wnba Page 12 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Everybody Feared The Worst When Old Man Brent Musburger Went Rogue In Vegas For A Spell
Your morning roundup for July 23, the day after we learned that high-school tennis coaches really might want to stay away from strip-club ownership....

The WNBA Has Gotten Awfully Violent Since You Last Tuned In
Kristi Toliver of the L.A. Sparks delivered an elbow square to Ketia Swanier's head last night that left the Phoenix guard writhing on the ground with blood leaking out of her left eyeball. Sorry to be graphic; it's just accurate. The play earned Toliver a flagrant foul, and Sparks assistant Joe B...

This Is The Saddest Image To Come Out Of The Sad WNBA Draft
The 2011 WNBA draft, held at 3 p.m. on a Monday, is now wrapping up. No shockers here: the Minnesota Lynx selected UConn's Maya Moore (projected during the draft to be the league MVP) with the first pick, 6'8" Australian Elizabeth Cambage was second overall and will play for Tulsa, and Courtney Vand...

40-Year-Old Sheryl Swoopes Unretires To Join Something Called "Tulsa Shock"
Sheryl Swoopes retired from the WNBA in 2008 after averaging 7 and 4 for the Seattle Storm, her worst such figures as a pro. As of 2005, Swoopes endorsed lesbian cruise line Olivia, so presumably she redeemed some vouchers to travel to Greece last year. There she played for Ravenna Esperides, alongs...

Look, WNBA Players Can Be Just As Horribly Insensitive As Male Athletes!
Cappie Pondexter knows God has a plan. And that his plan involved punishing Japan for Pearl Harbor, with an earthquake and tsunami 70 years later....

Last Night's Winner: True Equality In Women's Basketball
Former UConn standout and current WNBA star Diana Taurasi was suspended from her Turkish team after testing positive for a banned substance, reported to be a stimulant. This has nothing to do with Geno Auriemma. I'm sure he'll be brought up anyway....

Your Patronizingly Edited WNBA Finals Highlights, Game 1
The NBA's lady auxiliary sneaked in Game 1 of its Finals on Sunday so we decided to collect some of the "best" "moments" from the "game" and set them to a "classic" Herb Alpert tune. "Enjoy."...

That Time Of The Month: Patronizingly Edited WNBA Playoffs Highlights
The NBA's ladies auxiliary is in its playoffs, and yesterday the team from Atlanta clinched a berth in the finals by beating the one from New York. So here are some condescendingly packaged highlights of the little ladies scampering around the hardwood....

WNBA Player Has Funny Name When Pronounced Incorrectly
Phoenix Mercury vet DeWanna Bonner—who could probably take anyone on staff here in a game of Horse or 1-on-1, but not knockout, never knockout—has a name that begs to be said aloud in a bad Jamaican accent....

Can You Name The Things Wrong With This Lede?
"The Mercury turned the Tulsa Shock's "40 minutes of Hell" into 40 minutes of fun. Just ask the 6,580 who witnessed the Mercury set a WNBA record for points in a game in a 116-84 win Saturday night." [Arizona Republic]...

Ted Leonsis: Greatest Owner Ever?
As his first act as owner of the Wizards (and the Verizon Center), Leonsis will take down the Washington Mystics' attendance banners. All the Mystics fans will be chartering a single Volkswagen Golf to drive to the protest. [Ted's Take]...

Stop The Presses: Detroit Preferable To Somewhere
Two Shock stars, fresh from signing contract extensions, have made it known they have no intention of joining the team in making the move to Tulsa. Apparently death was not an option. [AP]...

Area Man Nods Approvingly at Wikipedia Entry On Suffrage
You can't fault David Stern's Machiavellian labor-negotiating skills. Even though we're two years away from him pulling a Gary Bettman, he's already tossing throwaway bombs, like this one launched into the lap of SI's Ian Thomsen: Chicks in the NBA!...

Owning A Russian Basketball Team Can Be Hazardous To Your Health
If future Nets owner Mikhail Prokhorov ever invites you to watch a game in the owner's box, don't accept. Not only will you be stuck watching the Nets, there's a decent chance you'll be caught up in an assassination attempt....

George Lopez Is This Year's Frank Caliendo
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Seats For Steve Kerr and 7,000 Of His Closest Friends
Yes, I know we're getting a little women's basketball-y tonight. But it's the first game of the WNBA Finals! See that packed house in Phoenix? Here's a tip: a lot of those people aren't exactly paying customers....

Muppets Win Again
Life is all about priorities, compromises and compromising priorities, which is why the WNBA's Atlanta Dream — ever heard of 'em? — may not be able to play at home if they make the playoffs. They're being bumped by puppets....

They Know Where Their Bread Is Buttered: Her Ovaries
The WNBA actually backloaded L.A.'s schedule to accommodate Candace Parker's maternity leave; the Sparks have played 5 fewer games than any other team. I only noticed this while playing Streak For The Cash, I swear....

The White House Welcomes Shock And Aww, Not That Again
In welcoming your WNBA world champions to his home, the First Bulls Fan lamented congratulating former-and-forever Piston Bill Laimbeer — controversy! scandal! developing! — so Laimbeer will probably be back next week to resolve the conflict over beers. [CBS]...