the Page 907 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

How To Get Arrested And Banned From Soccer: Pretend You're An Airplane!
Not just any airplane, mind you, but the one from the Munich air disaster which killed eight Manchester United players in 1958. So when a fan of Crawley Town was spotted making airplane gestures in a team-sponsored music video ahead of Crawley's FA Cup match against Man U, it caused some fuss....

A Nostalgic Look At Some Brilliant Goals From 1993-94
There's no real reason for this clip other than the fact it made The Spoiler weep salty tears of nostalgia — it's only the bloody Goal of the Season competition from 1994! And Matt Le Tissier didn't even win!...

The Real Ronaldo Decides To Call It A Day
The Spoiler was just a whipper-snapper when Ronaldo first came to our attention and he absolutely blew our tiny little mind. He was unbelievably strong, quick and skilful — he's what Jonah Lomu could've been if he'd not lived in New Zealand and made the right life choices....

Gilbert Arenas Talks About His "Bum" Of A Baby Mama And Dead Pet Sharks
In the wake of getting served with child-support papers at halftime of a Magic/Wizards game, Gilbert Arenas is rather perturbed about his baby mama Laura Govan's approach to public shaming. So says a source in the D.C. media, who was kind enough to share straight-from-the-mouth-of-Arenas thoughts o...

Connecticut Man Ordered To Publicly Apologize To Whale Mascot
Kevin O'Connell got drunk and went to the Connecticut Whale minor-league hockey game on Jan. 28. When he got there, he tackled and punched team mascot Pucky the Whale, who was greeting child fans. In court a few days later, he said he did so because of a bet....

From Bleacher Report To ProFootballTalk: A Brett Favre Non-Rumor Goes National
We've gotten the emails too: "Bret Favre to join Dancing With The Stars?" We ignored them until PFT posted the rumors early this morning. As fascinating as that would be, the tale of how the rumor made it this far is an even better story....

Pat Burrell Is The Machine. Fact.
In a post titled "Pat Burrell Says Hello!," BarStool Sports has seemingly put to rest any questions about the identity of Brian Wilson's special gimp-gear-laden pal, affectionately called The Machine....

There's A 14-Year-Old In Canada With A 39-Inch Vertical Leap
This young man is Jamar Ergas. He is in the eighth grade and can pull off a 360-degree dunk. Ergas will enter the ninth grade at Christian Faith Center Academy in Creedmore, N.C. next year and, barring any rule changes, will play one season of college basketball somewhere around the year 2015....

Holland’s Wesley Sneijder Scores A Pretty Goal Against Austria
Go on, admit it — you thought the international break for a load of pointless friendlies would be about as much fun as watching beige paint evaporate, didn't you? Well, to be honest, so did The Spoiler....

No, A Coach Donating His Kidney To A Player Isn't An NCAA Violation; Yes, They Had To Make Sure First
Wake Forest baseball coach Tom Walter donating one of his own kidneys to freshman player Kevin Jordan is one of the best stories we've heard in a long time. So we're not sure if it speaks more to our cynicism or the labyrinthine bylaws of the NCAA that we honestly wondered: does this violate anythin...

"Dear Pathetic, Ignorant Twats": The Duke/UNC War Of Words Heats Up
It's an annual tradition for the editors of the Duke Chronicle and the Daily Tar Heel to exchange trash talk letters in advance of their schools' first matchup of the season. We got them both, and boy, do the young minds of Tobacco Road have a way with words....

Who Wants To Watch Bear Bryant's Hat Get Chopped Up Into Little Pieces?
Panini America, which bought up the Donruss Trading Card Company in 2009, has released a video that details the extensive process of creating 100 memorabilia cards for distribution. This particular batch featured a thumbnail-sized swatch of fabric from one of Bear Bryant's old houndstooth hats. The ...

Potentially The Worst Miss In The History Of Ever?
Excuse us for being a bit late with this, but after reading Tim Vickery's always excellent South American football column on the BBC website, we thought we'd take a look at the miss of Ecuador Under-20 player Marlon de Jesus to see if it is as bad as he said....

Cardiff’s Craig Bellamy Scores A Brilliant Goal
See, there is good football being played in the lower divisions. It's not only the Premier League that produces the best games and the best players....

This Is What Happens When You Get Caught Stealing Someone's Shovel During A Blizzard (Video)
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day. ...

Let's Put Talk Of Dallas Weather...On Ice
Maybe you've heard that it is cold in Dallas, Tex. this week. Frigid, some say. Icy. Admittedly, dangerously icy. If not, here's a recap. It includes weather predictions for the 2014 Super Bowl, which, for all we know, could include Thundersnow....

DeSean Jackson: Renowned Punt Returner, Defender Of Bullied Children
DeSean Jackson's punt return once made a grown man strip and a Katie Bakes enter "the penultimate phase of depression"; after yesterday's appearance on The View with new pal "whoopi goldbird," he inspired a bullied child to cry in gratitude....

Jim Gray Doesn't Like Being Asked About His Sources
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Some Pussy In Oregon Picked The Packers To Win The Super Bowl
But the fact remains this: the last round of cats to battle for the right to play prognosticator probably ended up in a bag at the bottom of the Green River thanks to the degenerate gambler who believed the Oregon over Auburn pick....