x Page 662 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
<i>Shanghai Noon</i> Is The Goofy Kung-Fu Western You Didn't Know You Wanted
Rush Hour was a silly little action-comedy B-movie that blew the fuck up in 1998, and it was easy to get the sense, watching things play out, that Hollywood wasn’t quite sure how to deal with that level of unexpected success. The studios could make more Rush Hour movies, of course, which they absolu...
Why Is Floyd Mayweather Fighting A Nobody This Weekend?
Throughout most of his career, Elvis Presley was the highest paid performer in show business. He was managed by an old school flim-flam artist called Colonel Tom Parker, who passed himself off as a kind of Southern gentleman even though he was actually a Dutchman named van Kuijk. ...
Does Rex Ryan Have A Photo Of His Wife's Feet On His Desk?
Everyone knows that Rex Ryan really, really loves his wife’s feet. He loves them so much that it’s not impossible to imagine him putting a framed photograph of her feet right on his work desk....
Report: Floyd Mayweather Received Banned IV Before Pacquiao Fight
The day before his fight against Manny Pacquiao, Floyd Mayweather took two intravenous infusions totaling 750 milliliters. The bags contained mixtures of saline and vitamins, but their contents are irrelevant: any IVs over 50 mL are strictly banned. The Nevada State Athletic Commission, which sancti...
Mexican TV Station Uses Donald Trump To Troll USMNT
The USMNT and Mexico are all set to square off next month in a crucial, one-off playoff for admission into the 2017 Confederations Cup in Russia. One Mexican TV station has pretty ingeniously cut up bits from a Donald Trump speech to predict America’s downfall. Here’s the TV spot:...
This Is Perfect
Ohio State is doing typical Ohio State things against Virginia Tech, but this spin move by Braxton Miller—one that led to a 53 yard touchdown—is anything but ordinary....
High Schoolers Who Attacked Ref Suspended, Could Face Criminal Charges
The two San Antonio-area high school football players who targeted and blindsided an official during a game Friday have been suspended and could face criminal charges, according to ESPN....
<i>Kung Fu Hustle </i>Is Goofy, Referential, And Totally Insane
The whole point of the Jim Carrey movie The Mask is the idea of using CGI to combine a pretty standard and amiable zero-to-hero comedy with the antic, absurdist slapstick of Bugs Bunny cartoons. Stephen Chow’s 2004 movie Kung Fu Hustle came a decade after The Mask and from a different side of the wo...
Skins Ban Non-Season Ticket Holders From Using Will Call
I was actively hoping I wouldn’t be writing about Washington’s football team again tonight, but they seem to be unable to keep themselves out of the news. Which would be an admirable trait, if it were ever for something positive. ...
Someone Appears To Be Trying To Hoax The Marlins President Out Of His Job
When the Miami Marlins sent Marcell Ozuna to the minors on July 5, there was more in play than just giving the slumping third-year outfielder a chance “to get his rhythm back,” as Ozuna’s agent Scott Boras said he was told. Whether Ozuna becomes eligible for arbitration after this season or next dep...
Summer Movies 2015: <i>Mad Max</i> Rises, Adam Sandler Sinks
For all the talk about how summer movies are supposedly rotting everyone’s souls, this summer produced:...
True Beauty Is Vince Wilfork In Nothing But Overalls
Vince Wilfork is great and I love him, which means I don’t even care that this moment from last night’s episode of Hard Knocks was probably cooked up by some HBO producer. Just look at this man!...
The Royals Have Chickenpox
Two Royals players have been infected with chickenpox and have been quarantined, and the team is monitoring other potentially at-risk players. It’s sort of funny—it’s the last thing you’d expect a ballplayer to miss extended time for—but it can seriously affect adults, and with the playoffs a month ...
Rob Manfred Kicks Shoeless Joe Jackson Back Into The Grave
The appointment of a new MLB commissioner is always a good time for certain special interest groups—spitball enthusiasts, Montreal baseball fans, Pete Rose truthers—to begin seeking favors. “Maybe,” they think, “the new commissioner will be more reasonable than the last!” This is presumably why the ...
Are The Red Sox Confiscating Signs Supporting Don Orsillo Or Not?
Earlier tonight, the Boston Globe’s Dan Shaughnessy reported that the Red Sox were doing all they could to quell dissent over their unpopular decision to drop NESN play-by-play man Don Orsillo after the season (emphasis mine):...
Eras To Live In, Ranked
The past was awful. It was a time of choleric ignoramuses flopping around in their own shit and killing each other for entertainment. I feel bad for everyone who lived before today....
Results Of Baylor Investigation: We Need Another Investigation
In reaction to one of its football players being convicted of sexually assaulting another student, Baylor announced it would investigate “the circumstances associated with this case.” Merely a week later, the university released results from the law professor-led investigation at 7 p.m. Central on a...
Wait, Floyd Mayweather Made <i>How Much </i>Money Last Year?
So a thing that’s been in the news recently is the ongoing exchange of sick burns between boxer “Fuckboy” Floyd Mayweather and mixed martial artist Ronda Rousey. This beef is verbal, with tension sparked and stoked by thickheaded, numbnutted clownmen who think that pitting an athlete of one sport ag...
