us Page 425 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Usain Bolt Attends Maskless Surprise Birthday Party, Unsurprisingly Gets COVID
Surprise! Usain Bolt has coronavirus....
Jacob Blake Is Why Roger Goodell's Words Are Meaningless
The master of spin is at it again. ...
This Year's Indy 500 Could Have Been Great
The Indianapolis 500 was Sunday, something that would have gone completely without notice if not for the fact that digital channel guides exist, such is the state of IndyCar in general these days, and such is the state of the world because the pandemic knocked the race out of its traditional spot on...
We Rank the Worst No. 1 Picks in NBA Lottery History
Since the NBA’s first draft lottery in 1985, there have been 11 first-overall picks who did not make an All-NBA team or appear in an All-Star Game. That number is a little inflated because Zion Williamson and DeAndre Ayton are just getting started, so when you’re trying to figure out which is the wo...
![Notre Dame and Brian Kelly Perfectly Happy to Put Kids in Harm's Way [UPDATED]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/a4ioridyqnhblcikrjfv.jpg)
Notre Dame and Brian Kelly Perfectly Happy to Put Kids in Harm's Way [UPDATED]
UPDATE: Notre Dame announced it will switch to online classes for the next two weeks....
We Can Usually Count on Ohio State to Produce Top-Tier Oblivious Athletes
If you ever need to find someone who doesn’t get it, you can generally consult Ohio State to come up with a candidate for you. That’s what we have currently with quarterback Justin Fields starting a petition, which currently has 200,000 signatures, to get the Big Ten to reverse its decision to not p...
Baseball Bozo Zach Plesac Lists All The Rules He Broke, Then Accuses The Media of 'Mistreatment'
“The last thing I would want to do is put anyone at risk,” Cleveland Indians pitcher Zach Plesac says, looking directly into the camera while driving down a city street....
NBA Ratings Nosedive Proves Sports Are Not Essential
Televised sports are entertainment — just like video games, Netflix, and pornography. The industry serves no other practical purpose in society. Farmers produce food. Builders produce homes. Professional athletics deliver fucking Mitsubishi commercials and $19 stadium beers and an irrational sense o...
Dallas Becomes the Nexus of All Our Problems
On the same day that Cowboys owner Jerry Jones said that the Cowboys will play in front of their fans when the NFL season kicks off, it must turn his incredibly stretched skin red and close to rupture to know that another team in Dallas was the first to play in front of fans last night....
What’s Better Than a Little WrestleMania Tank Sex?
One of the best moments in pro wrestling history just reached a whole other level of legendary status....
What Are the Odds That 23,000 People Attending a Horse Race Is a Bad Idea?
Churchill Downs announced today that 23,000 people will be able to attend September’s Kentucky Derby in accordance with the track’s health and safety plan....
Bubble Dumb: College Football Coaches Are The Last People Who Should Be In Charge
It’s long been a truth to college football coaches that any problem can be solved by making sure players study their playbooks more. Creating a “bubble,” as they see it in their mind, is actually utopia to pretty much every college football coach. An environment where all a player can do is stay in ...
AEW Has Run Out Of Excuses for Its Women’s Division
When AEW came onto the scene about a year ago, it promised a lot of things. It promised a lot of things that would be different than the other wrestling/TV company, WWE. It would feature a bigger variety of styles and performers, it would have an actual tag-team division, it wouldn’t be afraid to be...
In Shrugging Off COVID Heart Complications, NCAA Has Gravely Failed Its Athletes
The spring crawled into summer and the heat, combined with a global pandemic, has put all of our lives, including the lives of athletes, at a standstill. Many schools started having COVID-19 breakouts in the middle of the spring and the prognosis has only become more dire, with more and more schools...
Do You Mind If We Dance With Your Dates? - NHL First Round Preview: Eastern Conference
In a bit of true hockey hilarity, the actual NHL bubble-ized playoffs will begin without either of the “hosts” on Tuesday. Both the Toronto Maple Leafs and Edmonton Oilers scheduled a date for their respective faces with the pavement, and hence will have to watch these modified playoffs take place i...
Ben Sasse Writes Deranged Letter to Big Ten
There are a lot of things going on in this country right now. America is the laughingstock of the world after being unable to contain the COVID pandemic, largely because a non-insignificant portion of the population has decided to believe anti-vax Facebook posts over actual science. We’re in the mid...
Why Can’t the Astros Quietly Endure Their Shame?
The Houston Astros, instead of being content to take its shaming and move on, have decided to stick with their furious campaign to be the boil on the ass of baseball. Both they and the Oakland A’s are staring down the barrel of some pretty serious suspensions after a benches-clearing brawl yesterday...
LeBron Plants Seed of Failure by Once Again Throwing Teammates Under the Bus
For all we know, LeBron James could be right....
No One Is Cheering Against Sports, Idiots
With alarming spikes in COVID-19 erupting all across America, I had hoped that the “sportswriters are cheering against sports!” mouth-breathers on social media had slunk back from whence they came. Alas, yesterday sports talk radio host Danny Kannell, in the tradition of great minds like Clay Travis...