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To Watch Tonight
What to watch while ducking that tank containing toxic ammonia... • NBA: Minnesota @ Oklahoma City, 7 p.m. [FSN] • NHL: Calgary @ Anaheim, 8 p.m. [Rogers Sportsnet] • NHL: San Jose @ Colorado, 8 p.m. [CSBA] • CFB: East Carolina at Central Florida, 8:15 p.m. [ESPN] • NFL: New England at Indianapolis,...

ESPN Jerks Bill Simmons Around, Yet Again
If you're a regular reader of ESPN.com, you probably noticed that Bill Simmons's NFL picks column didn't hit the web this past Friday. Well, according to the Sports Fella, ESPN elected not to publish it. The tension between Simmons and his employer, ESPN, has been well documented and the latest bit...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while thinking up an even more awesome Halloween costume for next year ... • CFB: Washington at Southern California, 6:30 p.m. [FSN] • CFB: Tennessee at South Carolina, 7 p.m. [ESPN2] • CFB: Texas at Texas Tech, 8 p.m. [ABC] • CFB: Nebraska at Oklahoma, 8 p.m. [ESPN] • NBA: Cleveland ...

Next Game, the Knicks Won't Even Let Stephon Marbury Onto the Team Bus
Once again, the NBA's highest paid bench-warmer did not take part in the Greek tragedy that is otherwise known as New York Knickerbockers basketball. After conferring with head coach Mike D'Antoni at the team's hotel in Philadelphia last night, Stephon Marbury and his annual salary of $21.9 million...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while you wait for animals to attack your pumpkins ... • College Football: Wofford Terriers at Appalachian State Mountaineers (8:00 p.m., ET) Double the A's equal double the fun! [ESPN2] • NBA: Chicago Bulls at Boston Celtics (8:00 p.m., ET) Derrick Rose cured my acne with a well-place...

Guess Which Country Is Acting Racist Again? Si
What you see here is a screen capture of a web site created by a Spanish Formula One fan (now since removed, it seems), entitled Pincha la Rueda de Hamilton. That's Spanish for Burst Hamilton's Tires. The idea is for visitors of the site to place nails, pins and even freakin' porcupines on the track...

College Football Preview: The Jort-Out Is Coming
In a move reminiscent of the final rap contest between Rabbit and Papa Doc, Florida fans have embraced their greatest flaw: the you wear jorts insult that Georgia fans have been hurling for the better part of a decade. Yep, there's an organized movement afoot for Gator fans to show up in jorts for t...

Dispatches From The Phillies Victory Parade
Breaking News: We have a Daulerio sighting. Your Deadspin editor has been spotted at the Locust Bar at 235 S 10th St., engaged in drunken post-parade revelry with someone named Jim (and later, I'm sure, to be known as "Suspect B"). A courageous reader sent this cell phone shot at great personal risk...

Intolerable Ballpark Abuse: Featuring Drunkeness, Assault, And The Cutting Insults Of Von Hayes
Once upon a time, a site called The Black Table had a regular feature entitled Waxing Off, in which women gathered in an online roundtable to discuss issues of the day, and also to make fun of Will Leitch's shoes. And so we got to thinking: With so many great female sports bloggers out there, why no...

Casting The Movie "11 To 1: The Avella High School Football Story"
If this true life film isn't on the Disney release schedule by Christmas 2010, then I will move to Western Pennsylvania and start a high school football team myself. It's the tale of tiny Avella High School, in the cradle of football Eden, where their local gridiron gang lost all nine games this sea...

Seven-Year-Old Football Fan Meets Erin Andrews, Inspires A Nation (With Video)
Imagine this scene: You're seven years old and attending your first big-time college football game. Your dad has gotten you seats in the front row, you've got the jersey, you've even painted your face. Your team is upsetting a ranked opponent in primetime and driving for another touchdown. The ball ...

Knicks Fans Love Affair With Mike D'Antoni Lasts Three Quarters
After what seemed like four decades of frustration with managerial incompetence, New York Knicks fans were finally liberated from the shackles of the Isiah Thomas Era and were rewarded with the free-wheeling Mike D'Antoni, a guy with actual playoff wins on his resume. Everything is going to be fine!...

30 Previews In 30 Days: The Washington Wizards
The NBA season has started! And this is the last team we have to preview! They are: The Washington Bullets Wizards. When last we saw them: Finished 43-39, second in the Southeast Division and fifth overall in the East. Suffered what is becoming their annual "Elimination by the Cleveland Cavaliers" i...

Boston Fans And Players Keeping It Classy As Fackin’ EVAH!
Hey, here’s a charming picture from the Celtics ring ceremony on Tuesday night. On the left is current Celtic, drug-doer, and student of the Norv Turner Institute Of Skin Care, Scot Pollard. Scot is flashing his championship ring, because the Celts certainly couldn’t have won a title without the th...

World Series Game Five Live Blog 33-1/3: The Final Insult
Last time on "World Series Test Cricket," our Philadelphia Phillies and Tampa Bay Rays were tied 2-2 in the middle of the 6th inning. Please slip on the underwear you adorned on Tuesday (or, if you want to be accurate, Monday) and jump like it's October 27th. * * *Top 9th 3 ...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while you wrap your mouth around this baby ... • MLB: World Series, Game 5, Part 2, Electric Boogaloo: Tampa Bay Rays at Philadelphia Phillies (8:00 p.m., ET) Why don't we pick this up again next May, when it's nice and warm? [Fox] • Politics: Barack Obama Political Message (8:00 p.m.,...

Houston, We Have A Compound Fracture
As someone old enough to remember seeing "The Theisman Incident" on live TV, I like to consider myself an aficionado of horrifying bone-melting leg injuries. If you were watching the gridiron donnybrook between Houston and Marshall last night—and really, why would you be?—you witnessed one that will...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while you wonder what your wife ever saw in that murderer ... at the prison where you are the warden ... • MLB: World Series, Game 5: Tampa Bay Rays at Philadelphia Phillies (8:00 p.m., ET) Eh, what's another 24 hours? [Fox] • Nostalgia: "It's The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown" (8:00 p....

New Guitar Hero Ad Gives You A Whole New Reason To Hate Tom Cruise
We mentioned this only in passing last week, because a) it was Friday afternoon, b) we didn't have an embeddable version of the video yet, and c) it's pretty embarrassing for everyone involved, including the viewer. You've probably seen Alex Rodriguez, Tony Hawk, Michael Phelps and Kobe Bryant bring...

The Machines Shall Rise, And All Will Fall
All right, so the world is imploding. You know this. I know this too, though only because the Wassup Guys told me. Surely, these are the last days, before the global apocalypse rids the planet of humans and leaves only some cockroaches, a few stray strands of hair and, of course, Kermit, because Ke...