up Page 871 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Full Report On The Sex Boat
So, hey, anybody else actually dug into these whole Vikings criminal complaints, the ones The Smoking Gun grabbed? If you haven't yet, we suggest you do, because it's even more entertaining than you thought. But, we understand, you're very busy at work today. So allow us to help you out. We've dug...
Sex Boat Case Sails Off
It's a sad day when you can't take your rookie teammates out for a little Lake Minnetonka party with a bunch of whores. This goddamned Internet is invading everybody's privacy....
PETA's Super Bowl Shuffle
According to the New York Post, the fine folks at PETA are putting together an commercial for the Super Bowl that will involved female models "'flashing' the camera, and when they lift their shirt, they will have prosthetic udders over their breasts." Ignoring the fact that this is almost, letter ...
NFL Roundup: "I Disagree With Your Decision And Shall Protest Thusly"
• It's funny, because if you remember when Guenther Cunningham actually coached the Chiefs, you'd understand that here, he's just giving his unique signal to go for two. • It's like the Chargers suddenly remembered that Marty Schottenheimer's their coach. • Anybody see the new ESPN magazine? (Anyb...
Americans Excited About Handsless Event
OK, the seeds for next year's World Cup are out, and since we're one of the presumed four countries in the draw with Internet access, we're on top of the story....
NFL Roundup: Bengal Breakthrough
• As Arizona Cardinals fans, we always wonder what the day will be like when, after years of torture, our team finally breaks through and shows they're serious about this whole winning business. It must have been that exciting for Bengals fans yesterday. Realize: A baby born the last time the Beng...
Hot Canadian Football Action
Last weekend's CFL Grey Cup might have been an amazing game ... but you should have seen what was going on in the stands! A Vancouver reader who was there writes us:...
NFL Roundup: Fore!
• Honestly, what more can you say about Bengals wide receiver Chad Johnson? This will almost certainly be a poll later this week, but his "putt the football with the pilon followed by a Tiger Woods fist pump" was, once again, completely inspired. (All it was missing was an awkward high five.) If t...
NFL Roundup: Lovie's Kind Of Town
• So here's something crazy: With a break or two, the Chicago Bears could have playoff home-field advantage in the NFC. Still, whether they win the Super Bowl or not, "Ditka" is always going to sound cooler than "Lovie." • We're really starting to maybe think that Chesnning might really lead the C...
NFL Roundup: Down Goes Tice!
• What's funnier than Mike Tice being rolled over and knocked down on the sideline? Nothing, that's what. By the way, we find Tice's dopey sideline celebrations undignified, and Tom Coughlin's constant gyrations of fury incredibly amusing. • Samkon Gado, baby, Samkano Gado. Two touchdowns, one gr...
Jim Edmonds, Gold LOVER
We've been so caught up with lesbian cheerleaders and fake press conferences — both of which, just to wrap all this up, we'll be checking back with later today — that we forgot to check in with the great On The DL girls this week. We're sorry, ladies! We still have nothing but love....
Don't Forget About The Sex Cruise!
While the rest of us sully our filthy little minds with stories of lesbian cheerleaders, The Mighty MJD is keeping his eyes on the prize of the whole Vikings sex boat story. (How quickly we forget ...)...
NFL Roundup: Kicking T.O.
• We love pictures like this. Everyone, honestly, should have a kicker of their own to hug and cuddle. • We're not going to get too into this — because, of course, we're going to do our own whole post on the matter later today — but ESPN's coverage of Terrell Owens is bordering on stalking. ESPN's...
Your Vikings Orgy Memento
The bid is only up to $5.95, and, quite frankly, we find that number unacceptable. Currently on eBay: a commemorative Vikings sex cruise T-shirt, or, as the sellers call it, the "Coochie Cruise '05."...
NFL Roundup: A Costly Fumble
• It's pretty astounding that fan guy in Cincinnati was able to run on the field during the Packers' closing drive. First off, they were at midfield, which means he had to run at least 50 yards, probably more, without someone beating him to Brett Favre. (Note: The next time you're in Cincinnati, b...
Lou Piniella's Sad, Sunken Look
The following exchange just took place on "Cold Pizza:"...
A View From Inside The Vikings Sex Boat
From the great NFL Wives Club Yahoo Group comes this missive from a woman who was actually on the Vikings sex boat:...
More Fun With Webshots And Groupies
The On The DL girls have posted some more Webshots photos of baseball players and their "friends", and though the celebrity quotient is decreased a bit — we get the pictured Alex Rios confused with about half the middle infielders in baseball, though we're curious what happened right after this pi...
Vikings In Desperate Need Of Dramamine
All kinds of developments from the Vikings orgy boat story over the weekend. The highlights:...
NFL Roundup: Some Pretty Skunk Weed
• Ricky Williams had six more yards yesterday than he's had droning "60 Minutes" profiles about him in the last year. So you know. Fortunately, that eight years is still about 50 less than the interviews Esquire writer Chris Jones has given about smoking pot with Williams. Maybe Ricky will catch u...