ti Page 1023 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Pissbaby Duke Administrator Gets Baristas Fired For Listening To Rap Music [Update]

If you’ve ever spent time around people blessed with a particular combination of self-absorbtion and privilege, this story, from Indy Week, about a Duke administrator getting two campus baristas fired for daring to listen to rap music while on the job won’t really shock you. It will make you mad as ...

Royals Assault Defenseless Orioles Pitcher With Barrage Of First-Inning Dongs

Orioles pitcher Dylan Bundy had a very short Tuesday night start against the Royals, but his outing was anything but merciful. Bundy marked himself with the dreaded infinity ERA by failing to record an out in the first inning as Kansas City smashed dong after dong, scoring seven runs on Bundy off ho...

Matt Harvey Has To Be In Cincinnati Now<em></em>

I Beat Up My Own Brain At The American Crossword Puzzle Tournament

I once read an essay from which I can remember a single thing: that the author, a white man entering his forties, was no longer afraid to commit acts of minor to moderate civil disobedience in the service of righteous causes, or for just for shits-n-gigs. Send him to jail? Sure. Whatever he had to p...

Report: Blue Jays Closer Roberto Osuna Charged With Assaulting A Woman 

According to The Athletic and Sportsnet, Toronto Blue Jays closer Roberto Osuna was arrested early Tuesday morning and charged with one count of assault on a woman....

Police Report: Reuben Foster Broke Two Of Girlfriend's Cell Phones, Threw Her Dog Across The Room

The Sacramento Bee’s Matt Barrows obtained police reports and 911 calls that shed new light on what happened the morning of Feb. 11, when 49ers linebacker Reuben Foster was arrested and charged with felony domestic violence. The Santa Clara County District Attorney’s office said in a release last mo...

Rafael Nadal Catches Shit For Supporting Rival Soccer Clubs

Rafael Nadal is roughly midway through his clay-court rampage, having lengthened his consecutive set streak to a record 46, and just had some time off between tournaments in Barcelona and Madrid. He spent some of that precious downtime watching soccer, which he loves deeply....

Evgenia Medvedeva Leaves Longtime Coach To Train With Brian Orser In Canada

Evgenia Medvedeva, arguably the most successful figure skater of the last quad with back-to-back world titles and the Olympic silver medal in Pyeongchang, is leaving her longtime coach, Eteri Tutberidze, to train with Canadian Brian Orser....

Hafþór Björnsson Is Officially The World's Strongest Man

Hafþór Björnsson, who portrays Gregor Clegane on Game of Thrones, was the world’s second strongest man last year—not without controversy—but in this year’s competition in Manila, he finally reached the top of the mountain....

You Check Ben Simmons The Same Way You Defend A Campsite

When I look at Philadelphia 76ers guard Ben Simmons, I see a very tall and extremely talented young basketball player with a resting dick face and no jump shot. When Boston Celtics coach Brad Stevens looks at him, he sees a curious foraging bear. For this reason, he is a basketball coaching genius....

Max Scherzer Is A Fire-Breathing Dragon

The marquee pitching matchup of the day had former Cy Young winners Max Scherzer and Jake Arrieta pitching the rubber match of the Phillies-Nationals series. Arrieta was fine—he allowed a run on two hits and two walks in six innings—but Mad Max was downright historic:...

Pedro Florimon Ruins The Nationals With Slick Glove Fake-Out

Phillies starter Vince Velasquez and four relievers held a banged-up and disappointing Nationals lineup to just two hits in Saturday’s 3-1 Phillies victory. The Nats engineered eight walks in the game, but left eight runners on base and were 0-3 with runners in scoring position. They did, however, p...

Brandon Williams, Who Recently De-Committed From Arizona, Commits To Arizona

Top high school player Brandon Williams de-committed from Arizona back in early March, citing the “current climate surrounding U of A” in the wake of ESPN’s report of Wildcats coach Sean Miller being caught via FBI wiretap offering money to then-recruit DeAndre Ayton. The climate must’ve changed, be...

Celtics Take 3-0 Series Lead After Sixers Choke Repeatedly 

It’s not that the Sixers are dumb. They’re not. They are, in fact, quite tough and disciplined. But it is also true that their best players are children, and they are playing a series against one of the very sharpest, most wisely and meticulously coached NBA teams you will ever see. And the conseque...

Marco Belinelli<em></em> Buzzer-Beater Extends Game Three After Sixers Nearly Throw Season Away

Marco Belinelli’s fade-away buzzer-beater forced overtime against the Celtics after a J.J. Redick turnover left the Sixers looking at a 3-0 series deficit before the Italian’s heroics....

Justify Wins Kentucky Derby, Breaks Curse Of Apollo

Undefeated Justify continued his win streak and became the first horse since 1882 to win the Kentucky Derby without racing as a two-year-old by reaching the wire in an unofficial time of 2:04.20 to seize the roses and claim a legitimate chance for the Triple Crown....

Holy Shit, Joel Embiid Dunked Aron Baynes Off The Face Of The Earth

Aron Baynes has to retire now, those are the rules....

Every Force In The Universe Conspires To Cruelly Thwart Golfer's Eagle Approach Shot

You are not going to do a whole lot of mourning for a golfer because he narrowly missed an eagle—first of all it’s golf, and second of all, you tap in for birdie a shot later and that’s about the best anyone can realistically hope for in this awful world. But this, man, this shot, from Peter Malnati...

Bryce Harper Makes For One Badass Leadoff Hitter

New Nationals manager Dave Martinez moved Bryce Harper to the leadoff spot on May 1, with the Nationals sitting at a disappointing 13-16 on the season and mired in an offensive slump that saw the team produce more than four runs in a game just once over its previous nine games....

Emma Baccellieri Tracker: Emma Baccellieri To Leave Deadspin, Plus Hot Fresh Anagrams

Staff writer and heinous Duke fan Emma Baccellieri has been minding the night shift around here for about two years now. We’re sad to report that this is her last day at Deadspin, and that she will be leaving us to go work at Sports Illustrated, a once-prestigious publication that now functions as a...