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Jamboroo, Week 9: The Budding Legend Of Derek "Horse Balls" Anderson
Big Daddy Drew's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo previews the upcoming weekend of the NFL every, well, every Thursday afternoon....
Why Steroids Make You Strong And More Famous
Just in case anyone forgot: Rafael Palmeiro tests positive for a steroid and an entire Hall of Fame career is destroyed. Rick Ankiel is prescribed HGH by a doctor when it's neither illegal nor banned by baseball, and he's a disgrace to the story we all once admired. Jaguars defensive end Marcus Stro...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as local punks egg your car ... • NBA: Dallas at Cleveland; Seattle at Denver. No Jub Jub? [ESPN] • NHL: Hurricanes at Panthers. Baby it's cold inside. [Fox Sports] • Movie: Poltergeist. You moved the headstones but you didn't move the bodies! You didn't move the bodies! [ABC FAM]...
Baseball Remains SO Tough On Steroids
The New York Times this morning confirmed something we all pretty much suspected: Baseball's steroid "tests" are so easy to usurp and foil that you'd have to be an idiot to fail one. (Or Mike Cameron.)...
You Can Be A-Rod, For A Day
We remember, back in 2000, when we were working for one of those dot-com startups that were all the rage at the time. Everybody strolled into the office around 10:30, left at 5 and brought their dogs to the office. And no one did any real work; we all just sat in "brainstorming" meetings, discussing...
Torre's Torture Of Grady Continues
It's starting to inch ever so closer to official that Joe Torre will be the new manager of the Los Angeles Dodgers, particularly after Grady Little resigned from the job yesterday, claiming those famous "personal reasons." Thus continues Torre's perpetual torment of poor Grady....
The Only Time Jon Kitna Has Ever Been Naked In Public
We're a little behind on this, but it's awfully amusing, particularly because it's Halloween. Lions quarterback Jon Kitna apparently has a better sense of humor than you might have thought....
Please Give A Warm Forum Welcome To Day One Of The NBA Season
Welcome the return of your daily recap of NBA "action."...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you read Scott Boras' neatly-typed apology letter, which may or may not be sincere ... • NBA: Portland at San Antonio; Houston at Los Angeles Lakers. Charles Barkley is back! Did you miss him? [TNT] • NHL: Pittsburgh at Minnesota. Try to control your Penguin Lust. [Versus] • Boxing:...
Oh, No, You Didn't Forget About Jeff, Did You?
If it's almost November, that can only mean one thing: Time for Jeff George's annual desperate plea to come back to the NFL!...
The Patriots Are Just Tempting Fate
As the above video shows, with all the hatred directed at the Patriots right now — the batshit nuts Easterbrook type, and other more planetary notions — we're legitimately surprised no one has gone after Tom Brady's knees yet. (KSK might have been the first with this idea.) We would never advocate s...
A Look At Kevin Garnett
We're dangerously close to the start of the NBA season, with all its drama and months of madness. To us, part of the beauty of the NBA is that its focus, while ultimately on the team, falls on the individual. The plight of one player becomes an epic tale in the shadow of Jordan; who is the real alph...
Everybody To The Goal Line! Stat!
Whatever your thoughts about Georgia's whole-team-celebration last Saturday after scoring the first touchdown against Florida, you can't deny it wasn't fascinating to look at....
You Know, Torre Really Could Use A Tan
Our old friend Peter Abraham, who is a big fan of sushi and Fashion Week gossip, has the big scoop this morning: The Dodgers are going to fire Grady Little and hire Joe Torre....
Seriously, They Still Use The Term "Gunslinger"
Leave it to Monday Night Football to take a vintage Brett Favre moment, his overtime game-winning touchdown over the Broncos last night, and turn it into yet another exercise in overpromotion....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as ... hey, where did Julie go? She just vanished! ... • NFL: Green Bay at Denver. Favre plus thin oxygen equals wacky fun for the entire family. [ESPN] • NHL: San Jose at Dallas. Sharks are in town, which means it's free skate! [Versus] • Local programming: Please enjoy endless hours ...
Dice-K Spreads The Joy
Because it's tradition around these parts, here's your obligatory Vaguely Homoerotic And Uncomfortable Clubhouse Celebration Picture. It's Daisuke Matsuzaka, spreading his champagne love over an unnamed recipient. We're hoping it's Schilling....