w Page 4748 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Behold The Pride Of The Ohio State University
Police busted a 1,000-strong block party near the OSU campus over the weekend, and these three young gentlemen — from left to right, Michael Shivak, 21, Matthew Coleman, 19, and Brian Witt, 21 — were arrested on charges of a felony assault on a police officer. No idea how Shivak came out so clean....

We Are All Dave McKenna CI
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Dan Snyder's dumbass libel suit expires like an old bag of airline peanuts....

Joe Girardi Explains Growing Old Together To Jorge Posada While His Mistress Bats Leadoff
A play, courtesy of the New York Yankees, in six vexing acts:...

This Is The Only Woman In The World Who Knows What It's Like To Get Caught Between Two Tim Tebows In Her Underwear
Your morning roundup for May 16, the day that Hickey got his edits from Lady Gaga. Tebow photo via @Lisa_Altobelli, who has the full shot....

ESPN Book Excerpt: Keith Olbermann, The Asshole Genius
GQ called dibs on the first exclusive excerpt of the gigantic Miller-Shales ESPN oral history, Those Guys Have All The Fun, but we've been given an excerpt of their excerpt just because nobody wants us running any more unapproved excerpts. We'll play along. So read this, then pop over to GQ for the...

Here's The Taj Gibson Dunk That Inspired Reggie Miller To Quote Martin Luther King On Air
The Bulls beat the Heat by 21 points at home in Game 1 of the Eastern Conference finals this evening. Taj Gibson, who finished with nine points and seven boards off the bench for Chicago, had the two best dunks of the game. The first left Reggie Miller speechless, and presumably on top of Steve Ke...

Nobody Wins When Batman Gets The Ever-Living Shit Kicked Out Of Him In Public
This is just sad. Guy slides into a Batman costume and tries to shake down tourists in a cash-for-photo scheme that ends up killing off the myth of superheroism (or quasi-superheroism) once and for all. Let this be a lesson to false idols everywhere: Making lewd comments to critics is nowhere near...

Your NHL Playoffs Open Thread
Neither the San Jose Sharks nor the Vancouver Canucks have won the Stanley Cup. Ever. Hell, the Sharks haven't even been to the finals. But first team to beat the other four times will fight for it against either Boston or Tampa Bay, who have both won it before. (And just like that, you have the fi...

We Are All Dave McKenna C
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until [Daniel] Snyder's dumbass libel suit gets wrapped in white linens and dropped to the bottom of the Potomac....

Here's A Picture Of Cam Newton's Absurdly Detailed Birthday Cake
Sure, Cam Newton was the No. 1 pick of a league that doesn't tangibly exist at present, but that didn't stop Sassy Girl Bakery from going all decadent with his birthday pastry. Wonder what it cost. Wonder who paid....

Older Charles Oakley Responds To Violence With Lawsuits Instead Of Fists
Former Knicks/Bulls/Wizards/Raptors/Rockets enforcer and current Charlotte Bobcats assistant coach Charles Oakley is suing the Aria hotel-casino at MGM's CityCenter complex in Vegas because security delivered onto him a "gang-style beat down" when he tried to get into the VIP-pool area. This alleg...

Here's Video Of Matthew Barnaby Leaving Jail And A Statement From His Agent
After his arrest and not-guilty plea to charges stemming from a "domestic incident," an agent for ESPN hockey analyst Matthew Barnaby issued a statement on behalf of his client. Here it is:...

Watch People Cheer For A Suicidal Turtle At The Players Championship
Your morning roundup for May 15, the day Lazy Cakes, Kush Cakes and Lulla Pies start becoming Public Enemy Nos. 1-3....

If Watching White Dudes Trying To Dance In Unison Is Your Thing, This Is The Video For You
The highlight of this video, which would never have been made if not for the mental defect which convinces most baseball players they're totally awesome and funny and kings of the world, comes at the 2:30-2:34. Because slo-mo footage of toast actually is awesome....

We Are All Dave McKenna XCIX
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Snyder's dumbass libel suit gets got....

ESPN: It's "Inappropriate For Us To Comment" On ESPN Analyst Matthew Barnaby's "Domestic Incident" Arrest
According to a story posted on ESPN.com just after 2:30 p.m. eastern today, ESPN the network declined comment on "ESPN analyst and former NHL veteran" Matthew Barnaby spending the night in jail, as mentioned in a morning post here....

A Walk-On Who Made the Team Wants You to Know What It Really Means
Alex Howell was the only freshman in the tunnel that Saturday, his chinstrap so tight it fused his jaw shut, 89,000 people packed into to the last row at Auburn's Jordan-Hare Stadium. Earlier in the week the graduate assistant… [Kotaku] ...

Wayne Rooney Decided To Send A Message With Chest Hair Today
After his side clinched a record 19th English Premier League title with 1-1 draw vs. the Blackburn Rovers, cheeky Manchester United star Wayne Rooney simply posted, "Champions http://yfrog.com/h2cjceij."...

Today In Intra-Media Twitter Spats
Jason Whitlock of FoxSports.com (@whitlockjason) started it with a Tweet stating, "NFL media, which I am one, scared lockout is damaging their profile. They're panicking and trying to create hysteria (clicks). Too invested." Pro Football Talk's Mike Florio (@profootballtalk) wasn't about to let tha...

Here's Video Of A Remarkable Goal At Last Night's World Hockey Championships
Do you believe in Finnish dudes being able to carry a puck on their stick and put it past a Russian goalkeeper to advance to the finals of an international hockey tournament? Well, Mikael Granlund is your Eruzione, if Eruzione traded in pure talent and not just moxie....