ty Page 828 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights


If Only Mike Cooper Called New York City Home...
It's a sad commentary on the state of the summer sports scene that one of the most important things happening today (other than the Arena Football playoffs, of course) is this Mustache Madness tournament going on at Keyboard Quarterbacks....

Seriously, Would It Kill You To Sexually Arouse Dick Bavetta?
Isiah Thomas, after stealing Zach Randolph and being complimented by Spike Lee on draft night, enjoyed one day of good publicity. Today, Anucha Browne Sanders, who is suing Isiah for sexual harassment, would like to remind us that Isiah is, in many ways, still a dick....

Come Join Us At The Philly Pants Party
After a bit of a delay, we have the details for the next Deadspin Pants Party, to be held in Philadelphia on Saturday, July 14. It's all official and stuff: You can buy your tickets right here. Game starts at 3:55. We will be there, as will the esteemed balls of A.J. Daulerio....


The Stephen A. Smith Hecklers Return!
We had been told The Stephen A. Smith Heckling Society Of Gentlemen would not be at the NBA Draft this year. We were wrong; oh, how we were....

"Hey, Guys! It's Oliver!"
Maybe we just couldn't muster up the incredible enthusiasm of these "baseball" "players."...

East Side Little League Will Cap Your Ass
First of all, this is not a hockey post. This Wade Campbell is a Little League dad, who, concerned that his son wasn't getting enough playing time, had a cheerful discussion with his coach. Yes, the term "shot down like a dog" was used, but only in the most constructive of ways....


Enjoy The Comedic Stylings Of Lenny DiNardo
Tonight, the summer of Pants Parties continues: We'll be hitting ole Shea Stadium for the A's-Mets showdown. DiNardo! Glavine! Eight dollar beers! Welcome to New York....

Mike And Mike Are Everywhere You Look
All told, we think we gave Mike and Mike too hard of a time on the whole spelling bee thing. They weren't so bad; maybe they toned down the schtick for ABC. Anyway, as part of ESPN's plan to have Mike Greenberg (the gay one) and Mike Golic (the fat one) broadcasting every event that Berman and Tiric...

When Your ERA Is 0.04, Nobody Cares Whom You Took To Prom
One of the women in this photo — we're not sure which one, and we're not gonna go try and find out, lest their father hunt us down and call us out in the pages of a national newspaper — is Katie Osburn, a pitcher for Allen Park Cabrini high school in Michigan. Well, we say "a" pitcher, but we really...

And Suddenly, Figure Skating Is Fun Again
Just in case you haven't heard, Kristy Swanson was arrested Saturday night in Kingston, Ont. after a fight with Marcia O'Brien, who is the ex-wife of Canadian figure skater Lloyd Eisler. Swanson is dating Eisler. People magazine has the details, of course, and says that O'Brien filed a complaint, le...

MLB Reminds You That It Owns The Rights To Richie Sexson's Batting Average
Now that Bud Selig has this steroids problem completely under control, he's turning his lawyers loose on the real enemy: Unlicensed fantasy baseball leagues. We eagerly await the first major enforcement incident. We see police shouting instructions into a house through a bullhorn, followed by a paun...

Stableford: Whom Would Philippoussis Rather?
FishbowlNY editor Dylan Stableford occasionally writes for Deadspin about tennis. Here's his take on the new reality show about Mark Philippoussis deciding between young women and old women. (Or something like that.)...

How Mark McGwire Will Get You On Jury Duty
Part of our job is to bring you the best links we can from around the Web, highlighting all the talented people doing amazing things simply because they love it. But the site we think might be the best, and the one we read more religiously than any other, is Viva El Birdos. We don't link it that oft...

John Daly Wants To Make It Clear His Wife Beats Him
Someone asked us the other day: "Why do people care so much about John Daly? He never even wins tournaments. He's not that good." The answer to our question was simple: John Daly is the world's only interesting golfer....

Is Gilbert Really Gonna Leave?
With everyone up in arms about the possibility of Gilbert Arenas leaving the Wizards, we thought we'd look at whether or not he would actually leave. After all, Gilbert is that rare superstar athlete who seems human and likable, and the average fan doesn't like to see a guy like that just — all toge...

Chad Johnson: The New Barbaro?
How far has horse racing sunk? Far enough that sport's biggest event of the day isn't at Belmont, but at River Downs in Cincinnati....

Sebastien Gacond Is Gay (As Long As You Make It Clear It's The "Happy" Kind Of Gay)
This is Sebastien Gacond. He is a professional triathlete, which is impressive; it must be difficult to be an athlete with three major appendages. He is also not gay. Not gay at all. Nothing gay about Sebastien Gacond. He is all man. It is extremely important that you understand this....