x Page 609 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Borussia Dortmund Will Soon Be So Damn Good
In what has been a pretty tame January transfer window—unless Manchester United discarding spare parts gets you excited—Borussia Dortmund made perhaps the biggest splash today when they signed 17-year-old Swedish phenom Alexander Isak, along with extending the contract of the world’s future best pla...
Another Title IX Official At Baylor Says She Quit Because Working There Was Hell
A second woman whose job at Baylor was to investigate reports of rape has spoken to ESPN’s Outside the Lines. Like Patty Crawford, the previous Title IX official who talked after leaving Baylor, Gabrielle Lyons describes a bleak situation, one that made her so paranoid she dreamed about rape. Lyons ...
I Believe The Children Are Our Future
The nation is in safe hands, everybody....
Jameis Winston Sexual Battery<em></em> Lawsuit Formally Dismissed
This morning, a U.S. District Court judge dismissed two lawsuits involving Jameis Winston, finally ending a four-year legal saga. A sexual battery lawsuit filed by Kinsman against Winston in 2015 and an earlier suit filed by Winston against Kinsman for defamation were both dismissed. The pair settle...
The Time I Didn’t Have Time For Donald Trump
I thought I was just shooing away another clown. I couldn’t have known at the time that I was shooing away a clown who would wind up becoming president of the United States....
British Police Have Identified Over 500 Potential Victims Of Sexual Abuse In Soccer
Britain’s National Police Chiefs’ Council has released an update on the widespread investigation into sexual abuse in British soccer and the numbers are staggering. According to the NPCC, there are:...
White Sox Prospect Throws Ball 110 Miles Per Hour
White Sox pitcher Michael Kopech was the 33rd overall pick in the 2014 amateur draft. As you can see here, he is capable of throwing the ball hard as hell:...
Texas Defends Hiring Ex-Baylor Assistant Casey Horny Despite His Support For Art Briles
Last week, Texas hired Baylor assistant Casey Horny to work as a special teams assistant under incoming coach Tom Herman. Horny is a Texas alum and spent three years as a graduate assistant in Austin, but he worked at Baylor for nine years before coming back to Texas. Horny was part of the group of...
New Broncos Coach Vance Joseph Left University Of Colorado After Being Accused Of Rubbing His Erect Penis On A Woman
The Denver Broncos named Vance Joseph as their new head coach last week, returning him to the state where he started out his coaching career with the University of Colorado Boulder—and abruptly left under unexplained circumstances....
A-Rod's New TV Show Sounds Sort Of Sad
I am all in on rehabbing-his-image Alex Rodriguez. A-Rod the apologetic scholar, businessman, devoted dad, analyst and Pete Rose antagonist—I eat that shit up. If you think about the trajectory of his career, it makes perfect sense that his apparent next step is to become a reality TV host:...
Colorado State Player And New Mexico Coach Get Into Postgame Screaming Match
New Mexico defeated Colorado State 84-71 behind Elijah Brown’s 25-point performance, bringing the Lobos to 3-3 in Mountain West place, good for fourth place behind the third-place Rams. The game was described as “chippy ” by a CSU student journalist; after an alleged incident in the postgame handsha...
I Am Terrified By This 9-Year-Old Girl Who Can Ruin A Tree With Her Bare Hands
Evnika Saadvakass is an adorable nine-year-old girl from Kazakhstan who now lives in Russia, and I’m almost certain she could easily kill me with her bare hands. ...
Alex Ovechkin Didn't Wait Long To Score His 1,000th Point
Everything about Alexander Ovechkin’s 1,000th career point was fitting: that it came on a goal, that it happened just 35 seconds in the game, and that he went back out and scored another one later on....
Philly News Station Forgets Joe Frazier's Been Dead For Five Years, Wishes Him A Happy Birthday
Joe Frazier is not going to be meeting with friends and supporters this evening at City Hall at 6:00, because, sadly, Joe Frazier has been dead since 2011. That did not stop Philadelphia news station Fox29 from reporting that Frazier was turning 73 today....
Every Episode Of <i>It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia</i>, Ranked
It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia has been on the air since 2005, and somehow, a show about five terrible idiots who hatch insane schemes and treat each other with unabashed disdain is probably going to end up as the longest running live-action comedy series in TV history. The show is just getting i...
Floyd Mayweather Is Still Using The Same Old Domestic Violence Excuses
Retired boxer Floyd Mayweather went through the ESPN carwash today, and sat down for an interview with SportsCenter anchors Cari Champion and David Lloyd. To the anchors’ credit, they asked Mayweather multiple questions about his history with domestic violence, only to be met with the same old talk...
Atlanta Hawks Discipline GM For Joking About Angry Black Women At Fan Event
After an internal investigation, Atlanta Hawks GM Wes Wilcox will be formally disciplined by the team over a joke he made last month at a fan event, per ESPN. As Deadspin reported last Friday, Wilcox was fielding questions from a group of fans and tried to ease tensions by saying, as one of our sour...
Newspaper Scientists Engineer Story That Will Make Everyone Self-Righteously Angry
It’s easy to write a story that pisses off one or two demographics. But how can you piss off every demographic simultaneously—all for different reasons? At last, the New York Times may have pinpointed how to accomplish this proud feat. ...
The Latest Big Thing On The Internet Is A Turkish Chef Who Sensually Prepares Meat
Nusret Gökçe owns a chain of Nusr-Et steakhouses, with locations in Turkey and one in Dubai. Because of his unique, tender, sensual preparation of his meat—many examples can be found on his Instagram—he’s recently become something of a meme on the American internet....
We Need To Tax The Rich But Instead We'll Do The Opposite
Economic inequality in America has been rising steadily since the Reagan era. Why? A new research paper identifies what it say is the main culprit: the fact that we’ve stopped taxing the rich. ...