware by now, Avengers: Endgame opens in theaters this weekend, finally bringing to a—uh, well, not a close or a conclusion, but uh like some kind of large-scale branding transition for Disney and its Marvel Studios subsidiary, where they will arbitrarily plant a flag a...
The Sports Highlight Of The Day Is This Scottish Dog's Soccer Mastery
There are many dogs out there in the world who can fetch, or can, say, run after a kicked soccer ball and pounce on it while their owner yells, “Look, she’s playing soccer!” None of those dogs are nearly as cool as this Scottish pooch:...
Report: Michael Avenatti Paid For A Jet With $2.5M He Embezzled From A Settlement Hassan Whiteside Paid To His Ex-Girlfriend
The federal indictment against Michael Avenatti that accused the lawyer of stealing millions of dollars from his clients referred to the victims of his alleged financial crimes with numerical monikers (Client 1, 2, etc.). But thanks to a report from the Los Angeles Times, the identity of Client 2—wh...
Steve Yzerman Is Coming Back To Detroit, And It's About Friggin' Time!
It’s finally happening! Red Wings legend Steve Yzerman is spurning that lame expansion team in Seattle, and he’s ignoring lost franchises like the Rangers, and—of course—he kicked the Tampa Bay Chokemeisters to the curb, all so he could come home to Detroit. Yes, that thing that I knew in my heart o...
One Last Opening Day At A Dying Minor League Ballpark
WOODBRIDGE, Virginia — None of the elite members of the Washington, D.C. sporting press were on hand at Pfitzner Stadium to witness the home opener of the Class-A Advanced Potomac Nationals. It was probably for the best....
Dallas Keuchel And Craig Kimbrel Are Haunting The Baseball Season
Before Jason Vargas made his second start of the season on Saturday, beat reporters asked Mets manager Mickey Callaway what he expected from his team’s fifth starter. It was a reasonable question, given how badly Vargas has struggled over this season and the last, but also a difficult one to answer...
Vote In The Name Of The Year Sweet Sixteen
With plenty of real estate remaining in 2019, it’s masochistic to imagine what next year could look like. Emperor Trump? World Series champion Mariners? The mind reels! But whatever horrors might unfold in 2020, we have at least one pop culture stalwart to soothe ourselves in the post-Game of Throne...
Collin McHugh's Absurd Reflexes Save His Face From A Screaming Comebacker
Baseball is perhaps the only sport where an act of self-preservation can lead to some really cool shit. Astros pitcher Collin McHugh became the latest example of this phenomenon on Tuesday against the Athletics....
Someone Has To Clean Up After Broadway's Creative Destruction
If you are familiar with the still boyishly handsome but extremely serious actor Ethan Hawke, you know that when stage directions state that a character he’s portraying onstage wields a golf club and then is “seen smashing typewriter methodically,” Hawke will absolutely be smashing the shit out of a...
F.A. Panel Says Wayne Hennessey Is Too Stupid To Have Done Nazi Salute
No one could have been more delighted to hear that Crystal Palace goalkeeper Wayne Hennessey is apparently a huge idiot than Wayne Hennessey himself. That’s because the F.A. panel tasked with investigating a photo in which the Welsh keeper appeared to have been making a Nazi salute gesture cited tha...
Brand Digs Up Jackie Robinson's Corpse To Sell Beer
If people would stop accepting ads like this as being anything beyond an ad, there’s a chance they might stop being made that way. In the meantime, a brand used Jackie Robinson, who didn’t drink alcohol, according to his wife Rachel, and a two-toned baseball (yecccch) as a prompt to sell beer. They ...
Un-Fucking-Real
He was finished. He was disgraced, hobbled, and eaten alive by the ravages of both fame and time. His story was over; it was simply a matter how clumsily it would end and how long it would take for that end to finally arrive....
Tiger Woods Just Won The Fucking Masters
The illustrious green jacket is back on the shoulders of Tiger Woods for the first time since 2005. After battling the likes of Dustin Johnson, Brooks Koepka and Xander Schauffele all day, Woods won the whole damn thing with a score of -13. As if everything that had been building to this moment wasn...
Michael Avenatti Did Everything Wrong
You wouldn’t want a news cycle to pass without something to read about Michael Avenatti, and lord knows he wouldn’t either. Because he cares, and because he’s apparently been on an IRS watch list for a decade, that will never happen....
Bryson DeChambeau Foiled By Dumbass Stupid Flagstick And Dumbass Stupid Hole
Bryson DeChambeau leads the field after shooting six under par in the opening round of The Masters. Despite this, he has as much reason as anybody to feel bitter about how the course treated him on Thursday....
Name Of The Year Second-Round Voting: Part 2
My move from Brooklyn to Denver this past fall came with a number of advantages: better bike trails, more snowboard runs, and fewer Yankee fans, to name a few. But one thing I wasn’t expecting to find was a city in love with rodeo. The yeehaw agenda has been in full swing since long before Lil Nas X...
It's A Beer Commercial
Ahead of what could be Dwyane Wade’s final NBA home game tonight, a beer company released an advertisement highlighting the Miami Heat player and his generosity. Wade and his wife Gabrielle Union are well-known for their charitable work and activism: The basketball player has established a college s...
Name Of The Year Second-Round Voting Is Now Open
New Yorkers wishing to visit, or travel through, New Jersey have plenty of options. Among them are bridges: the George Washington, named after, um, George Washington; the Goethals, named after ... George Washington Goethals; and, finally, the Outerbridge Crossing. It is not named for the first presi...