ti Page 1745 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Athlete Goes To School Where Athletes Get Laid
The class of 2011's top recruit has committed to Duke. I WONDER WHY....

Last Night's Winner: Pedro Martinez, The Only Tolerable Part Of Ken Burns's <em>Tenth Inning</em>
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Pedro Martinez, whose small bit of screen-time yesterday was the only part of Ken Burns's sad-bugle-and-Bob-Costas extravaganza that was worth a damn....

For Sale: Tiger Woods Sex Tape: $350,000
That's what Mistress # +/- 11, Devon James, claims is the cost for 67 minutes of filthy coitus between her and Eldrick (and a third party) from 2008. She claims if Vivid doesn't buy it, she'll release it independently. [RadarOnline]...

NFL Superperson Ray Lewis Runs with the Bears. Well, a Bear.
And the bear matches the superperson stride for stride. Then it smiles. Then it talks! Then something blows up. Even though they just ran the length of a football field, the bear and the superperson smell fresh and snappy because of Old Spice Showtime Deodorant....

What The Fuck Are We Supposed To Do With Judah Friedlander?
Greetings, faceless demographic. So the folks at HarperCollins are trying to promote Judah Friedlander's book "How To Beat Up Anybody" and I'm having trouble trying to figure out how to promote it. It doesn't help that the publicist lady referred to the site as "Deadpin" several times....

Pat Tillman's Brother: "I Wish He Would've Just Lit These Fucking Idiots Up With His Own Gun"
Richard Tillman appeared on Real Time With Bill Maher over the weekend, and, like the rest of his family, Richard still plainly refuses to grieve in the officially sanctioned manner. It's maybe the only life-affirming thing about the whole affair....

Lions Player Holds Up One More Finger Than His Team Has Wins
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Let's See What Happens When A Baltimore Oriole Meets A Flight Attendant
And now, a feel-good post to close the day....

Here's A Video In Which Tim Lincecum Seemingly Says The Ball Is Juiced
This meeting of the Deadspin Lip-Reading Team is called to order. It starts at roughly 24 seconds of this video which will likely disappear with the quickness so get on it, yo....

N.Y. Daily News Still Pissed At Flyers Fans Who Booed Grizzly Mom
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Will Someone Please Help Jose Canseco Get His Decorative Light Fixtures Back?
There is so much compressed sadness in this one tweet that I think we can now upgrade Jose Canseco from professional sad sack to existential hero. I mean, at this point would you be at all surprised if his next tweet were, "woke up from uneazy dreams now ima bug ,help"?...

The One Where A Lady Sends Us Pictures Of Her Boobs In The Hope Of Getting A Job (NSFW)
Welcome back to Deleted Scenes. If you're new, read this to figure out what we do here. If not, well, let's get down to business. (NSFW)...

Fall Is Here So Groom Yourself, For God's Sake
Dude, no one's buying the "bangin'" scraggle you grew at Burning Man. It's back to school for you and your facial hair! Craft your perfect fall stubble or beard (from 1/64" up to 23/32") with the Philips Norelco Vacuum Stubble and Beard Trimmer Pro....

Hockey To Get The <i>Hard Knocks</i> Treatment Too
HBO will film the Capitals and Penguins this December for a four-episode Hard Knocks-esque miniseries. Will there be Ryanian pottymouthage? "You might hear some salty language with a little Canadian or Russian flair," said a network exec. моргала выколю, падла!...

Leave Wayne Rooney Alone Now, Hints Sir Alex Ferguson
Kids, there is a big lesson here. Reach for the stars, by all means, but once there, don't mess it all up by prowling for threesomes when your glamourous wife isn't looking....

Dead Political Journalism Of The Week: <em>The New York Times</em> On Linda McMahon
The New York Times's Matt Bai tediously tries to answer the question no one anywhere is asking: "Can Linda McMahon Win in a State That Defines Preppy?"...

Hey, Please Thank Fire Joe Morgan Again For Making Yesterday Wonderful
Remember how much fun you had yesterday watching Fire Joe Morgan eviscerate all of those poor, poor sports journalists? Yeah, if you could help them help people with cancer, it'd be much appreciated....

David Beckham Probably Didn't Sleep With That Prostitute
That lady at the store, maybe. That secretary, probably. But Becks says a US tabloid rag is totally off the mark when it comes to this $10,000-a-night call girl. Because, c'mon, 10 grand for her?...

Bengals Turn Into Actual Tigers After Satanic Pact, Maul Steelers. Yeah.
Yeah, I don't really know what else to add to this. [ILX, h/t Jovan J.]...