ti Page 1359 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Today's Florida-Alabama Game Thus Far, In One Vine
I believe the word is "madcap."...
Stay In Your Goal, Goalie
Atlético Madrid goalie Miguel Ángel Moyà gets a little carried away with his creep toward the far post, not believing that there's a scoring chance to be had. But he was not counting on the combination of Pablo Hernández's left heel and imagination. That's a beaut, right there....
James Rodríguez Opens La Liga Account With Beautifully Struck Goal
Real Madrid president Florentino Pérez may not have any understanding of soccer tactics, but he does know flash when he sees it, and Colombian World Cup standout James Rodríguez is certainly flashy. With Madrid up 1-0 in today's game against Deportivo La Coruña, Rodríguez took a pass from Karim Be...
Athletics South Africa Begs, Pleads For Mercy
No two ways about it, the governing body of track and field in South Africa has made itself into one big international boob. Nothing new there. But a recent lawsuit by a former athlete is threatening to take it to the cleaners, and Athletics South Africa, the country's governing body of sport, is be...
Jameis Winston's Status Revised, Now Suspended For Entire Clemson Game
Florida State's administration suspended Jameis Winston for the first half of tomorrow's Clemson game earlier this week after engaging in the public execution of a meme. Now, after having time to think about it, interim FSU president Garnett Stokes and AD Stan Wilcox have decided to bench the Heisma...
UFC Cuts Alleged Woman Beater Thiago Silva After Video Surfaces
UFC's leaders have changed their minds—again—and dumped light heavyweight Thiago Silva today after welcoming him back just two weeks ago....
ESPN: Rice Believes Ravens Owner Tried To Bribe Him In Coverup Attempt
ESPN's Outside The Lines just dropped a doozy of a story about the handling of the Ray Rice domestic violence incident. It's a long and thoroughly reported piece, centering mainly on the Ravens' end of the investigation, but the big bullet points are these: Baltimore Ravens owner Steve Bisciotti, ...
Derek Jeter Ass-Eating Gossip We Really Want To Be True
Today, a tipster sent us a bit of gossip about Derek Jeter's sex life that comes from what he claims to be a very reliable source. This gossip is likely no more true than similar stories we've come across in the past, but we really, really want it to be true. ...
That Stupid Derek Jeter Ad Will Make You Cry For America
On Thursday, The Gatorade Company Inc.—a marketing shop with a secondary concern in the manufacture and distribution of sweetened salt water—released an advertisement featuring Derek Jeter, one of the worst players in baseball....
Goodell: I Suck At My Job. Now Trust Me.
NFL commissioner Roger Goodell, from whom we hadn't heard in quite some time, addressed the media just now, first reading a long, boring statement and then spending a bit more than a half-hour saying nothing whatever of substance in answering questions from reporters. The general impression he gave ...
Protestor Invades Goodell Presser, Screaming About An Elevator [UPDATE]
How well is Roger Goodell's presser going today? A screaming protestor, fearful that he might have to go into an elevator, interrupted it. ...
McDonald's Is Poisoning iPhone-Line Denizens With Food From McDonald's
Man, Apple customers get all the free shit lately. ...
This Russian Soccer Brawl Goes From 0 To 100 Real Quick
As more proof that there's nothing Russians don't think would be improved by spontaneous kickboxing bouts, here's a video of two youth soccer teams fucking each other up after only the slightest provocation....
Real Madrid President: I'm Stupid, Not Crooked
It's maybe a little disconcerting when the president of the richest club in the world—the brains behind all significant player transfers coming in and out, a man so determined to fulfill his dream of a star-studded lineup that he'll jettison the one player that makes his team work in favor of a bigg...
A Whole Lot Of Ravens Fans Turned Up To Exchange Their Ray Rice Jerseys
Today is the day that Baltimore Ravens fans can go to M&T Bank Stadium to exchange their Ray Rice jerseys for another Ravens jersey of their choice. Based on photos from the stadium, a lot of people are taking advantage of this deal....
How I Let Go Of My NFL Career
Excerpted from the new epilogue to Slow Getting Up: A Story of NFL Survival from the Bottom of the Pile, now available in paperback. We published an adaptation from the book last year....
Cheerlessly, Asian Games Begin
The Olympic-style Asian Games open today in Incheon, South Korea, providing a flag-spangled stage on which to celebrate the universal sport of politics. North Korea has reestablished its dominance in this arena by first deploying, then withdrawing, their newest weapon—feminine charm....
The Royals' First-Ever Online Playoff Ticket Sale Didn't Go So Well
If you think you bought Royals playoff tickets today in anticipation of K.C.'s likely berth, you should probably check again. This sounds ominous:...
Darren Rovell Can't Tell A Two From A Five
Darren Rovell is a petty dickhead. Because people make so many jokes about how he is a money-grubbing, soulless, post-human shill for rich old men and corporations, his sheer petty dickheadedness can go underappreciated, but it's really what defines him, which is why the very best Rovell stories i...