us Page 597 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Lauren Holiday Recovering From Brain Surgery, Gave Birth In September
Retired U.S. Women’s National Team midfielder Lauren Holiday underwent brain surgery Thursday to remove a benign tumor and is recovering in North Carolina. In September, Holiday gave birth to a daughter, who shares a name with her father, NBA player Jrue Holiday....
Carli Lloyd Scores Two Against Switzerland
Carli Lloyd had a spicy long-range strike in the first half of today’s friendly against Switzerland for the USWNT’s first goal of the match....
Dustin Hopkins Field Goal Attempt Bounces Off Top Of Upright
Detroit held onto its 3-0 second-quarter lead thanks to Washington kicker Dustin Hopkins achieving a dubious feat: missing a field goal due to the ball bouncing off the top of the upright. ...
UCF Beats UConn In Forced Rivalry Game, Leaves Dumb Trophy On Field
Central Florida defeated UConn, 24-16, Saturday in the fourth installment of the greatest artificial college football rivalry ever: The Civil Conflict. My mistake—it’s actually the Civil ConFLiCT....
CBS's Brian Jones Rants Against Targeting Rule
Brian Jones failed out of the NFL due to injury—he even filed, and lost, a lawsuit over it—but don’t tell him that the sport of football needs rules to protect players’ long-term health. The CBS college football analyst alternately demanded players grow eyes in the back of their head or barked “KEEP...
Dustin Brown Can Make A Lob Look Sexy
As far as outright winners go, lobs might be the least exhilarating way to terminate a point of tennis. You plop the tennis ball high into the air, way out of your opponent’s reach, and then it falls way back down into the court, hooray. You can respect the lob on a technical level—an especially def...
Team USA Was The Overwhelmed Newcomer At The Kabaddi World Cup<em></em>
The ancient Indian sport of kabaddi is undergoing a revolution. For centuries it was only played on dusty fields in backcountry villages, but the launch of the Pro Kabaddi League in 2014 has transformed it from an antiquated pastime into a modern sporting spectacle on the Asian subcontinent, played ...
Barcelona Are Reportedly Hot For Christian Pulisic
Look, I’m not going to tell you that this Spanish paper’s report that Barcelona, the (in my humble and in no way biased opinion) best club in world soccer, are “closely following” America’s Wonderteen Christian Pulisic, the (again, humble, unbiased opinion) greatest, can’t-miss soccer prospect in th...
The NFL's Private Spooks Made Molly Brown So Nervous She Told Deputies About It
Molly Brown reached out to the King County (Wash.) Sheriff’s Office after being contacted by the NFL’s private investigation firm, which wanted her to talk about the more than 20 times she said her now ex-husband, Giants kicker Josh Brown, abused her. At the time, Molly Brown already was talking to ...
Hindus And Trump Rallied Together In A Xenophobic Fever Dream
Grab a plate of good, oily pav bhaji and watch a well-loved Indian movie star perform for thousands of immigrants. He greets the crowd in Tamil, jokes about jet lag, shimmies, and shimmers in the hallucinogenic stage lighting; the crowd squeezes as close as security will allow. Then watch as presid...
Report: Russell Wilson Has Fucked, Plans To Fuck Again
Russell Wilson and Ciara got married three months ago. The happy couple recently said that they had done it (sex) to each other, and per a report from E!, they might very well be expecting a child. ...
Stephen Hauschka Has Been Letting People Spell His Name Wrong This Whole Time
For years, every football fan in America has been living in a world in which the Seattle Seahawks employ a kicker named Steven Hauschka. Today, we all discovered that Hauschka has been letting all of us live in a false reality....
Patrik Laine Is Also A Very Good Hockey Teen
Auston Matthews’s four-goal explosion in his very first game was the most impressive showing by a rookie so far this season, but he’s not the only precocious youngster scoring bundles of goals. Finnish winger Patrik Laine was picked by the Jets right behind Matthews, and the two hockey teens met ton...
ESPN’s Darren Rovell: I’m A Robot, I Pity The Humans<em></em>
This evening, at 10:21 p.m. EDT, Darren Rovell reached his terrifying final form....
The NFL And NFLPA Remind Us How Meaningless The League's Brain Damage Protocols Are
The NFL and NFLPA have released a joint statement explaining why Cam Newton wasn’t removed from the game to be evaluated for symptoms of brain damage after taking multiple blows to the head in Week 1. What the statement says, essentially, is that the things that millions of people saw happen to Newt...
Organize Or Die
Realistically, there is only one way out of our predicament. ...
Titans Owner Denies That Team Will Be Sold To Jon Bon Jovi "Or Anyone Else"
Jon Bon Jovi wants to buy an NFL team. He tried to buy the Bills earlier this year, and “continues to monitor the Titans’ ownership situation closely,” according to CBS’s Jason La Canfora....
Noah Droddy Has Been Called Majestic: That's Not The Half Of It
Nobody was taking Noah Droddy’s picture, which seemed strange considering the rail-thin runner’s recent rise to relative fame has been as much about his sensational (for the track world) ill brah appearance as his fast races, and the unlikely combo of the two. ...
Curt Schilling, For What Feels Like The Hundredth Time, Says He's Going To Run For Senate
Curt Schilling, the elite meme curator and former MLB pitcher made famous by refusing to recognize when he didn’t have a leg to stand on, said that he is considering a run for the United States Senate in 2018. This is not a new claim from him....
Nick Kyrgios Fined And Suspended For Tanking
Apparently unamused by Nick Kyrgios’s tanking antics in a second-round match at the Shanghai Masters, the ATP struck the No. 14 ranked player with a $25,000 fine for “Conduct Contrary to the Integrity of the Game” and an eight-week ban from the tour. ...