ugh Page 39 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
New Ohio State Coach Ryan Day Has Already Poached A Pair Of Michigan Coaches
Today marks the end of Ryan Day’s first week as Ohio State’s head coach, a position he inherited after Urban Meyer slunk off following the Buckeyes’ Rose Bowl win. Day will face a tough task as he takes over for a man who had single-digit losses in his seven seasons. (Hopefully he does not imitate M...
What Horrible Things Did We Do To Our Penises Last Year?<em></em>
Happy new year, one and all. This year, resolve to take better care of your dick and balls; last year you did a really bad job of it....
Tom Coughlin Rips Leonard Fournette And T.J. Yeldon For Sitting On The Bench All Day
The Jaguars’ miserable and noxious season came to an end today, but not without one final reminder of how dysfunctional the team is from top to bottom. ...
What Did We Get Stuck In Our Rectums Last Year?<em></em>
It’s here! It’s finally here! Every year it seems like the big day will never come, but it’s here. It’s the day to gather with your family and friends ‘round the hearth, warm beverages and sweet treats at the ready, and have a hearty chortle over the things America stuck inside itself and couldn’t r...
Jets Deny That They'll Try To Woo Milk Fiend Jim Harbaugh
Though this isn’t as strange a rumor as Condoleezza Rice to the Browns, ProFootballTalk’s Mike Florio says a league source told him that after the season concludes, the New York Jets want to throw a buttload of money at Michigan head coach Jim Harbaugh and see if he’s interested. Huh!...
Bills Defenders Force Timeout After Helmet And Jersey Won't Stop Smooching<em></em>
Bills rookie linebacker Tremaine Edmunds assisted in a stop at the line of scrimmage to force a fourth down and punt from the Lions in the first half today. His teammate Jerry Hughes also tried to help, but instead had his helmet stuck to the back of Edmunds’s jersey. Aw, they like each other....
The Ravens Are Lamar Jackson's Team Now
Rookie quarterback Lamar Jackson has started the last four games for the Baltimore Ravens while starter Joe Flacco has been injured, and in that span of time he’s helped resuscitate Baltimore’s playoff hopes. Jackson’s gone 3-1 as a starter, and the Ravens are now creeping up on the Steelers for the...
![Hugh Freeze: "[Jesus Christ] Is The Only One I've Ever Met Who Can Handle My Junk"](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/lny4hukysmwvat1ycbz0.jpg)
Hugh Freeze: "[Jesus Christ] Is The Only One I've Ever Met Who Can Handle My Junk"
Disgraced former Baylor AD Ian McCaw and fearmongering reactionary legacy kid Jerry Falwell Jr. introduced Hugh Freeze as Liberty University’s new head football coach on Friday. Everyone had a great time. Here were the best parts:...
Report: Liberty Hires Hugh Freeze, Because Of Course They Would
Hugh Freeze, the former Ole Miss coach who resigned a month before the 2017 college football season over some alleged improper horniness, has finally found a new job after one-and-a-half years on the shelf. As Football Scoop first reported and ESPN later confirmed, Freeze will take over the head coa...
NFL Puts Referee Who Allegedly Called Bills DE Jerry Hughes A "Bitch" On Administrative Leave
In keeping with the recent trend of only reviewing problems that that have been caught on video, the league has decided to place referee Roy Ellison on administrative leave while reviewing an incident between the official and Bills defensive end Jerry Hughes, according to Ian Rapoport....
David Moyes Is The Most Interested Man In The World
Southampton fired Mark Hughes today after finally realizing what was evident to just about everyone the day he got the manager position there, which is that things were almost certainly not going to work out. And like your unemployed cousin who desperately needs a job so he can finally move out of y...
Bills DE Jerry Hughes Screams At Ref For Calling Him A "Bitch" Then Claims Not To Remember Incident
Buffalo Bills defensive end Jerry Hughes confronted a referee in the tunnel after the Bills’ very stupid loss to the Miami Dolphins, accusing the referee of calling him a “bitch.” Hughes yelled, “I’ll catch you,” before Bills personnel stood between him and the referees. ...
Here Is a Truly Putrid Basketball Sequence
The Bucks lost to the Hornets yesterday, thanks largely to the following sequence in which they missed what feels like 15 shots in what feels like five seconds. There’s no one standout here, as every single Milwaukee player’s ability to trip over himself is remarkable and laudable; a special note of...
Brett Kavanaugh's Still Coaching Basketball
Brett Kavanaugh’s still got coaching on his calendar after all. ...
James McClean's Refusal To Wear The Poppy Has Made Him The Most Hated Man In English Soccer
In England, Halloween ends and gives way to November in various ways: Pumpkins left on doorsteps begin their neglected descent into rot; the seasonal coffee flavoring changes to gingerbread; James McClean begins receiving death threats from a certain brand of soccer fan, including among his own supp...
Gosh, I Really Hope The Red Wings Can Manage To Win A Game This Year
They tried really hard. That’s really the best thing you can say about the Red Wings’ relatively close but still inevitable 3-1 loss to the Lightning on Thursday night. The Wings hung with the Bolts throughout the whole game, but eventually found themselves outdone by just a top-notch performance fr...
<i>Emergency Football Show Weekly</i>: The Roughing The Passer Rule Continues To Vex Defenders
It’s the second episode of Emergency Football Show Weekly, and what are we talking about this week? Lots! We discuss Antonio Brown’s game-winning catch against the Bengals, the continued roughing the passer rule controversy and, of course, Dick Stockton calling the Denver Broncos “the Denver Nuggets...
T.J. Watt Got Fined $20,000 For Breathing Near Matt Ryan's Leg
The start of this NFL season has been marked, over and over again, the softest possible roughing the passer penalties. Defenders are not allowed to land on top of quarterbacks, which means that they must somehow levitate or something after completing a sack. The rule was tweaked to emphasize protect...
Hugh Freeze Gets New Job In Football League That Doesn't Exist Yet
Former Ole Miss head coach Hugh Freeze, who lost his job after details of his escort-calling came to light, has been looking to get back into coaching football for over a year. He recently blamed the “climate in America” on his persisting joblessness, but he can now put those complaints to bed. Hugh...
Fire The Suns Into The Sun
The Suns fired GM Ryan McDonough on Monday. Firing McDonough makes sense, as he has proven himself to be very bad at building a coherent NBA roster, let alone one capable of winning more games than it loses. Firing him nine days before the start of the regular season is just more flailing absurdity ...