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Eagles’ Third-String QB Throws Touchdown Pass, Negotiates With Kid To Get Football Back<em></em><em></em>
Nate Sudfeld entered the Eagles’ playoff-clinching 24-0 win over Washington yesterday after Nick Foles got hurt and threw just one pass. It was a 22-yard TD toss to Nelson Agholor, the first touchdown throw of Sudfeld’s career. ...

The College Football Coaching Carousel Is Busted
Miami Hurricanes defensive coordinator Manny Diaz had accepted the head coaching position for Temple on Dec. 13. Although the Canes still had their bowl game later in the month, Diaz was locked in for the early signing period, so as to keep his new school’s recruits and convince them that it was wor...

Dan Snyder Doesn't Get It
Was this it, finally? Was this the utter embarrassment needed for Dan Snyder, who has owned an NFL team for 20 years and watched it descend over that time from the ranks of the league’s proud/storied/whatever franchises into a permanent laughingstock—over which time the one constant has been Snyder ...

Tom Coughlin Rips Leonard Fournette And T.J. Yeldon For Sitting On The Bench All Day
The Jaguars’ miserable and noxious season came to an end today, but not without one final reminder of how dysfunctional the team is from top to bottom. ...

Here Are Some Photos Of Tom Brady Taken Today
Maddie Meyer from Getty Images photographed today’s Jets-Patriots game. She got some excellent photos of Tom Brady, like the one above. ...

It's Mutton Bustin' Chaos In Houston
The Texans and Jaguars don’t kick off until 1 p.m. EST today, but the hair-raising action is well underway in Houston. Mutton bustin’, America’s true past time where kids willfully and repeatedly eat shit while trying to cling to the backs of rampaging sheep, took over Houston’s stadium this morning...

John Wall's Busted Heel Has Officially Put The Wizards Out Of Their Misery
The Wizards, who are currently 14-24, have reached the point in their season when it’s more beneficial for them to start being bad on purpose rather than being bad on accident. The only thing standing in the way of this transition is that the Wizards do not fit the standard profile of a tanking tea...

Clemson Reminded Us That Notre Dame Is A Fraud
Who didn’t see this coming? For what’s felt like the entire college football season, Notre Dame had the air of championship pretenders, despite running the table through their hand-picked schedule. In Saturday’s first College Football Playoff semi-final, Clemson put any doubt about that assumption t...

The Cotton Bowl Pregame Eagle Went Rogue All Over JerryWorld
Prior to the Cotton Bowl college football semifinal between prepared No. 3 Notre Dame and No. 2 Clemson, one intrepid bird of prey decided to take a flying tour throughout the 100,000-seat monument to Jerry Jones’ overcompensation:...

Tommy Pham Says The Rays Have "Really No Fan Base At All"
Talks with area officials on a potential new stadium fell apart earlier this month, so the Rays are back in their generation-long limbo. Perhaps matters in Oakland are more pressing for MLB, but eventually, something’s going to have to give here—and as Rays outfielder Tommy Pham so brutally but accu...

Referee Meltdown In Celtics-Rockets Surprisingly Has Nothing To Do With James Harden's Footwork
The Rockets ran away from the Celtics Thursday night, in a game that was marred in both halves by some especially spotty and sensitive refereeing by the officiating crew. The officials handed out six technical fouls—three against each team—and at least a couple of them appeared to be the result of r...

Dexter Lawrence Probably Should Have Skipped The Cotton Bowl
In the span of a week, Clemson defensive tackle Dexter Lawrence had a drug test come back positive for an anabolic steroid not approved for human use or consumption in the U.S., or in any other country, vehemently denied in front of reporters that he knowingly put anything illegal into his body, and...

Duke's Daniel Jones Gets Compared To Peyton Manning, Officially Enters The Pre-Draft Hype Cycle
Duke quarterback Daniel Jones lit up the Temple Owls in the Independence Bowl today, throwing for 423 yards and five touchdowns while leading the Blue Devils to a 56-27 victory. Jones, who is exactly the kind of quarterback—a very tall white one—who tends to get football analysts and commentators in...

The Sad, Short Story Of The First Responder Bowl
We all had this day circled on our calendars, because this is the day that Boston College and Boise State were set to meet in the big game—the one we’ve all been waiting for, the one that kept us awake last night: the First Responder Bowl. I regret to inform you that the First Responder Bowl has bee...

<i>A Christmas Story</i> Subplots, Ranked
Christmas feels incomplete without at least four-to-six partial viewings of A Christmas Story, Bob Clark’s 1983 movie based on Jean Shepherd’s semi-autobiographical stories. By now, if you have a heart, you’ve seen each segment and running subplot dozens of times. But which are the best? And which a...

What Did We Get Stuck In Our Rectums Last Year?<em></em>
It’s here! It’s finally here! Every year it seems like the big day will never come, but it’s here. It’s the day to gather with your family and friends ‘round the hearth, warm beverages and sweet treats at the ready, and have a hearty chortle over the things America stuck inside itself and couldn’t r...

Skins Cut D.J. Swearinger After He's Honest About The Team's Crummy Defensive Coordinator
As the Eagles snuck by the Texans on a last-second field goal, what was spiritually official a month ago became actually official: The Skins can’t make the playoffs. Surely the team will fit a lot of infighting into the season’s final week. It’s already started by the release of a Pro Bowl player on...

The Texans Lost, But At Least We Got To See This Amazing Deshaun Watson Escape Play
Down six with just over four minutes left in regulation, the Texans were marching down the field with the intention of scoring a touchdown and taking the lead. On the fifth play of the drive, Deshaun Watson faced a third-and-11 on Houston’s 44-yard line and needed to convert to keep things going. Hi...

Demaryius Thomas Carted Off With Torn Achilles
Texans WR Demaryius Thomas’s season is over. In the fourth quarter of the Texans game against the Eagles, Thomas crumpled to the ground in agony after planting his left foot, and he had to be taken off the field on a cart. Because it was a non-contact injury, he seemed to know how bad it was immedia...

Jordan Pickford's Manuel Neuer Impression Ended In Disaster
Tottenham pantsed Everton something serious this afternoon, scoring six goals on the hapless Toffees. Their attack was ruthless and Everton never seemed to get up to speed. Son Heung-Min banged in the opener with a well-placed shot, though really, the story of that goal is Everton keeper Jordan Pic...