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These Dumbass Robots In Sweaters Are Terrible At Skiing
Just an hour outside of Pyeongchang, scientists and students unleashed a small group of robot minions onto the slopes, much to the delight of the gathered populace. These bloodthirsty, unfeeling menaces may be able to turn a bit, but thankfully, they are horrible at skiing:...
Slovenian Snowboarder Tit Stante Has A Message For The World
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Report: David Samson Flipped When Julio The Octopus Accidentally Won The Marlins' Sea Creature Race<em></em>
This winter has held plenty in the way of absurd news about the Miami Marlins; it hasn’t even been two months since a full news cycle was devoted to Marlins Man complaining on the radio about his lack of invite to a season ticketholders’ meeting with Derek Jeter, ultimately receiving an invite to sa...
An Interview With A Good Boy
The 142nd annual Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show goes down today and tomorrow in New York City. In lieu of a preview, Deadspin arranged an exclusive sit-down with a 5-year-old black Labrador retriever named Zeal—one of the favorites in the obedience competition—and his owner, Petra Ford....
Your 2018 NBA Trade Deadline Roundup
Wow, what a frickin’ day. The NBA trade deadline came and passed, LeBron James traded half the players in the league for the other half, and there’s a lot of wreckage to sort through! As is tradition around here, we’re here to help out, with our in depth takes on each trade....
30 Years Ago, WWE Drew Their Biggest TV Audience Ever For "The Main Event"
On Feb. 5, 1988, 30 years ago this week, professional wrestling returned to prime time broadcast network television after a decades-long absence. WWE had been running semi-monthly Saturday Night’s Main Event specials in the Saturday Night Live time slot on NBC for almost three years before it got th...
Who Cares About The UFC In 2018?
The UFC has its problems, but one stands out as more serious and scary than the rest: Fewer and fewer people are interested in what it’s selling....
Before He Surrendered, Roberto Duran Was Looking To Harm
Originally published in Inside Sports (June, 1980), this story appears here with permission....
A Decade In Kenya Turned Two Teens From New Zealand Into World-Class Runners
The plan had seemed so simple when it was hatched in their mom’s basement. But as the plane was landing in Nairobi, the scabby ground growing closer, 18-year-old Zane leaned over to his twin brother and said, “Jake, what are we going to do?”...
Interim Panthers GM On Paid Leave After Ex-Wife Requests, Then Withdraws Domestic Violence Complaint
The Carolina Panthers placed interim general manager Marty Hurney on paid leave today after his ex-wife filed—then withdrew—a request for a domestic violence protective order. The request was first reported by the Charlotte Observer, which added that the protective order request also was denied by a...
Don't Ever Trust This Moron With Your Money
The guy who supposedly lives by the phrase “Don’t be a pussy” took the Super Bowl favorites and the under. Betting against Clay Travis works....
MMA Fighter Knocks Himself Out Trying To Throw His Opponent Down
At last night’s CES 48, Timothy Woods secured a leg lock on Tim Caron and tried to toss him to the mat. He succeeded in doing so, only the thing is, he misjudged the landing and speared himself onto the mat, neck first....
What Time Does 'What Time Does The Super Bowl Start?' Start?
Time is a social construct cooked up by humankind to impose some modicum of order onto an otherwise chaotic existence. But with that said, Super Bowl 52 will kick off this weekend. At some point. Who will win “the big game”? That’s not for me to say. What time does it start? Now there’s a good quest...
Let’s Talk About This Weird Pope Chair<em></em>
Folks, this week’s Deadcast was taped LIVE from gorgeous Saint Paul, Minnesota. People came! There was beer! I swear I’m not making any of this up....
Idiot On The Golf Course Gets Naked, Hops In Bunker, Throws Sand
A streaker fully embraced the Phoenix Open’s reputation as the most laidback event in golf by running on the course, doing some basic tumbling, jumping in a sand trap, and generally being an idiot during today’s pre-tournament pro-am. In all his naked glory:...
Someone Took Red Panda’s Unicycle
If you’re someone who goes to a lot of basketball games—professional or college—there’s a good chance you’ve seen Red Panda. Rong Niu, a native of China’s Shanxi province who performs as Red Panda, has an amazing act: She rides a seven-foot tall unicycle while balancing bowls on her head. She also k...
South Carolina Governor Desperately Wants To Find A Way To Fuck The National Anthem
If you’re in South Carolina on Super Bowl Sunday and you hear the national anthem start, stand up and yell every last word, or else the patriotism police will take you to the office of Governor Henry McMaster for a spanking. Today McMaster issued a proclamation, which means nothing, that everyone in...
Mark Dantonio And Tom Izzo Refuse To Accept Any Blame In MSU Sexual Assault Scandal
It’s been three days since an ESPN report painted a picture of Michigan State University as a school unable or unwilling to punish sexual abusers or rapists through any kind of accountable system, particularly when the accused were part of the football and men’s basketball teams. The looming publica...
The Very Real Daniel Cormier-Stipe Miocic Heavyweight Superfight Is Going To Rule So Hard
Daniel Cormier and Stipe Miocic both enjoy such dominance over their divisions (light heavyweight and heavyweight, respectively) that there aren’t really that many interesting opponents for either man to fight. Both won their UFC 220 title fights against overhyped power punchers with comical ease, a...