tim Page 206 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Last Night's Winner: Slightly Less-Sudden Death
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like those who love to complain about the NFL's overtime system and have now been appeased....with something else to complain about....

After Attempted Combine Prayer, Tebow Told To "Shut The Fuck Up"
Tebow reportedly requested the room bow their heads in prayer before the Wonderlic. Another player reportedly told him to "shut the fuck up." The nation reportedly offers a brofist. [PFT]...

Gators WR Excited For Passes Aimed Above His Knees
Deonte Thompson is not too sad about transitioning from Tim Tebow to John Brantley: "You know what I mean, a real quarterback." But how is Brantley's relationship with Jesus? [Orlando Sentinel]...

Tebow Draft Rationalization Watch: The Rams Are Nothing If Not Efficient
As the NFL Draft approaches, many team fanbases stat nerds will attempt complex logical gymnastics to talk themselves into using a first-round pick on Florida quarterback Tim Tebow. Today: Numbers don't lie, dummy....

The Best Thing You'll Read About Tiger's Sexting
What could Joslyn James have written to elicit Tiger's, "Hold you down while i choke you and Fuck that ass that i own"? Perhaps: "My screenplay really isn't coming together. Need some dialogue for the enraged donkey-owning farmer." [Slate]...

How Cute, He Throws Just Like A Real Quarterback!
Tim Tebow revealed his new throwing motion today, only five weeks ahead of the draft. If you think that should throw up some red flags for GMs with a first-round pick, well, you don't know NFL GMs....

Whining Time: Reggie Miller, The Knicks, And The Prayer Of The Bitchy Girl
A review of ESPN's Winning Time: Reggie Miller vs. the New York Knicks, from a woman who once took a photo with John Starks and keeps it at her desk, and now co-workers think they're married....

Tebow Draft Rationalization Watch: The 49ers Like "Winners"
As the NFL Draft approaches, many team fanbases will attempt complex logical gymnastics to talk themselves into using a first-round pick on Florida quarterback Tim Tebow. Today: 49ers coach Mike Singletary seeks a younger version of Mike Singletary....

Tebow Draft Rationalization Watch: Pittsburgh Needs A Leader
As the NFL Draft approaches, many team fanbases will attempt complex logical gymnastics to talk themselves into using a first-round pick on Florida quarterback Tim Tebow. Today: The Steelers try to solve their current quarterback's character issues....

Tim Tebow's Signature Will Save Our Economy
The world's greatest undrafted free agent held his first "official" autograph signing last weekend and since he's no longer an amateur, his signature will now cost you a pretty penny. Or $160 if you want to get technical about it....

CFL Slowly Morphing Into XFL
Get rid of sudden death? We'll get rid of extra points. The CFL attempts to out-excitement the NFL yet again, this time considering making the the two-point conversion mandatory in overtime. But what about the rouge?! [TSN]...

Tim Lincecum Isn't Always High, He Just Seems That Way
Here's Lincecum modeling a Giants Snuggie, and pretending to be a wizard. Wonder if this violates his probation for that possession bust....

Great Caption Fail, Or Greatest Caption Fail?
The Times again shows their conservative bias by mislabeling a photo that's definitely not Hillary Clinton. And probably not Michelle Bachelet, either....

Tim Tebow At The Combine: A Revelation, Set To Iron Maiden
As you know, Tebow impressed at the NFL Scouting Combine, running the three-cone drill in a hell-blazing 6.66 seconds. (It's the second coming! Of Mike Alstott!) Here's video of Tebow's big day, set to Iron Maiden's "Number of the Beast."...

Tim Tebow False Messiah Watch: Antichrist Edition
With apologies to Slate, the Tim Tebow False Messiah Watch is our occasional look at the growing body of evidence - quotes, signs and wonders, excessively fawning prose - that the Florida quarterback is the Beast....

Three Questions About The NFL's New Overtime System
So the league appears to finally be changing the overtime rules. At first glance, the proposal is much better than the old sudden death. But then we got to wondering....

Al Jefferson Busted For DWI, Maybe Definitely
Certainly, some Al Jefferson with the same birthday as the Wolves center got pulled over and charged with a DWI last night. If Rand says it's so, then it's so. [Hennepin County Sheriff]...

Tim Tebow Messiah Watch: Money Changers Edition
With apologies to Slate, the Tim Tebow Messiah Watch is our occasional look at the growing body of evidence - quotes, signs and wonders, excessively fawning prose - that the Florida quarterback is the Lamb of God....

The Glory Of Tebow Shall Not Be Revealed To The Apostates
Fresh off news that Tebow won't show off his arm for scouts at the NFL combine, now comes word that he won't participate in any drills. You know how a really bad movie won't be screened for critics? Yeah....

The Olympics Have Daddy Issues
Slate's Sap-o-Meter reports: "Cumulatively, the words father, dad, and son were uttered a staggering 47 times between Friday and Sunday," largely on the strength of an Apolo Ohno feature. The Winter Olympics are the new baseball. [Slate]...