ty Page 522 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
<em>The Maya Rudolph Show</em> Is Half-Man, Half-Muppet, And All Woman
"Men invented nepotism and practically live by it. It's okay for women to do it, too." All week long, I've been thinking about that quote from Roxane Gay's forthcoming essay collection, Bad Feminist—a prayer-hands-emoji-inducing aphorism that echoed again during last night's premiere of The Maya Rud...
When Is a "Party 69" Jersey Appropriate?
The answer to that question is almost certainly "never," but let's keep open the possibility that this jersey is somehow acceptable in at least one situation. Siths and absolutes, and all that. Still, we can safely say that the hypothetically palatable "Party 69" jersey-wearing situation is not a ga...
Tony La Russa Warns Grads About The Machines During Commencement Speech
Tony La Russa gave the commencement speech at Washington University last week. It was, like most commencement speeches, sort of rambly and boring. But there was one La Russian moment that caught our attention, in which the old manager started going on about Styx, the machines, and sabermetrics....
Robert Mathis Picks A PED Fight With The NFL He's Not Going To Win
Robert Mathis's agent is not about to let his client's four-game suspension pass without a fight—and the NFL appears willing to engage him. The agent, Hadley Englehard, and the NFL have waged an unusually public war of words for Mathis's violation of the league's drug policy for what he claims was a...
Sir Dickharem, Asshair Moan, And More Anagrammed NHL Names
Do you like anagrams? Are you also immature? You will likely enjoy these anagrammed NHL names....
Did An Iowa Basketball Player Punch A Guy In The Face Over A Tweet?
Iowa Hawkeyes basketball player Zach McCabe was arrested and charged Friday after allegedly punching a man in the face, knocking him to the ground, and blowing a kiss as he left. One report suggests that it may have been caused by an insulting tweet sent by the victim to McCabe....
David Price Loses Cow-Milking Contest
Friday night was apparently Dairy Night in Anaheim, so the stadium held a cow-milking contest before the Rays-Angels game. The two competitors: David Price and Luis Jimenez. Who would be the best milker?...
Jets Defensive Coordinator Accused Of Slapping Woman At Bar
Jets defensive coordinator Dennis Thurman has been accused of slapping a woman at a bar Wednesday. The victim filed a police report, though Thurman hasn't been arrested or charged....
Atlético Madrid's Diego Simeone Is The World's Dopest Manager
Atlético Madrid and Barcelona are set to play the biggest league game in the history of the world today. Most of the cast in this production are well known—Barça are still Barça, though by all accounts their manager is not long for this city; we've touched on Atléti's players before—but the total ba...
France's Manager Sues Samir Nasri's Girlfriend For "Public Insult"
After Samir Nasri's girlfriend took to Twitter earlier this week to slam the French national team for leaving her man off the World Cup team, said France manager Didier Deschamps has brought a lawsuit against her for public insult. This is so French....
The Lawyer Who Blocked Kevin Durant
Last week, Brice Plebani stopped by the Seat Pleasant Activity Center in Prince George's County, Md., to drop off a graduation invitation. ...
Rice Lands QB By Sending Recruiting Letter To His Cat
Quarterback J.T. Granato committed to Rice yesterday, his decision perhaps helped by a letter from the Owls' offensive coordinator to his cat, Kitty:...
Jack Nicholson Left A Little Kid Hanging At The Clippers Game
Jack Nicholson, betraying his lifelong Lakers fandom, was sitting courtside at last night's playoff game between the Thunder and Clippers. He didn't do much but sit around and look surly, but he did find time to inadvertantly embarrass one young fan before the game got started:...
Browns Coach: Johnny Manziel Texted Me, Asking To Be Drafted
Browns QB coach Dowell Loggains appeared on ESPN Radio Arkansas yesterday, and revealed that Johnny Manziel was the top quarterback on Cleveland's draft board, and that the Browns had tried to make trades with Tennessee at No. 11 and Dallas at No. 16 to move up and grab him. But Loggains also shed s...
College Soccer Coach Charged With Murder Of 12-Year-Old Boy
Oral "Nick" Hillary, the men's soccer coach at Clarkson University in Upstate New York, was arrested yesterday and charged with the 2011 murder of a 12-year-old boy....
Sepp Blatter: Giving Qatar The World Cup "Was A Mistake"
FIFA president Sepp Blatter offered up his strongest words yet regarding the scandal- and problem-plagued Qatar bid for the 2022 World Cup, admitting what nearly everyone else already has: "Of course," Blatter told a Swiss TV station, "it was a mistake."...
TV Chef Fucks Up Grilled-Cheese Sandwich
Listen. Alton Brown is a goddamn hero. He's funny and smart and silly and endlessly curious, and he knows five trillion times as much about food as I ever will. He's turned bazillions of people onto cooking, and onto trying ingredients and techniques they otherwise wouldn't, and his commendable w...
Elderly Samuel Eto'o Bashes Mourinho, Plans To Play As <em>Actual</em> Old Man
Samuel Eto'o is in the Ivory Coast today in support of the Copa Coca Cola, an international youth tournament. In an interview before the event, he had some choice words for the "fool" José Mourinho and anyone else who wants to fuck with Hollywood Court....
The Competitive-Balance Argument Against Paying Athletes Is Bullshit
High on the list of myths thrown out as excuses to delay or prevent the advent of pay-for-play is that the price-fixing engaged in by the 351 schools in Division 1, and especially the now 128 schools in FBS who play football, is necessary to ensure competitive balance across the sport. ...
The Technicality That Will Allow The NBA To Get Rid Of Both Sterlings
With all of Adam Silver's stern talk in his press conference announcing Donald Sterling's lifetime ban, it appeared the process of removing Sterling's ownership interest would be swift. However, not much in the way of action has happened since then. This SI report mentions an interesting technicalit...