ty Page 642 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Go Home, Everybody: We Found The Most Ridiculous Fan In The World
He was at the Dolphins game. They lost by 34. To the Titans. Unforgotten isn't a word. Is that a bowling tattoo on the right side of his torso?...


Buffalo Bills Fan Sues Team For Excessive Text Message Program He Signed Up For
There are many wonderful things about living in the United States. It's far from perfect, but as far as countries go, it's a pretty sweet place to live. Then you read about a guy like Jerry Wojcik and it makes you want to scrap the whole thing and start over. Jerry Wojcik is suing the Buffalo Bills ...

Who The Hell Is Johnny Manziel, And Why Wasn't He Wearing A Shirt In His Mug Shot? A Guide
Yesterday, everyone but rival SEC partisans fell in love with the Texas A&M quarterback, a goofy-eared, smiley kid that beat the nigh-unbeatable Alabama football deathstar with an excitability and intuition that finally made good on the old "He's just like a kid out there!" announcer trope. That you...

At Long Last, John Olerud Claims Victory Over The Tree In His Neighbor's Yard
September brought grave news that, until just now, had occupied most of our attention, kept us awake at night, asleep during the day, and our entire lives turned upside down. John Olerud, proud owner of a beautiful piece of land with pristine views just outside Seattle, had a problem. From our origi...

Texas A&M And Johnny Manziel Working Together To Trademark "Johnny Football"
Darren Rovell—who else?—has the news that on the heels of Texas A&M's upset of Alabama, the school is working in conjunction with the Manziel family to trademark the totally distinctive "Johnny Football" nickname the upstart quarterback has recently earned....

Source: Peter "Dr. Pete" Gray, Disgraced University Of Iowa Athletics Adviser, Hung Out At Local Gay Bars, Was Hired On The Condition That He Not Get Mired In A Public Sex Scandal
Yesterday, we brought you the story of Peter Gray, an athletics adviser at the University of Iowa recently investigated by his employer. The university found evidence of long-term sexual harassment of students and cases of Gray bartering for sex with tickets to Iowa sporting events. The complaint ag...

It Sucks To Be Brandon Weeden, Vol. 5: The Browns Are Already Publicly Wondering Whether Brandon Weeden Is Any Good
First, he was trapped under a flag before ever playing a down in the NFL. Then, he was listed as 129 years of age on the Browns game program, which only served to draw attention to how old Brandon Weeden really is—29, way old for a rookie. Then, Rivals.com couldn't compile his high school stats beca...

In Yet Another Case Of Metrics Confusion, Hakeem Nicks Claims Stats Are Useful For Impressing Girls
Hakeem Nicks's production has fallen in recent games, partly due to a left knee injury. A reporter asked him whether he was concerned about the drop-off, and he answered in a way that briefly sent the sports analytics world into a fit of eye-rolling and furiously composing Nate-Silver-meme jokes: "S...


Your College Football Open Thread
Three weeks of regular season college football left! The process by which teams go from "disappointing start" to "wait-a-minute-are-we-even-going-to-make-a-bowl-game" was set in motion months ago, but this is when everyone notices, so there should be some excellent temper tantrums across university ...

Your Week 11 College Football Master Schedule
Schedule and broadcasters via and cross-referenced with. If you spot any errors, let us know below. Conferences reflect home teams. Ranked teams bold; rankings from the USA Today Coaches Poll. Times (EST)....

Report: University Of Iowa Athletics Adviser Traded Tickets For Sex, Had Harassed Students Since The 1990s
An internal investigation of Peter Gray, senior academics adviser for the University of Iowa Athletics Department and staff member for about 13 years total, has turned up a laundry list of inappropriate behavior, all sexual in nature, mostly involving students in some form or another. Gray allegedly...

The Carrier Classic Is Back, And It's Still Gorgeous
It's the second year for the Carrier Classic, the season tip-off played on the deck of an aircraft carrier. Tonight, the Notre Dame and Ohio State women play first on the USS Yorktown in Charleston Harbor, with the Marquette and OSU men to follow. One day, if they keep doing this, it's going to get ...

Last Night Reminded The World That Blaine Gabbert Is Hopeless And Chad Henne Isn't
We wondered in September why the Jaguars had refused to bench Blaine Gabbert (pictured above, on his ass)—their woeful second-year quarterback—in favor of Chad Henne, their slightly below-average (serviceable!) young veteran backup. Since then, Gabbert's play has, uh, I guess we could say picked up:...

How NFL Players Found Their Voice On The Marriage-Equality Issue
When Minnesota Vikings punter Chris Kluwe wrote his famous "lustful cockmonster" letter to a Maryland state delegate back in September, he wasn't just defending gay marriage: Kluwe was also sticking up for Brendon Ayanbadejo....

"Anal Charles," "Python Manning": What Happens When An SI.com Article Gets Mangled By Spellcheck
Reader Colin alerted us to this SI.com fantasy football advice column, published yesterday afternoon, and offered a theory. It was composed totally on an iPhone, and autocorrect had its way with the player names. That's not a terrible guess....

Rob Gronkowski To Astronaut In Space: "Are You Floating Right Now?"
NASA astronaut Sunita Williams Skyped with Patriots punter Zoltan Mesko and 6-foot-6 second-grader Rob Gronkowski earlier today. Guess who asked Williams, "Are you floating right now?" and "Aren't your suits way heavier than ours?" just before he makes the same pensive face as a middle-schooler try...

Mark McGwire Has No Idea "Why Anybody Would Even Think About" Using PEDs Today
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Mac says MLB's got the problem under control....

Your KHL Update: Importing the Enforcer
While the NHL and the NHLPA may or may not be making significant progress toward saving the season, hockey rages on abroad. Hopefully I'll have reason to stop doing these posts soon, but in the meantime, here's your second weekly KHL fix....