w Page 4758 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Dear Roger Goodell: This Is What A Typical NFL Career Looks Like
Roger Goodell recently took to the pulpit to debunk the popularly held notion that an NFL player's career lasts 3.5 years. The truth, Roger says, is that if you make an opening day roster as a rookie, your career will last almost six years; if you get drafted in the first round, it's nine years; and...

Tony Kornheiser Finally, Frustratingly Weighs In On Dan Snyder
Kornheiser is the most visible members of the Washington DC sports media scene. He's also employed by Dan Snyder's radio broadcasting company, and ESPN. Because of the latter, he's been silent on the matter, and because of the former, that silence speaks volumes....

Manny Ramirez Hit A One-Handed Homer At 18, And Other Revelations
Sara Rimer, a former reporter for the New York Times, returned to the paper's pages yesterday with a lovely, nostalgic piece about following the George Washington High School baseball team during its 1991 season. Manny Ramirez, then an 18-year-old on his way to signing with the Cleveland Indians, qu...

Did Everyone Notice That Jered Weaver Is The Best Pitcher In Baseball Right Now?
The younger Weaver, who has been sneakily good out for the better part of five seasons out in Anaheim, seems to finally be putting it into overdrive. His shutout last night moves him to 6-0 on the season, rarefied air for April....

Here's What Confused NFL Players Are Doing This Morning
Showing up to work out, some of them. Except not really working out. And the ones that arrived are either union guys checking the lay of the land, or players openly concerned about their workout bonuses. Mostly, players walked in, hung around for a couple of minutes then went home. Everyone's pretty...

Somebody Poisoned The Family Of NC State's Adorable Wolfpack Mascot
Today in animal cruelty and terrible affronts to school pride: someone allegedly poisoned four Tamaskan dogs with familial ties to the N.C. State mascot, Tuffy, in Elizabeth City, N.C. From the News & Observer:...

Dan Snyder Explains Why He's Being A Prick
Dan Snyder explains himself and his newly refiled lawsuit this morning over at Fred Hiatt's bullshit emporium. The piece contains all the spoon-banging you've come to expect from Snyder — "I am not thin-skinned" is probably the most ridiculous assertion on that op-ed page since whatever George Will ...

Caps Fans Skip Parody Videos, Move Straight To Priceless Masterpieces
Your morning roundup for April 26, the day we called a truce with the jellyfish kingdom....

Dumbest Fish Alive Deserve To Be Dead
This is four-and-a-half minutes of silver carp leaping, unprovoked, into a boat. It serves as a fascinating video treatise on natural selection, and possible sport fishing....

We Are All Dave McKenna LXXX
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Dan "Daniel" Snyder's dumbass libel suit goes to that great tort docket in the sky....

The NFL Lockout Is Over, At Least For A Few More Minutes
A federal judge has granted the players an injunction against the league, effectively ending the lockout. As soon as the decision is made public, the owners plan to request a stay of the injunction, effectively re-starting the lockout. [ESPN]...

DeAngelo Hall Says Jason Kidd's Son Still Has An Enormous Head
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: the outspoken Hall talks football and other more important matters....

Chris Paul's Shake-Up Of Andrew Bynum Is Pretty Close To A Point Guard's Masterpiece
In a big-to-little defensive switch in basketball, the advantage usually goes to the taller forward who can easily back down a misplaced guard for an easy basket in the paint. It's a simple, dependable play off of a switched screen or miscommunication on the defenders' side....

Sportswriters Struggle With Turns Of Phrase For Franklin Gutierrez's Spastic Pooping
At least Franklin Gutierrez now knows what caused all of his stomach problems for nearly a full year. Gutierrez visited the Mayo Clinic in Minnesota earlier this week, where he was diagnosed with irritable bowel syndrome as the cause of his stomach issues that first popped up last summer....

Lakers Player Arrested For Allegedly Assaulting Pregnant IHOP Waitress (Pregnancy Update)
But don't worry, it's not a Laker that you've heard of, or matters....

Iowa Gives Coaching Award To Man Whose Workout Sent 13 Players To The Hospital
Back in January, 13 Iowa football players were hospitalized for treatment of "exertional rhabdomyolysis," or an "acute breakdown of muscle fibers resulting in the release of muscle fiber contents (myoglobin) into the bloodstream." Basically, the Hawkeyes were pushed too hard in their workout routine...

The Knicks Come Home
Your morning roundup for April 25, the day that we were just five days away from ceasing to hear about wedding plans for people none of us know....

We Are All Dave McKenna LXXIX
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until [Daniel] Snyder's dumbass libel suit makes like an ant under a very patient child's magnifying glass on a 110-degree day with a cloudless sky....

RichRod Doesn't Think Jumping From West Virginia To Michigan Was That Good Of An Idea, After All
CBS Sports sat down with unemployed winner Rich Rodriguez on Friday. They asked whether he had "any regrets in hindsight jumping from West Virginia to Michigan"? Then, they allowed RichRod to retort:...

Erin Andrews Has Been Posting Pictures Of Various Bruises In Recent Days
With captions like "Attractive!! Guess who has to be in cocktail dress next wk??" and "B/c so many people are asking..not pretty..may need a bigger boat," ESPN's Erin Andrews posted several photographs of bruises on her leg and chin. Not quite sure why beyond these cryptic explanations:...