ti Page 1742 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Funbag Bonus: Did The Chilean Miners Masturbate?
The Chilean miners were all rescued, free now to breathe in air and have their medical benefits cut off three weeks from now. But screw that: Wuz they jackin' it?...

Kevin Martin: Shooting Guard, Housing Bubble Burstee
Kevin Martin—who will earn $10.6 million this season—has an unorthodox shooting motion and it appears an unorthodox method of paying his mortgage—not paying it. He's defaulted on the loan for his house in suburban Sacramento. [Sacramento Bee]...

Tiger's Women Going After Each Other Now
Today, in People Who Should Go Away Who Won't Go Away: The LAPD is investigating a death threat to Joslyn James allegedly sent by Devon James after the two did a porno together. In related news......

You Can't Write A Pot Story About The NBA Without Including Michael Beasley
The following is an excerpt from High Times magazine's story "Pot and the NBA," found in the December issue of America's favorite dank rag. Super Cool Beas, indeed....

The Taiwanese Animation Version Of The Brett Favre Scandal We've All Been Waiting For
Brett Favre's penis is the gift that keeps on giving, isn't it? There's nothing quite like Taiwanese news outlets animating stories to let you know what you're covering is news. And nothing quite like using "offensive tackle" as a euphemism. [NMA.tv]...

Lincecum-Halladay Billed As "Matchup For The Ages," A "Pitching Classic"
Elsewhere, A.J. Burnett hits two batters in a Yankees' simulation game. Here's your evening update on the NLCS/ALCS pitching rotations....

Chinese National Basketball Team Karate-Kicks Brazil Off Court In International Friendly
The Chinese men's national basketball team apologized today for its most recent on-court brawl, in a designated "friendly" match against Brazil on Tuesday. Players and coaches blame it on bad calls — all within the first sixty-six seconds of play....

Josh Hamilton's Ginger Ale Spray Down Has Been Documented On Video
The Rangers did a nice thing for their teetotaling-teammate Josh Hamilton last night—because, well, you know—showering their star slugger in a veritable avalanche of crisp, crisp ginger ale. ...

Grow Up and Drink Something Fancy, Manly
You've moved out of Mom's basement, so it's time to order something at the bar that doesn't come in size "yard." Try a Rusty Nail. It's fancy and manly, and an 18th-century rebel prince ran from England to Scotland with the recipe for Drambuie in his knickers—all so you could enjoy this very cocktai...

Well, This is Just Sad In Every Way: Tommie Smith To Sell His Gold Medal
Forty-two years ago, Smith set a world record in the 200 meters. On the podium, he and John Carlos raised their fists, in what would become an enduring symbol of the Olympics and the Civil Rights movement. Everything has a price....

Lionel Messi’s Goals Look Just As Good Written Down
Here's the original version if you like your words to come with moving pictures....

Scary, Ski-Masked Serbian Homophobes Disrupt Euro Cup Qualifier
Tuesday's Italy-Serbia Euro qualifier was called before it began when rioters, protesting the Serbian government's offer to protect a gay pride parade, burned flags, lit flares, and did other rioty things. [SB Nation]...

Nick Swardson Is a Friend to Gay Robots and Wheelchair-Bound Cats Alike
Watch him embody the spirit of weird in his brand-new Comedy Central sketch show Nick Swardson’s Pretend Time. Witness him as Lady Gaga’s brother Garry, a cop who shares his sister’s sartorial gene, work the mean streets in lace tranny sleeves....

Foul Ball Girl Runs Afoul Of The Law
And you thought you'd heard the last of Sara Saco-Vertiz, she of the Foul Ball Couple that captured America's hearts for a few brief weeks back in the summer of '10. She's back, drinking underage at Universal Studios Orlando....

Man Gets Full Football Jersey Tattoo To Honor Team Icon
The poor bastard in the chair is Felipe Alvarez, an Atletico Nacional supporter who has decided to pay homage to murdered club legend Andres Escobar by having a replica Atletico shirt tattooed across his torso, complete with Escobar's number on the back....

Giants Take NLDS, Fans Decide It's A Good Time To Cover "Don't Stop Believin'"
If sports movies and uplifting soft-rock songs make you tear up, this rendition of "Don't Stop Believin'" may get you all Favrey....

The Carlton Dance Makes NFL Debut (Update)
Lions cornerback Alphonso Smith jumped this Sam Bradford pass and took it to the house, scoring six football points and infinity ridiculous dance points when he broke out everyone's favorite mid-'90s dance—"The Carlton Dance"—in the end zone....

Montenegro Striker Loses His Shorts In Goal Celebration
Montenegro met Switzerland in Euro 2012 qualifying on Friday with Roma striker Mirko Vucinic scoring the only goal of the game, a dinked 68' finish....

Weekend Winner: Big Ten Gamblers And Conspiracy Theories
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like the Wisconsin Badgers, who were up 25 with 6 minutes left, and went for two. It didn't please Minnesota, but it pleased some people with money on the game....

Why Is Someone Who's Purportedly Pacman Jones In Handcuffs Again? (UPDATED)
According to cincinnati.247.sports, "the car [Pacman Jones] was driving was forced off the road and onto the sidewalk by another car. As a result Jones apparently hit a pedestrian....