x Page 778 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Is It Possible To <em>Accidentally</em> Break A Player's Jaw With A Two-Handed Stick Swing?
A major junior hockey disciplinarian is going to have to decide, after the QMJHL indefinitely suspended Moncton's Ross Johnston for this play. Johnston's stick struck Halifax's Brian Lovell in the face, breaking his jaw, and requiring surgery that will keep him out the rest of the season. But is i...
Meet The Cowboys' New $2 Million Luxury Bus, Named "The Elegant Lady"
Jerry Jones's wet dream of crystal and chrome has hit the road. "The Elegant Lady," the Dallas Cowboys' new bus, made a brief appearance at the Super Bowl, but it's officially being unveiled ahead of the NFL combine. Forty-five feet long, 8'6" wide, and 13 feet tall, the coach will shuttle Cowboys b...
Cam Ward Is Bested By A Bouncing Puck Shot From Behind The Red Line
This is just poor. Max Pacioretty notched his first goal of the season in what can generously be described as a wrist shot, modified knuckle-puck, but more accurately described as a dump in....
Josh Hamilton Says Dallas Isn't A Baseball Town, "True Baseball Fans" Won't Boo Him When He Returns
Josh Hamilton's in Anaheim now, after five up-and-down seasons in Texas. It was mostly down at the end, as the Rangers choked away the division and bowed out in a one-game playoff, with Hamilton hearing boos down the stretch for his declining numbers. (He blamed it in part on quitting tobacco.)...
Why Your Children's Television Program Sucks: <em>Max & Ruby</em>
A look at the awful children’s programming you’re forced to endure before you can finally kick the kids out of the TV room to watch sports for eight hours. Illustration by Jim Cooke. ...
"I Chase Him, I Bite Him, Bad Man, He Tasty": Police Dog Writes Witness Statement
Prosecutors in England, prepping for a case, repeatedly contacted a police department for details on the arrest—specifically, they demanded a witness statement from "PD Peach," an officer who assisted. The problem is, PD stands for Police Dog, and Peach is an adorable German Shepherd, and as such is...
Top Fuel Dragster Explodes, Showers Track With Shrapnel, Leaves Driver Unscathed
Upon reaching the finish line in something called the NHRA "Winternationals" today, Antron Brown was going around 300 mph when his 8,000 horsepower engine exploded, causing his two back tires to also explode. He then lost control of the car as it burst into flames and careened into the wall. It th...
Alfredo Aceves Is In Mid-Season Form
Alfredo Aceves began tossing batting practice this morning, pretty standard procedure for this time of year. Alfredo Aceves does not know the meaning of pretty standard. So, instead of using it as a slow and steady way to ease into spring training and build arm strength, he used it as another opport...
Adrien Broner TKOs Gavin Rees, Retains WBC Lightweight Belt, And This One Punch Tells The Fight's Story
Adrien Broner, the supposedly brash and careless but actually cheerful and confident lightweight champ, dispatched Gavin Rees last night in Atlantic City to improve his undefeated record to 26-0. It wasn't the cakewalk some were expecting, though it would eventually come to an end by TKO in the fif...
Carl Pavano's Freak Spleen Injury Nearly Killed Him
Live by the freak injury, nearly die by the freak injury: On January 12, Carl Pavano slipped on some ice outside his Vermont home, fell onto the handle of his snow shovel, and after taking a moment to recover, went about his business until he couldn't anymore:...
That $5,000 Football "Signed By American Presidents" Is The Most Damning Of Jesse Jackson Jr.'s Alleged Illicit Spoils
If the federal case against him is accurate, Jesse Jackson Jr. is taking a fall in part because of his covetousness for a "football signed by American Presidents" valued at $5,000. The former U.S. Congressman from Illinois and a conspirator are accused of fraudulently raising campaign funds and usin...
Did The Movie <em>Heathers</em> Kill The Name Heather?
Welcome to Dataspin, a new weekly data visualization of whatever the fuck....
"What Do You Want Me To Say?": A Day In The Publicity Machine With Adrien Broner, Boxing's Newest Star
Adrien "The Problem" Broner—23 years old, 135 pounds, undefeated, and one of the five or so best boxers in the world today—rolled into the lobby of 1221 Avenue of the Americas just before 10 a.m. Tuesday morning, along with two coaches, his friend, his large, superfluous security man, and a harried-...
Why Football Won’t Go the Way of Boxing (Yet)
Originally published in Bloomberg View...
The Coming War: A Military Doctor's Field Guide To Masturbating In Afghanistan
The past decade of combat operations in Iraq and Afghanistan has given military physicians such as myself the important opportunity to gather unprecedented data on some of our most pressing medical issues. This data set has spurred advances in the care of trauma, hemorrhagic shock, traumatic brain i...
Stranded Carnival Cruise Ship's Toilets Are So Full Of Shit They Are Falling Off The Walls, And Other Gross Details From Someone Aboard
Jayme Lamm—freelance sportswriter and proprietor of TheBlondeSide.com—is currently stranded aboard the Carnival Triumph, a cruise ship that has been without power for four days after an engine room fire. We've received sporadic dispatches from her over the past few days via text message, and she's ...
Can You Find The Five Differences In The New Vikings Logo?
The Vikings have not "changed" or "altered" their Norseman logo, or whatever other plebeian teams do. It has been "enhanced." Play with the slider above to see both the old and new logos....
Just How Many Women Are Naked On The Internet? A Back-Of-The-Envelope Calculation
Oh, hello! And welcome to the now-weekly LIVE edition of the Deadspin Funbag. We'll do this every Thursday right around 1 p.m. and go until 3pm. To submit a question to the live Funbag, you gotta post down in the bowels of the discussion section below. It is there, and only there, where your questio...
Houston Texans Tackle Sings That One Gotye Song Everyone Knows
Just getting this out of the way now—it's obviously not a good showing. OK, moving on. Texans tackle Duane Brown and some other lady performed "Somebody That I Used To Know" by Gotye and Kimbra on Houston's KRBE 104.1 morning drive show this morning because Brown apparently loves the song and work...
Leonard Cooper, <em>Jeopardy</em> Folk Hero, Still Could Have Lost When He Wrote "I Just Won $75,000"
Everyone is rightly lauding Leonard Cooper, the winner of the Jeopardy Teen Tournament, as America's coolest high schooler. When Final Jeopardy came around, Leonard didn't know the answer. So he wrote something much better. He wrote,...