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This Andy Benoit Take About Russell Wilson Is So Fucking Stupid I Want To Die
You might remember Sports Illustrated’s resident tape-eater Andy Benoit from the time he proudly listed 15 backup stiffs better than Colin Kaepernick (and unironically included the likes of Brock Osweiler), or the time he said the Browns weren’t a joke because he watched the film on them, or the tim...

Huh, I Guess You Can Just Use A Normal Drill For This<em></em>
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Louisville Countersues Rick Pitino, Seeks Money Lost From NCAA Violations
The clusterfuck of Rick Pitino getting fired by Louisville amid an FBI corruption investigation is only getting more complicated. While Pitino has active suits open against his former school for wrongful termination and Adidas for intentional infliction of emotional distress, Louisville has now coun...

<i>The Black Stallion </i>Takes Film Back To Its Elemental Beginnings
Originally published in the April, 1980 issue of Chicago Magazine, featured in the new anthology, Movies That Mattered, it appears here with permission....

Amazing Online Hoax <em></em>Welcomes "Washington RedHawks" To The NFL
As a general rule, when the internet’s baking outer shitlands send aspiring creators of fake news, it isn’t sending us its best. It’s sending Destroy Belly Fat With One Weird Click fraudwads, it’s sending Macedonian click-hustlers and pinwheel-eyed domestic weirdos whose minds have been corroded by...

Dipshit Saints Fan Sues Team Over Anthem Protests
A Saints fan named Lee Dragna, who appears to be a real dumbass, has filed a lawsuit against the team seeking a refund for his season tickets. He wants the refund because his ability to enjoy Saints games has been ruined by the NFL’s anthem protests....

Rich People Demolished <i>L.A. Weekly</i> To Build The Future They Want For Journalism
In 2009, L.A. Weekly wrote a story about jerkin’—a dance craze sweeping across the Los Angeles basin—that highlighted the work of then little-known rapper YG. “He was so fresh out of prison, he still had ‘FREE YG!’ on his MySpace page,” the story’s author Jeff Weiss told me. It was one of the first ...

The 2017 Hater’s Guide To The Williams-Sonoma Catalog<em></em>
Oh! It’s you! My dearest, most refined holiday compatriot! My apologies, I didn’t see you were at the door....
![NFL Network Suspends Marshall Faulk, Ike Taylor, Heath Evans After Sexual Harassment Lawsuit [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/knd4lq0krgpyxoqlf7sf.jpg)
NFL Network Suspends Marshall Faulk, Ike Taylor, Heath Evans After Sexual Harassment Lawsuit [UPDATE]
NFL Network has suspended Marshall Faulk, Ike Taylor, and Heath Evans while investigating claims of sexual harassment from a lawsuit filed by one of their former colleagues....

Ball Brothers Sign With Tiny Lithuanian Club
LiAngelo and LaMelo Ball have reportedly signed professional contracts with a European team, just like LaVar Ball promised, and their destination is ... Lithuanian minnow Prienu Vytautas? Adrian Wojnarowski and Jonathan Givony first reported that talks were serious this afternoon and Woj protege Sha...

Lomachenko-Rigondeaux, High-Tech Dreams And Mechanical Reality
NEW YORK — On Saturday evening, midtown Manhattan was afflicted by plagues. A snowstorm had turned the crosswalks into slushy lagoons. SantaCon had drawn thousands of drunken Jersey residents dressed as Saint Nick into the city’s streets, where they yelled and WOOOO-ed and eroded the quality of life...

Lomachenko Vs. Rigondeaux Was Never Even Close To Competitive
Last night’s ESPN super fight was a strange one, even before the opening bell. A fighter moving up two weight classes for a fight isn’t especially uncommon; a 37-year-old fighter, whose style is mostly to not punch, moving up two weight classes to fight a man eight years his junior who has massive s...

What's The Best Way To Load A Dishwasher?
It’s a trick question. Or is it?...

Report: Feds Shut Down $2.5 Million NFL Survivor Pool Operation
The Feds this week busted up and shut down a sprawling NFL survivor pool operation with contests operating in the millions of dollars, according to a report from ESPN’s Darren Rovell. Ron Kronengold and Mike Bernstein reportedly ran several contests per year at Ron & Mike’s Football Pool over the co...

Another Title IX Coordinator Is Leaving Baylor
Another Title IX coordinator has resigned from Baylor University, making her the third person in a little more than a year to leave the office tasked with investigating reports of rape on campus, according to multiple local media reports. Baylor announced yesterday that Kristan Tucker is leaving the...

Impact Wrestling Tries To Earn Goodwill By Giving Up Matt Hardy's Gimmick
As part of its attempt to move on under new ownership and management, Impact Wrestling announced last week that it will be making new concessions to attract talent. After months of negative fan reaction when the company wouldn’t let Matt Hardy use his popular “Broken Matt” gimmick in WWE, Impact is...

Rick Pitino: I Was Publicly Humiliated By Papa John
Former Louisville head coach Rick Pitino is a busy man and, almost assuredly, a messy gentleman. While he may find himself jobless and ostracized for the time being, his schedule is booked full thanks to two separate lawsuits, both filed for spectacular reasons, and, now, a very public spat with Lou...

Vasyl Lomachenko Vs. Guillermo Rigondeaux Is Boxing Fuckery At Its Finest
Vasyl Lomachenko is a gizmo. “Hi-Tech” is a fitting sobriquet for the fighter whose ring style is a dizzying arsenal of bells, whistles, buzzers, beepers, and blinking lights....

Jahlil Okafor Can Finally Be A Basketball Player
Probably it is true that Jahlil Okafor won’t ever reclaim the promise that made him the third overall pick in the—holy shit, in the 2015 draft, it feels like it was a thousand years ago. Everyone’s been saying and writing it since then, and it’s truer now than ever: The sport as it is played in the ...

Furkan Korkmaz Enjoys Seven-Hour Assignment To Development League
Furkan Korkmaz continued his close personal relationship with the road between Philadephia and Newark today, demoted from the 76ers to the developmental league Delaware 87ers yet again. And then, seven hours later, promoted from the 87ers to the 76ers yet again. (Background information on this situa...