w Page 4757 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Isn't It About Time MLB Takes Over The Mets?
It's "un-American," Frank McCourt would say. But so are monopolies, and baseball enjoys a one-of-a-kind antitrust exemption, thus Bud Selig pretty much has the power to do whatever the hell he wants. Why not flex those muscles and save the Mets from their owners?...

Here's How Gary Neal's Buzzer-Beater Sounded To San Antonio
The Memphis Grizzlies announcers left something to be desired (mainly, any commentary whatsoever) after Gary Neal tied the game at the buzzer last night. Here's what it sounded like on the other side....

Gloria Allred Had A Rather Erotic Press Conference Yesterday (Mildly NSFW)
Gloria Allred held one of her public shaming events yesterday. She brought a family of four to her Los Angeles office to call out Roger McDowell, the Atlanta Braves pitching coach, for using "homophobic words and sexually suggestive vulgar behavior" in the presence of children:...

Jack Edwards's Baffling Pro-Boston, Anti-Royalty Rant
Noted homer Jack Edwards probably couldn't sleep last night after his beloved Bruins came back to oust the Canadiens in 7 games. But before tossing and turning with visions of Jozef Stümpel dancing in his head, he had some parting words on the NESN postgame show....

Here's A Beautiful Animation Of The First Of Five El Clásicos This Year
Your morning roundup for April 28, the day we learn that God's advice for ending a 46-day beer-only fast is with a bacon smoothie, forever and ever, Amen....

Here's Video Of That Mile-Wide Tornado Deciding, On A Whim, To Spare Alabama's Bryant-Denny Stadium
Let Tuscaloosa resident Phil Owen describe the damage that the mile-wide twister captured in this video wrought upon Alabama today:...

Today In Great Quotes
"I didn't touch her," Haynesworth responded, according to the document, adding that he doesn't "even like black girls." — Per ESPN, prosecutors filed paperwork in Superior Court in Washington saying that if football-player extraordinaire Albert Haynesworth agrees to plead guilty to simple assault t...

We Are All Dave McKenna LXXXII
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Dan Snyder's dumbass libel suit takes a dirt nap....

Yankees Accidentally Leak Personal Info Of 20,000 Season Ticket Holders
The New York Yankees accidentally distributed a file containing information on more than 20,000 season ticket accounts. The spreadsheet contains account numbers, names, addresses, phone numbers, and email addresses, and was mistakenly sent to thousands of current clients....

Livan Hernandez Is Wrapped Up In Puerto Rican Drug Dealer's Octopus Tentacles, Claims Awesome Graphic
Nationals pitcher and '97 World Series MVP Livan Hernandez is implicated in a case involving Puerto Rican drug kingpin Angel Ayala Vázquez (alternate titles: "Angelo Millones," "El Buster"). But he's not alone: El Vocero handily details all nine men compromised by the lawsuit and entangled in "los t...

"People Are Going To Start Punching Babies": Among The Almost-Thugs In Vancouver
VANCOUVER, British Columbia — Watching Canucks fans raise hell last night in downtown Vancouver reminded me of the guys who get paternity-tested on Maury, learn they're not the father and launch into the Ickey Shuffle. Some people are so beat-down that mere relief tastes like a miracle. The Canucks ...

Peyton Hillis Is <em>Madden NFL 12</em>'s Cover Star
Fans selected Peyton Hillis, the Cleveland Browns running back, to grace the cover of Madden NFL 12. Hillis prevailed in a five-week, tournament style vote-off that drew nearly 13 million votes, and was the final round winner over Philadelphia Eagles… [Kotaku] ...

Update: Oddibe McDowell's Water Bill Is Now $80.21
Via Broward County Water and Wastewater Services....

Roger Goodell Is Going To Be A Big Baby About This Lockout Until The Very End
Yesterday we brought you the gripping tales of players showing up to training facilities, only to find nothing going on and heading home. But at least one team grew a pair for a few hours: the Giants not only let DT Chris Canty into the complex to work in the weight room, but he met with Tom Coughli...

How Colleges Lie About Female Athletes
The number of women playing college sports has increased more than 500% since Title IX was introduced in 1972, but it certainly didn't level the playing field for female athletes. [Jezebel]...

Wheelchair-Bound Fan Storms Field, Very Slowly
That's 18-year-old quadriplegic soccer fan Derry Felton with the slow motion pitch invasion during League Two side Northampton Town's match this weekend. "I said to my mate 'If they score I will go on the pitch,'" Felton said. "But I didn't believe that they would. Then they did and it was a bit o...

Patrick Kane Needs A Drink
Your morning roundup for April 27, the day we let the idiots drive the national agenda....

These Old Pro Wrestling Magazines Are Delightful
For no reason and in no particular order, here are a few score of old wrestling magazine covers, spanning the 1940s to the 1990s....

Kansas City Woman, Thick As A Snicker, Coveted By Young Chiefs Cornerback For Possible Romance
Brandon Flowers, the Kansas City Chiefs very decent defensive back, spotted a fetching lady sometime this afternoon and wishes to reconnect with her in the future by some whim of destiny. Flowers added that he would have engaged in deeper conversation with the woman but did not want to irritate his ...

Albert Haynesworth Allegedly Swiped His Credit Card In A Waitress's Cleavage
This and other details from Haynesworth's indictment on assault charges stemming from a February incident at a DC hotel restaurant. It's one of two pending cases against the soon-to-be-ex-Redskin, and carries the possibility of jail time. [AP]...