us Page 869 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

"Kill The Fucking Head": Gregg Williams Told The Saints To Destroy The 49ers' Brains
What you're listening to is Gregg Williams hyping up the Saints before their playoff game with San Francisco. It becomes clear that New Orleans's bounty program was less about monetary reward and all about a mindset of agression, and punishment, and maliciously hitting the shit out of opposing pl...

Document Reveals What Joe Paterno Would Have Said About Jerry Sandusky If Given The Chance
Don Van Natta Jr.'s lengthy account of the Penn State scandal for an upcoming issue of ESPN The Magazine does not contain a whole lot of new information for anyone who's been following the story closely. It is, however, an excellent overall summary of the case—particularly Pennsylvania governor Tom ...

Joey Votto's New Contract Is Like A Mortgage-Backed Security
Reds first baseman Joey Votto officially signed a big contract extension today. A big, honking deal: 10 years, $225 million, on top of the two years and $26 million the Reds already promised him for 2012 and 2013. There's an option year for 2024....

Nice Of Marlins Park To Include A Bobblehead Hall Of Nightmares
Lost in all the other wonderful features, like the fish and the home run sculpture and the fact that Marlins Park is actually really nice is something called the Bobblehead Museum. No need to come to Little Havana to see it—it'll come to you in your nightmares....

What The Astrodome Looks Like After Sitting Untouched And Rotting For A Decade
The Eighth Wonder of the World hasn't been used since the rodeo moved next door to Reliant Stadium in 2003. There are fanciful plans for the Astrodome, still preserved in time and set up for a football game of a team that doesn't exist—luxury hotel, movie studio, etc. But for now it's still just a s...

Martin Kaymer Holed Out His Attempt To Skip Across Augusta's Pond At The 16th Hole
It's a tradition during practice rounds at Augusta to attempt to skip a drive across the pond on the 16th hole, and German pro Martin Kaymer not only achieved that feat, but did it one better by actually holing the shot out. We've been on a mad search for good video of this since hearing about it ...

<em>Titanic</em>: The Original <em>Twilight</em>
On April 10, 1998, my sister came to visit me in Los Angeles. That was her 18th birthday, and while she was ostensibly heading to Los Angeles to visit her older brother, the real reason she made the trip was to assert her newfound independence: She was gonna get a tattoo....

Marlins Park, Camden Yards, And The End Of The Retro Ballpark
Marlins Park has been unveiled to the masses, and early reviews are fawning. "Contemporary," "dazzling," "forward-looking." The only thing not state-of-the-art is a true center field camera (perhaps the home run sculpture is in the way)....

30 Paragraphs About 30 MLB Teams From The Baseball Prospectus Crew
The following is excerpted from the team chapters and player profiles of the perpetually splendid Baseball Prospectus. You can buy the book now. Projected records via BP's playoff odds report. ...

That "White Michael Vick" Issue Of <em>ESPN The Magazine</em> Is Up For An Award
Remember this edition of ESPN The Periodical? It's been nominated for a National Magazine Award in the "single-topic issue" category. As you know, the issue touched on of the one of the great faultlines in our culture today: bad Photoshop. [ASME]...

Russian Soccer Fans Taunt Opponents With Blowjobby Tifo
Spartak Moscow supporters, with an ingenuity far surpassing their maturity, rigged up a penis banner to mouth-sodomize the mascot of rival Zenit Saint Petersburg. I think the fact that it's bestiality precludes any accusations of homophobia. [Off The Post]...

Ryan Leaf Is In Jail Again, Again
Stop me if you've heard this one before: Ryan Leaf is in jail. No, not because of the charges that landed him there Friday....

Russell Westbrook High-Fives Omer Asik As He Dunks Over Him
Keep your eye on Westbrook's left hand just after he takes flight. It's almost like he's thanking Asik for helping to make this dunk look so ferociously special....

Ryan Leaf Is In Jail Again
Iconic NFL bust Ryan Leaf—who just a few months ago was assuring us that this time he's clean, like, for real—is in jail after being busted for felony burglary, misdemeanor theft and criminal possession of dangerous drugs according to the Great Falls Tribune....

Pint-Sized NAIA Guard Devastates College Dunk Contest
The college basketball dunk contest is one of those things that airs on ESPN or one of its affiliates some unusual day at some unusual hour. (Apparently it was last night, circa 8 p.m., and naturally we're late to it.) But it probably shouldn't be, given what five-foot-nine James Justice of NAIA M...

Thomas Hill, Duke's Famous Weeper, Finally Confesses: I Wasn't Crying
"The misconception is that there are tears coming out of my eyes," Thomas Hill told me on Thursday. "There weren't." Hill is the former Duke guard who in 1992 became the happily crumpled face of the Blue Devils' last-second victory over Kentucky in the Elite Eight—maybe the face of March Madness its...

Joe Posnanski Is Leaving <em>Sports Illustrated</em> For Some Sort Of New <em>USA Today</em> Venture
Posnanski confirmed his departure after approximately three years at SI in a phone conversation with The Big Lead. He's joining some sort of joint venture between USA Today and MLB Advanced Media, which became a thing just last month....

This Is The 911 Call Of Joba Chamberlain's Trampoline Injury
The New York Daily News got this the other day, but it just came to our attention. As you can hear in the audio above, Joba Chamberlain's injury was reported as a "compound fracture" of the ankle. The bone had come all the way through the skin, and there was blood, though the caller can be heard to...

Jerry Sandusky's Trial Has Been Postponed Until June 5
It was supposed to begin May 14, but Judge John M. Cleland has pushed the start of the trial back because of scheduling conflicts. Cleland's decision had nothing to do with that 95-page motion to dismiss the charges filed last week by Sandusky's attorney, Lawyerin' Joe Amendola....

Wes Welker, Clay Matthews and DeMarcus Ware Play Great In Adult Diapers
Normally we don't like to post commercials. But there's something so determined about little Wes Welker. Oh, it's for (an undefined, nebulous) charity? Wes Welker will wear the shit out of your adult diapers. And Clay Matthews and DeMarcus Ware give in to peer pressure a little too easily. If that...